"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Are most men AFCs with women?

confusedstate

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I’m wondering roughly what percent of men are AFCs when it comes to interacting with the opposite sex.

Take an old friend, for instance. We caught up on facebook a few years ago, and I asked him how he’s been, and the first thing he says is “Have a new girlfriend, been busy with that” as to show off. His girlfriend would be a 4 to most guys regardless of taste…not a beast, but not attractive at all in face or body. I asked him if he wanted to hang out, and he said “I’m going out with my girl that day” once again as to brag.

For most men, is having a girlfriend, even an UG girlfriend, an accomplishment in and of itself?

I know a guy who’s more alpha…plays sports…doesn’t look AFC, etc., no homo, but not ugly…and he married a woman that would be a 3 or 4 to the majority…not even average…ugly face, average body and he’s only in his mid 20s.

Do most guys just take what they can get? And the guys you do see with attractive women, they just got her by luck or being in the right place at the right time?

I know there are naturals out there, and guys that are socially intuitive, or guys that start to “get it” at one point…but are most men just “I’m lucky that some girl is even paying attention to me?”

I’m also wondering, is it possible that with some of these guys, they don’t value physical appearance at all, maybe knew or dated a hottie at one point and she was difficult to please, so they went the other route and found an ugly, easy to talk to woman?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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SoldMySoul

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I will take a stabbed at this one!

IMO, 90% of men are afcs... With that said, there are varying degrees of afcism. Some more so than others. Most of us have some afc tendencies.

Then they are those who just do not give a fvck!!!
 

zekko

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On this forum they will tell you that most guys are AFC. Like Sold My Soul above, he says 90% are AFC. I actually don't think guys are quite as bad off as they want to portray on this forum. Most of the guys I know seem to be doing all right. Of course these aren't high school age guys.

The main thing to remember is, like Sold My Soul says, there are varying degrees of AFCism. Things are seldom black and white, it's mostly shades of gray. Most guys have a mix of DJ and AFC in them. Few are 100% one or the other.
 

jophil28

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Here is a very quick test of your own AFC tendencies -

1. Do you go out of your way to avoid upsetting or offending women's sensitivities. Do you choose your words carefully?

2. When you plan a 'date' do you often ask her what she would like to do before you decide?

3. Have you ever been publicly "chewed out" by your G/f in public ?

4. Have you ever canceled your time with your buddies to do what she wanted to do instead ?

5. When she sulks or gets miffed with you, do you try to 'make it right' ?

Any "Yes " to these Q's indicates that you have some work to do on yourself .
 
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Nkognito

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I guess it depends, when you start to not care and really find what you want in a person and maybe they did. I know this sounds like a typical AFC reponse but I have seen my friends go through a nice set of HB8's and 9's but they just conflicted. One of my friends has a nice wife who is about 7 years younger but has bad acne. I don't consider her cute and her body while slim has little features. But one thing they both have in common....they are both get upset stomachs with dairy products.

I guess there is a balance between beauty and brains where we can connect.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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FastMen

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i think : yes , mostly because the chick flicks and media want to show you how to "win a girl" by being romantic etc, i think it works with the 10% of girls
 

sux2bu

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Most pu$$y whipped guys are AFC through and through.
 

The Bad Ass Canadian

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It's a sliding scale......

90% of AFCs are AFCs, and maybe 90% of AFCs are DJs just having a bad spell..... everyone has certain DJ qualities that come out, when they find their comfort zone with a woman and with themselves. Eveyone has had their "I'm so pimp" night. The DJs who get there, live that way most of the time.

The rest of the men are just at varying stages of figuring it out. I honestly don't believe in the AFC term, anymore. It's too black and white.
 

Atom Smasher

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jophil28 said:
Here is a very quick test of your own AFC tendencies -
1. Do you go out of your way to avoid upsetting or offending women's sensitivities. Do you choose your words carefully?

Not any more. I used to all the time but I've got that handled.

2. When you plan a 'date' do you often ask her what she would like to do before you decide?

Nope. They perceive that as weakness.

3. Have you ever been publicly "chewed out" by your G/f in public ?

Wouldn't stand for it EVER.

4. Have you ever canceled your time with your buddies to do what she wanted to do instead ?

Nope.

5. When she sulks or gets miffed with you, do you try to 'make it right' ?

I used to in a sense. Now, I let her have her pity party for a while until her mood changes.

