"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Analogy -predators and prey

Mr.Positive

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I've had the eye-opening experience of working in law enforcement for a short period of time, in the ghetto.

When you work in law enforcement, you are taught that there are predators, yes true predators out there (wolves) and prey (sheep). In law enforcement, your job is that of the sheepdog, you protect the sheep from the wolves. You patrol around with a keen eye observing the sheep going about their daily lives, but you, are on a constant lookout for the wolves. Most people have no idea what is going on around them, but the wolves do, and wolves live their life preying on the sheep. My hat goes off to anyone that works in law enforcement, because it is the toughest of the tough jobs out there.

The PUA "player" is the wolf of the mating game, just as there are female wolves as we know. The AFC's are the sheep. The PUA preys on AFC's. The PUA manipulates people to gain an advantage and gain what they want, thus destroying marriages, creating emotional baggage, and hurting others in the process.

As a DJ, you must be above that. You must be the sheepdog. You must patrol around and be able to spot the wolves out there, both male and female. As a DJ, you are armed with knowledge that seperates you from the sheep, and thus you are the sheepdog now. As a sheepdog, you are a man of value, in the highest of demand...protect the sheep around you. Protect your AFC buddy if a female wolf is preying on him. Protect a friend's wife, or girlfiend, from wolves.

You have two choices, be a sheepdog, or become a wolf. Live your life as a man of value, be the sheepdog.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Vulpine

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Your analogy has a void.

There is no shepherd.

Without a shepherd, the sheepdogs (being of the same make as the wolf) join in preying on the sheep as well.

Or, they chase off the wolves and assume the function of predator.

Which has been known to happen with law enforcement types as well.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Vulpine

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Mr.Positive said:
As a DJ, you must be above that. You must be the sheepdog. You must patrol around and be able to spot the wolves out there, both male and female. As a DJ, you are armed with knowledge that seperates you from the sheep, and thus you are the sheepdog now. As a sheepdog, you are a man of value, in the highest of demand...protect the sheep around you. Protect your AFC buddy if a female wolf is preying on him. Protect a friend's wife, or girlfiend, from wolves.

You have two choices, be a sheepdog, or become a wolf. Live your life as a man of value, be the sheepdog.

I don't have to protect anyone but myself.

People will jump off cliffs like lemmings once they see the crowd moving that way. Get in front of that stampede, and you'll get trampled. Being above it means grow some wings and fly above that business like a hawk or eagle; snatching from the herd and carrying them off to your nest high above the chaos.

Oops... got a little carried away by myself, there.
 

synergy1

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the wolf/ sheep model is binary; the mosaic of human interaction is hardly that. Humans are a pack species governed by laws which suit the best interest of the group. The closest model describing rational human behavior is game theory, but even that breaks down in the face of illogical choices.
 

Mr.Positive

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joekerr31 said:
god is the shephard, if you believe in god.
You're a sharp guy Joekerr!!

The wolf/sheep model is binary, and definitely has a rescue/savior theme. It's something that's been on my mind for quite awhile actually, and has more to do with an "inner animal" type of thing. It's more of who you are at the core level, and how you react without the benefit of making conscious choices.

It doesn't have anything to do with women actually, just didn't want it to be moved to anything else...:)
 

dr_devious

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The model is too simplistic, at least in the worldly wider sense that categorizes everyone as wolves and sheep. A lot of people are somewhere between the two - how many people are hardened, predatory criminals (i.e. the wolves) and how many are at the other end of the spectrum and defenceless (i.e. sheep)? This is BS, some people (me included) are in the middle,not predators but know how to handle themselves when they need to.
I agree with the allegory in the DJ world, some at one end are predatory (e.g. PUAs) and quite a lot are sheep (e.g. AFCs)
 
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