"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Another one bites the dust; I date 'em, the next guy marries them
- Thread starter STR8UP
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
T Dog
Master Don Juan
I have had this happen to me as well. I have thought long and hard about it and have many ideas and theories, but when I try to write them out, I can’t consolidate my ideas.
I think it is partly because the DJ rules allows a girl to project the kind of guy she wants us to be, onto us.
Ultimately, the divide between who they want us to be (consciously and unconsciously) and who we really are becomes clear.
The new guy isn’t as grounded or confident as us and will conform to her wants and needs, total AFC.
Honestly, do you think she is entering a health relationship with the new guy when they only just left you (or you left them)?
I agree.T Dog said:
From my observations of these women after the fact, it seems that these guys are simply AFC's who are out there just WAITING for the right situation to come along where a girl is fed up that the man she truly wants won't commit.
I am having dinner with one tomorrow night (no flames, please) so I'm curious to find out about the hubby. She described him very favorably the few times we have talked about him, but I'm really curious what her motivations were.
T Dog
Master Don Juan
What happened on the date?
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Got a myspace message from a friend of my ex g/f's who I always thought was cool, but her and her husband moved back up north so I haven't seen them in awhile.
Anyway, I thought it was kind of odd that she would be contacting me, so I pulled up my exes myspace just for the hell of it (I do that every six months or so out of curiosity) and lo and behold.....my ex is GETTING MARRIED. I'm assuming it's to the guy she got with right after we broke up, the one with whom she put on a show making out with him in the club right in front of me.
So............since I started this thread, this makes TWO more women from my past who are getting hitched.
This basically means that ALL of my LTRs have married the next guy that came along, in addition to a couple of STR's and at least one FB
Strange indeed.
DavenJuan
Master Don Juan
the most recent one was with a girl i was with for 4 yrs. she NEVER mentioned marriage. about 1 month after we broke up "completely" she was engaged and got married 3 months thereafter.
Last Man Standing
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The greatest truths are expressed in their simplest form - for best understanding!!eyedogg said:
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
ThunderMaverick
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!!!!!!!
Last Man Standing
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Exclamation points merely pronounce the severity of the situation!!!ThunderMaverick said:
Aren't they ALL ready, willing, and able to get married?eyedogg said:
Most of them are anyway. Maybe I'm attracting the ones who REALLY want to get married. But as someone else mentioned, some of these women never so much as mentioned it to me, then they end up marrying the next guy.
Epic
Senior Don Juan
squirrels
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So the next guy who comes along...BAM!
The thing is, if YOU are the next guy to come along, you somehow resist the marriage impulse. She WOULD marry you if you'd chump up enough to give into her irrational pair-bonding desire. Of course, shes' more interested in marriage than in YOU, and in a lot of cases it'll just lead to common misery and apathy if you give into it.
But because you DON'T, she dumps you and moves on to the next guy.
And I think a lot of people SERIOUSLY underestimate the number of MEN out there who are under social pressure to get married. Sure, most men ACT macho, but there are a LOT of them out there who just want to hook up with a girl...because they believe they're not good enough to go after what they WANT and had better hook up when they have the chance.
In short...I wouldn't worry too much about it.
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.