Approached 100 women during the day - No success!

summersky

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 23, 2014
Messages
106
Reaction score
12
Age
38
I am an average looking, 1,73 m tall guy and I am living in germany. I started approaching women during the day on the street. I used all kinds of openers, direct and indirect. I think my body language and my voice is ok and I am not nervous around women. I got into a few nice conversations with women, but when I asked for the number or asked about going out, they always said they either have a boyfriend or are not interested.

I approached 100 (from average to hot) women so far, didn't get one number. I never thought it will be that hard. Not even one number after 100 approaches. I start to think it is because I am short and just average looking. Is approaching during the day only for attractive men? I saw videos of successfull approaches but the guys in the videos were tall and above average looking. I saw videos of good looking guys who were shy and had a nervous body language and they were successfull. I want to keep going but is it worth it? What if my results will be the same even after 1000 approaches?

Who has similar results here? Who has good results and can give me some advice?

Regards
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,384
Reaction score
10,617
Your height is lousy for a Western nation. 1.73 m is 5'7". In the United States, that's below average height and likely below average in Germany too.

Short without overly impressive facial aesthetics is a difficult selling proposition.

Game is a combination of looks, money, status, and personality. Your money, status, and personality is likely not enough to overcome your issues with looks.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
4,196
Reaction score
3,616
Who has good results and can give me some advice?
Women always know when you're not who you pretend to be.
All your approaches are outcome dependent. You don't get a number, so you failed.
You don't see the value of failure, how would you see the value of success?
 

Young OG

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 6, 2015
Messages
1,258
Reaction score
1,068
Location
USA
I am an average looking, 1,73 m tall guy and I am living in germany. I started approaching women during the day on the street. I used all kinds of openers, direct and indirect. I think my body language and my voice is ok and I am not nervous around women. I got into a few nice conversations with women, but when I asked for the number or asked about going out, they always said they either have a boyfriend or are not interested.

I approached 100 (from average to hot) women so far, didn't get one number. I never thought it will be that hard. Not even one number after 100 approaches. I start to think it is because I am short and just average looking. Is approaching during the day only for attractive men? I saw videos of successfull approaches but the guys in the videos were tall and above average looking. I saw videos of good looking guys who were shy and had a nervous body language and they were successfull. I want to keep going but is it worth it? What if my results will be the same even after 1000 approaches?

Who has similar results here? Who has good results and can give me some advice?

Regards
You might want to reevaluate the way you look and how well you are at talking. Your hair style might not look good and/or you might dress badly. You also might not be that good at talking to people and need to work on that.
 

Ricky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 9, 2002
Messages
3,940
Reaction score
714
Age
50
What did you say to them to open them?
You need to work on your closing skills. It isnt easy to close with time constraints, you have to keep working on this
 

corrector

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 12, 2009
Messages
9,042
Reaction score
3,473
On the plus side you said you had some nice convos with women. There was no bad rejection (ie nobody was mean, threatened to call the police/called the police....), which means you are still in one piece, and are alive to try again if you wish. It's not really that bad. Maybe it was just a bad day. You might get more luckier if you try another day. Repeat it again.
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
5,353
Reaction score
7,905
Age
47
You aren't connecting with them. 100 approaches and you should have got something.

Facial expressions, cleverness, body language are all important.

It's never been my thing because it doesnt have much depth. I'd rather have a 15min conversation at a bar where I can touch her or maybe even dance together . Pretty tough to connect with a woman on a personal level in a few minutes on the street.

It's going to take better looks to pull it off. The great thing is you stayed in it even tho you got your azz handed to ya. That will serve you well down the road.

Props for going after it. I'd go hunting somewhere else where it's more productive.
 

Alvafe

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 26, 2012
Messages
3,370
Reaction score
1,576
Age
40
try a 1000th, and no only woman, everyone just try to chat up people to pass time, your problem is you are wanting something and not just talking and then whn you see a woman who are answering in a way you like you ask her number, just trying and not learning from it the problem is you
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,384
Reaction score
10,617
You should simply take advantage of opportunities while out doing things in your daily life.
This is the better guiding belief surrounding non-bar approaching. With non-bar approaching, dedicated "approach sessions" are often a waste of time. Men who do "approach sessions" do them because their daily routines are not giving them enough opportunities to do approaches in their daily routines.

It is a common problem for singles of both sexes to have a subpar daily routine. These subpar daily routines contribute to why they are single and why they have to rely on things like swipe apps, bar visits, and non-bar "approach sessions" for men. Almost no women would ever linger around a mall or outdoors to try to attract approaches.

you are wasting a lot of time for very low returns on investments doing "scheduled" approaches.
You aren't connecting with them. 100 approaches and you should have got something.
Non-bar approaching has the potential to be very inefficient. Getting nothing from 100 approaches is not that surprising to me. Doing 100 approaches as 5'7" man could result in 100 failures. A 6'2" man with good facial aesthetics and a normal range BMI might only need to do 10-15 approaches to get something.

I've done approach sessions outdoors and in malls/bookstores on weekend afternoons. I'm 5'10" and my photos have been rated around a '7' online. I'm probably in the upper part of the middle of the bell curve on overall looks. A lot of my approach sessions are inefficient. The bigger issue that I have in doing approach sessions is finding women that I think would warrant an approach. I don't believe in 'spam approaching' so I try to increase my efficiency by trying to select for the most approachable women. Even with approachable women, it isn't very efficient. I do think it would be easier for me if I were over 6'0", had bigger muscles, and was wearing a solid gold Rolex while approaching. Game is a combination of looks, money, status, and personality. 5'10", decent facial aesthetics, and not being overweight is good but not that good.