Any "Yes " to these Q's indicates that you have some work to do on yourself .

I guess I've been coming along fairly well.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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spinaroonie

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The traditional balance between masculine and feminine polarity has been upset in the West today.

Women need men to be dominant to feel attraction. Yet women refuse to be subservient.

One of two outcomes:
1. Constant power struggle
2. Man betaizes into AFC chump, woman loses attraction

End result - women (and men) are miserable. Sh*t ain't going to work out.

If both men and women accept their natural roles, both parties are happy.
 

HeMan

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judging someone based on how good looking their girlfriend is just wrong.

just because there girlfriends are not hot doesnt mean there weak.

all the super hot girls i know are annoying and pretty much undatable

my girlfriend is a 7 and an amazing girlfriend
 

HeyPachuco!

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Not sure if anyone already mentioned it, but its possible your profession, hobbies and general outlook on mode of living could determine whether you're a AFC with women or not, sometimes. I mean you could get a tough roughneck oil miner, who can be killed anytime on the job, but when he gets back home to his girlfriend or wife, could be a total sap. Another example, is you could get a dude who is more soft with his skills, but be a total alpha-pimp-slapping shmuck?

Just a little food for thought, can your profession, upbringing, social class and hobbies transcript you as AFC or not?
 

jophil28

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Atom Smasher said:
1. Do you go out of your way to avoid upsetting or offending women's sensitivities. Do you choose your words carefully?

Not any more. I used to all the time but I've got that handled.

2. When you plan a 'date' do you often ask her what she would like to do before you decide?

Nope. They perceive that as weakness.

3. Have you ever been publicly "chewed out" by your G/f in public ?

Wouldn't stand for it EVER.

4. Have you ever canceled your time with your buddies to do what she wanted to do instead ?

Nope.

5. When she sulks or gets miffed with you, do you try to 'make it right' ?

I used to in a sense. Now, I let her have her pity party for a while until her mood changes.

Any "Yes " to these Q's indicates that you have some work to do on yourself .

I guess I've been coming along fairly well.
Congratulations AtomS, you are the 2010 Valedictorian :cool:
 

Groovy

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PectoralisMajor said:
who cares? stop worrying about others and concentrate on YOURSELF.

enjoy.
Yeah... Also what I tought when I saw this thread. Why would someone ask this question, this is what I wonder.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

zekko

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Why would someone ask this question, this is what I wonder.
I'm not saying this is the case with the original poster, but:
A lot of guys who come here seem to want to fantasize that the entire world is full of wusses and chumps. This presumably makes them feel better about themselves, because they've read a few tips on a pickup board, so that makes them a REAL MAN compared with everyone else.

Fact is, all men have testosterone, and most are going to engage in testosterone driven behaviors.
 

Atom Smasher

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jophil28 said:
Congratulations AtomS, you are the 2010 Valedictorian :cool:
Well, your test does help me realize that I've come along pretty nicely. And I used to be what would be considered a pretty hopeless case. I cringe when I think of my AFC days, and it's amazing how one can feel Mr. AFC trying to creep back in on occasion when I'm dealing with women. It's a good thing I recognize his foul stench and don't allow him access (for the most part).
 

confusedstate

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I’m just basing this on what I see around me. I don’t know any guys who are dating a HB, and the one guy I know who is dating a relatively cute woman, she has a lot of emotional problems and doesn’t feel she deserves better than him, and she’s just a plain jane 6 to begin with.

Of course, when you go to the mall or something, you see cool looking guys with pretty women of different levels, but it seems the majority of guys are content with an UG or fattie. I’m in no way saying these guys should aim for a 10…but you can definitely find a nice 6-7-8 that has the looks and doesn’t have the HB behavior or drama. They seem content that some 3 "likes them."
 

zekko

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I don’t know any guys who are dating a HB
Well, somebody's dating them.

This is the way it is where I live:
I'm thinking of some of the hottest girls I know. Most of the guys they're with are fairly average, really. They may have an outstanding attribute, like a great smile or are tall. People tend to pair up where I live, it's all about couples. It's a relatively small town.

Once the hotties are gone, then guys snatch up the more average looking girls. Most of the real hose beasts are unattached, not worth the effort I guess.

Then you have your player guy types, and a lot of younger guys, they make the rounds with the younger girls that are still available and the girls that will cheat on their boyfriends/husbands. You can usually tell them from the others, they carry themselves differently.
 
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