Anger towards ex...

[Chamber36]

Even though I know that all the bitchy behavior was caused by the fact she perceived weakness in me or that I didnt appreciate her when she showed me vulnerability, I am still angry.

As I read material to rebuild the frame which was demolished along with that relationship (she used the fact I had a court case outside the relationship to ****-test me constantly within the relationship), I get fantasy images of smashing her face into a toilet seat. Sometimes I also wonder whether to contact her, tell her I understand what happened, ask her how she is doing, insult her or something (I just need to prove to myself she aint shi+, as she used the fact I felt weak due to this court case to convince herself I aint shi+).

I mean I can comprehend what's going on somehow, but I feel I am only scratching the surface here. I have deepseated anger, although as time goes by it does become less. Need to get this off my chest.

See, for me to re-enter the game I have to believe I am giving women something and being an addition to their lives. As I have been subsequently gaslit and ridiculed by her as well, I find it hard to be completely zen and trust myself to be the devourer that women want me to be.

I believe I have to let the pain go, possibly become indifferent to the betrayal, grow stronger than the pain I have felt and be as close to a loving protecting sexual being that I can be.

It involves not caring about anything that's happened in the past, but also it involves understanding everything that's happened in the past. Which includes coming back to my true self and not identifying with all the evil OR weak things I had been out to be during my most difficult and trying moments in which I was the most vulnerable.

It's quite hilarious when you see it somewhat clearly. Just a shame I still get the visions and the flashbacks.

Any of you guys able to relate?

 

[John Constantine]

Never ever contact her. Block her if you need to. Trust me on this one.
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Take time if you need to, you’re in no rush to get back in the game atm. Hit the gym, rebuild your self esteem by doing things that makes you proud and do them consistently, try to stay away from alcohol. Improve yourself, be better and learn from your mistakes. Once you feel like yourself again and your confidence builds up you can get back in the game gradually.
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Truth is if you try to get back in the game too soon, the results are not gonna be good and your self esteem will suffer even more. You need to get back into the right mindset before
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The gym will help with the anger and boost your self esteem.
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and again : NEVER EVER TEXT HER

 

[Chamber36]

Never ever contact her. Block her if you need to. Trust me on this one.
-
Take time if you need to, you’re in no rush to get back in the game atm. Hit the gym, rebuild your self esteem by doing things that makes you proud and do them consistently, try to stay away from alcohol. Improve yourself, be better and learn from your mistakes. Once you feel like yourself again and your confidence builds up you can get back in the game gradually.
-
Truth is if you try to get back in the game too soon, the results are not gonna be good and your self esteem will suffer even more. You need to get back into the right mindset before
-
The gym will help with the anger and boost your self esteem.
-
and again : NEVER EVER TEXT HER

I really appreciate this advice.

I do want to re-enter the game though, it's been a year. I might want to read a few more books though, so I agree. I am still angry and thus vulnerable. The weakness might indeed be perceived and I would be double fvcked again.

I started cold showers around christmas time and this finally got me out of being 100% coping. Also I work out every day and soon as the gyms open I will be back in there doing MMA and the likes.

How long am I supposed to stay out of the game for? Im about to finish 3% man, then im gonna reread David Deida, then possibly reread "The Game", meanwhile also gonna finish Ayn Rand Atlas Shrugged, may possibly read Power vs Force if and when im ready and I believe Meditations by Marcus Aurelius will help me to accept the past and enjoy the grind and women.

I been out of the game about a year like I said and have just been sitting depressed hating myself. Cold showers have done wonders and are allowing me to find strength within myself that I can connect to something righteous.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

If you are still angry that means you haven't moved on yet. I get it. It's hard sometimes. But there is nothing you can do about the past now. Forgive her and move forward. Not because she deserves it but because it clears her out of your mind, let's you move forward and allows you to think clearly towards your present and your future.

 

[Chamber36]

I can only truly forget this when I have become so strong that everything that happened could never happen to me again, that I could overcome such risky cirumstances.

I remember times when I could understand women so well they would become angry, when I gave them a look of understanding, smiled and remained in my calm energy, they would cry and sometimes even thank me.

I would be scared ****less to try this kind of "woman whispering" again, but I mean, I had it in me. I just approached the wrong woman and got a case.

I want to get back to that level, even though it's dangerous. I want to be that calm alpha male that sees through the womans pain and is able to absorb it.

It's just going to be a while. Haha

 

[John Constantine]

I can only truly forget this when I have become so strong that everything that happened could never happen to me again, that I could overcome such risky cirumstances.

I remember times when I could understand women so well they would become angry, when I gave them a look of understanding, smiled and remained in my calm energy, they would cry and sometimes even thank me.

I would be scared ****less to try this kind of "woman whispering" again, but I mean, I had it in me. I just approached the wrong woman and got a case.

I want to get back to that level, even though it's dangerous. I want to be that calm alpha male that sees through the womans pain and is able to absorb it.

It's just going to be a while. Haha

Every man experience at least one woman that completely destroys them. It’s a rite of passage and you’ll keep relieving the same thing until you make the adjustments you need to make.
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I’ve read how to be a 3% male, the book of pook and a whole lot of books. It’s good, but you need to apply what you learn and sometimes too much information does no good.
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The game and everything about it is simply a mindset. These were the steps I personally took after my last bad breakup.



step 1: rebuild your self esteem by hitting the gym, and accomplishing things that empowers you.

Step 2: start with approaching/texting woman a bit less beautiful than you normally would

Step 3: build a roster of 2 girls minimum and DONT COMMIT to an exclusive relationship until the abundance mindset comes back.

Step 4: now that you have a roster, start replacing the hb6 ish with better looking woman and so on. If the goal is an ltr then someone else might be of better help than me.
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I believe in you king, now pick up that crown back and get to work

 

[Chamber36]

Thank you.

I find your advice very concrete, constructive and in line with values of character.

It may do me well to meditate and to consider other peoples' experiences of life on this planet.

At least I am not alone.

I may indeed not be ready to play the field. I may just check it out, go on the town to make a chit-chat, see if I can brighten someone's day up or something. See how the other people feel.

 

[bat soup]

Even though I know that all the bitchy behavior was caused by the fact she perceived weakness in me or that I didnt appreciate her when she showed me vulnerability, I am still angry.

As I read material to rebuild the frame which was demolished along with that relationship (she used the fact I had a court case outside the relationship to ****-test me constantly within the relationship), I get fantasy images of smashing her face into a toilet seat. Sometimes I also wonder whether to contact her, tell her I understand what happened, ask her how she is doing, insult her or something (I just need to prove to myself she aint shi+, as she used the fact I felt weak due to this court case to convince herself I aint shi+).

I mean I can comprehend what's going on somehow, but I feel I am only scratching the surface here. I have deepseated anger, although as time goes by it does become less. Need to get this off my chest.

See, for me to re-enter the game I have to believe I am giving women something and being an addition to their lives. As I have been subsequently gaslit and ridiculed by her as well, I find it hard to be completely zen and trust myself to be the devourer that women want me to be.

I believe I have to let the pain go, possibly become indifferent to the betrayal, grow stronger than the pain I have felt and be as close to a loving protecting sexual being that I can be.

It involves not caring about anything that's happened in the past, but also it involves understanding everything that's happened in the past. Which includes coming back to my true self and not identifying with all the evil OR weak things I had been out to be during my most difficult and trying moments in which I was the most vulnerable.

It's quite hilarious when you see it somewhat clearly. Just a shame I still get the visions and the flashbacks.

Any of you guys able to relate?

She is just one woman. And if she's not cooperating anymore, then she's neither relevant or important.