I hope this is the right topic to post this on. My first post on here and only a few months into being red pill aware. I was a super simp blue pill beta. My exgf left me towards the end of March. She used the COVID lockdown for "needing space". I went for an emotional rollercoaster ride. It brought on feeling I had buried from my divorce. (Back story: By the time I filed for divorce, I couldn't stand wife. I did not have the attachment struggle with it.) It felt like everything I should have felt going through my divorce. Anyways it broke my ego, I started with all self help book, therapist, etc etc. I had barely talked to her over those months. Other than trying the "how to text your ex back" moves. She texted me in June 18 and told me to remove her from my calendar (which I had forgotten I linked her to it). That she no longer cared and to delete her from my life. By this time I had been through How to be a 3% Man a couple of times. I was able to hold my center, responded to her accordingly and left the door open. Yesterday she accepted a friend request from me that I sent to her back when all the **** was going down. I am looking to play this right. I currently have 2 plates spinning and 3 more I am just starting to work on. I am not going back to how I was. I would be lying though if I said I did care for her still. Am I reading too much into this? Is this her subtle way of opening the door back up? I looked at her page and it appears that she's in the hospital right now with complications from a surgery. That's tugging on them old feelings, and makes me want to send a pm to check on her. The other part just says ignore it, pretend like you are too busy to notice she accepted the request. If you are still reading after all of that...what is your opinion?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Am I reading too much into this...
- Thread starter jem
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
redskinsfan92
Master Don Juan
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- Jun 18, 2018
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"It is always time and effort better spent developing new, fresh, prospective women than it will ever be in attempting to reconstruct a failed relationship. Never root through the trash once the garbage has been dragged to the curb. You get messy, your neighbors see you do it, and what you thought was worth digging for is never as valuable as you thought it was." -Rollo Tomassi
backseatjuan
Banned
Delete that btch from your life.
lamath
Master Don Juan
You are overthinking......
This thread is proof that you are not over her. Ask yourself the question why you would want someone who did not want you?
Most of the time its your Ego playing trick on you, because she left you and it made you feel like crap now you think the best way to feel better is to get her back.....
It is not, if it dont work you will sink lower and lower into despair and if it does it will only make you feel better temporary,
This thread is proof that you are not over her. Ask yourself the question why you would want someone who did not want you?
Most of the time its your Ego playing trick on you, because she left you and it made you feel like crap now you think the best way to feel better is to get her back.....
It is not, if it dont work you will sink lower and lower into despair and if it does it will only make you feel better temporary,
Do nothing. Do not go see her do not reach out to her at all. She ended it. Told you to unlink with her and walked away, now She is dead to you. Dead metaphysically. Mentally gone to you aka no longer therw
If she ever reaches out to you the only thing you ever ever ever say to her is this
"Hey sally sorry im too busy right now. I have an awful lot on the go. If things ever free up maybe ill give you a call ( then you never do.) Take care
Then you hang up or walk away. You are always too busy for her from now on
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I have stop pursuing her. The friend request was something that I sent several months back. I have had zero contact in these few months. I didn't close the door because I had became aware of how I was being. Now seeing every **** test and sign that I was given, then it would be a different story. But I could just be deluding myself too.
backseatjuan
Banned
You basically sitting there and waiting for her to come back to you, because somewhere you discovered some jedi tactics like no contact, etc.
You should however have zero memory of her and be fcking other girls, a plate is a girl you fcking already, a prospect is a girl you haven't fcked yet, so you should have several plates that you are fcking. If you are a long term type of dude that means you still spin your plates and pick the best from the once that chase you.
The btch you talking about will never come back. If she does you should make her lick your ass before she ever gets to suck your dck and then kick her out back on the curb.
You should however have zero memory of her and be fcking other girls, a plate is a girl you fcking already, a prospect is a girl you haven't fcked yet, so you should have several plates that you are fcking. If you are a long term type of dude that means you still spin your plates and pick the best from the once that chase you.
The btch you talking about will never come back. If she does you should make her lick your ass before she ever gets to suck your dck and then kick her out back on the curb.