"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Any advice on quick thinking

Jariel

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I have missed so many opportunities with gorgeous women all because I wasn't quick enough on the uptake or didn't know what to say/do in the moment. I have lost count of the times I look back at an interaction and think "If only I'd said/done that..."

I'm not a nervous person, but I am more of a slow and methodical thinker and often find my mind goes blank whenever I'm on the spot. It happens in many circumstances, not just with women, and it's definitely one of the flaws that hold me back and I'd like to work on. When I first discovered pick up I would try to overcome this by rehearsing lines and routines, but it was always so fake and rarely fit the situations I found myself in.

Can anyone recommend any training or tips for basically speeding up my thought processes?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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derby1

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yes practice all day for the following month on fat/old cashiers.

I purposely go to all local shops and all local Drive thru Mcdonalds 5 times a day. even just for a hot drink

80% of the women are very responsive, quick short burst of a chat, and

Then you see a hot chic and do the same thing, THEY ARE ALL THE SAME

Repetition is the mother of skill
 

SirBigBell

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I have missed so many opportunities with gorgeous women all because I wasn't quick enough on the uptake or didn't know what to say/do in the moment. I have lost count of the times I look back at an interaction and think "If only I'd said/done that..."

I'm not a nervous person, but I am more of a slow and methodical thinker and often find my mind goes blank whenever I'm on the spot. It happens in many circumstances, not just with women, and it's definitely one of the flaws that hold me back and I'd like to work on. When I first discovered pick up I would try to overcome this by rehearsing lines and routines, but it was always so fake and rarely fit the situations I found myself in.

Can anyone recommend any training or tips for basically speeding up my thought processes?
Im exactly like you in that respect.
Im more of a calculated thinker than a quick-witted chap who can reel off snappy sweet lines on the fly.

Like you, I used to see this as a weakness that needed to be fixed, until i realised that attempts to fix this took away from the authenticity of my character and presentation.
I wasnt broken so I didnt need fixing. I just needed to reposition myself correctly in the market and target the niche made for me.
So i avoid yappy chihuahuas (female versions of Chris Tucker in Rush Hour) and gravitate towards more chilled women. The moment i came to this realisation, my bang rate went up significantly and i enjoyed the company of the broads more, as i stopped feeling like i had to vocally keep up with chihuahuas all the time.

Accept how you are built and target the broads whose disposition suits your natural flow.
 

Mike32ct

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I run into that at work. I’m also a slow methodical “linear” thinker. Not a fast “debater” of sorts.

All that aside, I think EBR and SBB are on to something.

You can’t or shouldn’t “force” your brain to go “faster.” That will just (unnecessarily) put you into a nervous fight or flight mode. Your brain is likely already in the “right” mode.

Maybe purposely pause before you speak and let your analytical brain work in the mode it’s wired for.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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mrgoodstuff

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Im exactly like you in that respect.
Im more of a calculated thinker than a quick-witted chap who can reel off snappy sweet lines on the fly.

Like you, I used to see this as a weakness that needed to be fixed, until i realised that attempts to fix this took away from the authenticity of my character and presentation.
I wasnt broken so I didnt need fixing. I just needed to reposition myself correctly in the market and target the niche made for me.
So i avoid yappy chihuahuas (female versions of Chris Tucker in Rush Hour) and gravitate towards more chilled women. The moment i came to this realisation, my bang rate went up significantly and i enjoyed the company of the broads more, as i stopped feeling like i had to vocally keep up with chihuahuas all the time.

Accept how you are built and target the broads whose disposition suits your natural flow.
Very good illustration.
 

EyeBRollin

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I run into that at work. I’m also a slow methodical “linear” thinker. Not a fast “debater” of sorts.

All that aside, I think EBR and SBB are on to something.

You can’t or shouldn’t “force” your brain to go “faster.” That will just (unnecessarily) put you into a nervous fight or flight mode. Your brain is likely already in the “right” mode.

Maybe purposely pause before you speak and let your analytical brain work in the mode it’s wired for.
This is correct. In fact, people perceive men as stronger when they speak less. The value of what you say increases. Take it in. Digest. Breathe. Think. Speak
 

Jariel

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Thanks for the responses guys. Good to know I'm not alone in this and I'll take all the advice on board.

I usually do well in a date setting, sat down engaging in one on one conversation, but I've always been lousy at cold openers. I work in hospitality so it's always been a great place to meet hot women. A lot of the time they are the ones who initiate the conversation and flirting, but I constantly find my mind goes blank and I get stuck for things to say (until it's too late). It's so frustrating when I think of the missed opportunities, if only I'd acted on them.
 
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