"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Are our modern alpha and beta distinctions f*cked up by civilisation?

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
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You know, back when we lived in tribes and not cubicles an alpha was alpha *because* he was the best provider. Women had no problem finding alpha and beta in the same man because to be a provider you had to be alpha and vice versa.

So in the old days, you being alpha (basically a good physique, sex appeal to women) made you into a provider too because the best hunters, ie. the most alpha men, were the best providers. Being alpha enabled you to provide. But we live in a time in which being alpha doesn't mean being a provider and you can be a provider without being alpha. The only limiting factor would be if your genes were a bad match with hers (ie. incest).

Of course there are different mating strategies among animals, just look at the other great apes who have everything from (roughly summarised) alpha monopoly to free for all to promiscuous infanticide. But assuming that we used to run with alpha = provider = good mate, have we made ourselves go haywire?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Shivastorm_88

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AttackFormation said:
You know, back when we lived in tribes and not cubicles an alpha was alpha *because* he was the best provider. Women had no problem finding alpha and beta in the same man because to be a provider you had to be alpha and vice versa.

So in the old days, you being alpha (basically a good physique, sex appeal to women) made you into a provider too because the best hunters, ie. the most alpha men, were the best providers. Being alpha enabled you to provide. But we live in a time in which being alpha doesn't mean being a provider and you can be a provider without being alpha. The only limiting factor would be if your genes were a bad match with hers (ie. incest).

Of course there are different mating strategies among animals, just look at the other great apes who have everything from (roughly summarised) alpha monopoly to free for all to promiscuous infanticide. But assuming that we used to run with alpha = provider = good mate, have we made ourselves go haywire?
Who cares? Society changed, you can either go with the flow and adapt yourself to it, or reminisce about the past being the "good old days long gone" and stagnate.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
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I don't care about the "righteousness" of either approach, I was just using harsh language.
 
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