And she said " you're so intense "

[unixguy]

I was at the club chlling last night with some friends. And I went to talk to talk to this girl that I found to be attactive. After talking to her for a while about just this and that and a few dances she tells me " you're so intense".

I asked her what is that supposed to mean? she said " I don't know there is just something about you , you are just so intense i can see it your eyes".

And that was all that was said ..

any thoughts?

 

[Golden Arms]

I dunno dude, so what hapenned after that ?

 

[MisterAl]

The intense comment is a good thing. I've gotten that before. She said to you, "My IL in you is quite high. Please ask me for my home telephone number."

Sooooo.......

How many days will you be waiting before you call her to set the first date?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by MisterAl
The intense comment is a good thing. I've gotten that before. She said to you, "My IL in you is quite high. Please ask me for my home telephone number."

Sooooo.......

How many days will you be waiting before you call her to set the first date?

I'll also add that she meant that you have good control of yourself and you are not easily read as many AFCs. Basically, you are in the drivers seat and she can only follow your lead.

 

[unixguy]

After that we talked for a while as good as we could in the club nothing too deep or anything just club talk. I did get her home and cell # and she made it a point to tell me she will be back out saturday.

So I was thinking of calling Saturday around 12 and seeing if she wants to go have some pre-club drinks.

What really got me here is that this is the fist time I have ever had a girl tell me this.

Kind of makes me wonder. About how different girls take this kind of thing. If i am always intense it can work for me or against me depending on how mentaly strong the girl is.


-unixguy

 

[MisterAl]

I suggest that you not go to the club with her this Saturday evening. I'd call her probably tonight to ask her out and make solid plans for a lunch/drinks/ice cream/coffee date on a weekday or weeknight next week. Then get off the damn phone.

At the club you will have to compete harder for her attention. Getting her drinks _before_ you go out clubbing again at the same place isn't the right plan. Why put alcohol in her to get her socially uninhibited for _other_people_? Makes no sense to me.

This Saturday go to a different club and get different numbers.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by unixguy
Kind of makes me wonder. About how different girls take this kind of thing. If i am always intense it can work for me or against me depending on how mentaly strong the girl is.


-unixguy

Why don't you make it easy for yourself and decide what kind of women you want to persue. If you want one that is mentally strong fine, keep up what you are doing. If you want the oposite, do something else. Don't feel that you need to adjust for everyone, pick YOUR line and follow it.

 

[Mikeman!]

It could be that you don't smile/laugh much...

 

[bp1974]

Being intense is good, and can be a big turn on. It's important to balance it with warmth, smiles and humour too. Intense on its own gets boring.

 

[R19]

I was in a meeting a couple weeks ago and my managing director conveyed to me that I was intense, more than most people he has worked with. This is not the first time that this has happened in a professional setting. At first I thought BFD, but then it hit me...

I have had girls comment that I was intense at some point or other in situations that turned out good and bad. I have gotten comments like 'you're intense' vs. 'you're soooooooooo intense.

I think that intensity is an attractive masculine trait, that is a huge positive when mixed with the actions of a DJ. Intense and AFC do not mix = stalker or something like that. It is massive incongruence.

How do you manage your intensity? It is very difficult to be in a high performance area professionally and then tone down all that goes with it if your success and survival is dependent on those traits. This is similar to the what brilliant people face when they go out they are likely to be top draw in 'book smarts' and outgunned in 'street smarts' and social skills.

 

[Apocalypse Now]

Like others said, I think "intense" is a very good quality, but it must be balanced. Charles Manson, for example, is on the extreme side of intensity.