sazc
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2016
- Messages
- 4,468
- Reaction score
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Are boundaries best communicated covertly or overtly?
- Thread starter El Payaso
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
- Not an argument.
- Not a working example.
- Not a boundary.
- Not a seducer.
Summary
When a man explicitly sets boundaries, he is using an ultimatum. Ultimatums don't work. A man can never say "You MUST do X" or "You MUST NOT do Y" and have it be effective.
This is different than not tolerating her BS and being willing to walk.
Boundaries should be implicit, and a man should put his foot down over certain actions as they happen. He should not set rules for her future actions.
In one case you're always happy either way, you're happy with her or without her. In the second case you are implying your happiness is based on her behavior, and that you'll be upset if you don't have her.
These are not the same thing and I think this is where the disagreement lies.
When a man explicitly sets boundaries, he is using an ultimatum. Ultimatums don't work. A man can never say "You MUST do X" or "You MUST NOT do Y" and have it be effective.
This is different than not tolerating her BS and being willing to walk.
Boundaries should be implicit, and a man should put his foot down over certain actions as they happen. He should not set rules for her future actions.
- Good (Implicit Boundary): If you want to date him, that's fine, but I need to cancel our plans for this week.
- Bad (Explicit Boundary) : You are not allowed to date other men, or else.
In one case you're always happy either way, you're happy with her or without her. In the second case you are implying your happiness is based on her behavior, and that you'll be upset if you don't have her.
These are not the same thing and I think this is where the disagreement lies.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
I love expressing my boundaries without uttering a word...this is an art that if you master it fvcks their head royally,took me a while to get it down as it requires you in complete control of your emotions.