It's never been my thing because it doesnt have much depth. I'd rather have a 15min conversation at a bar where I can touch her or maybe even dance together . Pretty tough to connect with a woman on a personal level in a few minutes on the street.

Props for going after it. I'd go hunting somewhere else where it's more productive.
Roosh called street game the most difficult venue hands down back in 2012.


Based on my experiences with street type game, I agree.

In the 10+ years in my current city, I've done more of my street type game on designated recreational walking paths and occasionally in city parks. The walking paths are tough for game. Most women aren't receptive because they are moving and wearing headphones/earbuds. There is some natural stopping points on each of the trails where I game that are ideal for approaching but it's still tough.

Between dog walkers and earbuds, there's a reason why outdoor and street game is so difficult.

Most US cities are not well designed for pure street game. The older US cities that were quite populated prior to 1900 are the best ones for pure street game. Those cities are: New York City, Boston, Chicago, Philadelphia, Baltimore, and Washington DC.

@summersky is doing his street approaching in Germany, so US experiences with street approaching are less relevant.

Outside of the United States, street game is a little bit different. A lot of older European and some Middle Eastern cities are more conducive to pedestrians. Nick Krauser and Tom Torero built a street game model from approaching pedestrians in London, England. Prague has been known for street game.
 

AmsterdamAssassin

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2023
Messages
4,196
Reaction score
3,616
If you do street approaches, don't keep repeating the same mistakes. If something doesn't work, don't do it another hundred times before you start fixing it.

I have a great ratio of success with 'street approaches", because:
- I'm not outcome dependent, I don't 'approach to seduce', I have conversations and make connections.
- I already have all the sex I need, so when I converse with a woman, it's not about getting them into my bed.
- I have extensive experience in conversing with (problematic) women, because I counsel people with PTSD
- everything about me (appearance, vibe, voice, mindset) has congruence, so women are more likely to trust me
 

Travel memoir21

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2020
Messages
441
Reaction score
395
Age
38
Location
Rio Grande Valley, Texas
Another thing you can do is to go to areas where you don't have to get the numbers but can actually pull off a mini date if there's a cafe or Coffee Shop near by.

Just invite them over.
 

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
3,190
Reaction score
3,943
Yeah, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing while expecting a different result.

So, by default C approach is an insane activity. Most men are aware of this thus most men don't do it.

Ofcourse the next question is: " whut ammi 'posed to do then "?

I'd say; keep going BUT try something different. Perhaps your approaches should be sneakier. Or more straight forward.

On top of that you might wanna reevaluate your physical presence...are you dressing up, smelling good, hitting the gym, haircut that fits you ect ect.

Some day this will favor you. So don't let the rejections bring you down.
 

Bokanovsky

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2012
Messages
4,710
Reaction score
4,324
Cold-approaching random women and asking for their numbers is a fool's errand. It's not considered socially appropriate anymore, so your odds of success are low.
 

BPH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 8, 2010
Messages
2,003
Reaction score
433
Location
Wilmington, DE
As somebody who cold approaches, there is a time and place for it.

First of all I never do it early/during the day, always evening/at night. I used to do it at the beach or the mall. It's probably less socially acceptable to do the latter than the former now.

But the best place to do it would be at some place like a bar, where it's expected.

Some girl walking to or from her work/lunch break/errands on a weekday will treat you as a nuisance compared to one who's out at night by herself or with her girls because she's single.

That said, being 5'7" and 38 years old you are objectively at an initial disadvantage so you have to make up for that in other ways; go to the gym, dress well, have good hygiene, if you have money show it off with some of your accessories, etc.

Also, I don't know how these conversations are flowing, but it helps to be a normal and flirty person first while naturally progressing to getting her number - I don't know if you're just going straight for the number rather than feeling out the interaction.

There's a lot to this, but that's also why you approach more. But you have to approach as if you're not dependent on the outcome instead of trying to meet a quota of 100 or whatever in a day.
 

Gamisch

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 2, 2022
Messages
3,190
Reaction score
3,943
Cold-approaching random women and asking for their numbers is a fool's errand. It's not considered socially appropriate anymore, so your odds of success are low.
Seems like it. Somehow the social climate just aint good for spam approach. As @BHP says, better save those "cojones " for in the bar, where you can enlarge those cojones with some alcohol. Or at least your targets,the women, have lower inhibitions due to alcohol AND being open to it.

A lotta man shyte on the bar/ club, because it is indeed taxing as FECK when you get older. Yet it is still the best option if you already decided you'll approach women their auras.
 

summersky

Don Juan
Joined
Sep 23, 2014
Messages
106
Reaction score
12
Age
38
Thank you very much for the responses and advices! I keep doing it and try to improve everything I can.

So I had a good day this week, approached 7 girls and got 3 numbers. I am talking to one of this girls now. Second one didn't reply. With the third one we texted a bit, then she went ghost. Funny, because she seemed very interested, asked questions and agreed to a date.

It's a bit frustrating, that I rarely meet girls, who are totally my type but I guess that's normal. I think it will take many many months, if not years to get a girl who is totally my type through cold approach.

Regards
 

SW15

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 31, 2020
Messages
12,384
Reaction score
10,617

Neither man has good verbal game. One has better outcomes because he's roughly an 8 in looks.
 
Top