Am I making right decision? Confused please help

[tryst type]

Girl I've been dating wants to drive 5 hours to meet with a boy she's had strong feelings for and cheated on her previous bf with once.

They met online and talked for years, she's only met him twice in real life due to distance. He'll be around (5 hours away as oppose to 15)

Once I heard of this I told her I didn't want to see her anymore if she's willing to drive 5 hours put in the time/effort/energy for a "friend" especially one she's had strong feelings for and cheated on ex with.

She claims she's just friendly and has no feelings for him in that sense. she also said she wouldn't go in which i replied that it still doesn't change anything, her initial reasons for without hesitation agreeing to would still be present and i had already felt she was disloyal.

Am I over reacting here?

 

[Zodiac]

No your not. Sounds like she wants to do what she always does. I hope she doesn't for your sake but if she does; leave.

 

[tryst type]

even if she doesn't go, i still feel her original decision justifies suspicion that i can't shake. she'd not be going for me not because she thinks it'd be a bad idea to our relationship

 

[tryst type]

She keeps fighting for me claiming she had no harmful intentions. Worth giving her a chance?

 

[tick37]

Personally I'd put my foot down and make her fight for me. If she doesn't fight, then she's not worth having.

 

[osu13]

I would tell her that I was going to meet up with an old girlfriend while she did that

 

[JackPrescott]

Girl I've been dating wants to drive 5 hours to meet with a boy she's had strong feelings for and cheated on her previous bf with once.

They met online and talked for years, she's only met him twice in real life due to distance. He'll be around (5 hours away as oppose to 15)

Once I heard of this I told her I didn't want to see her anymore if she's willing to drive 5 hours put in the time/effort/energy for a "friend" especially one she's had strong feelings for and cheated on ex with.

She claims she's just friendly and has no feelings for him in that sense. she also said she wouldn't go in which i replied that it still doesn't change anything, her initial reasons for without hesitation agreeing to would still be present and i had already felt she was disloyal.

Am I over reacting here?

Just buy her a black thong from Victoria's Secret, and some scented "massage oil" and a few packs of condoms and send her on her way!

 

[KontrollerX]

Nope.

You're not overreacting at all.

You've made the right decision to get rid of her.

She wants to fvck this guy so let her.

You won't be there for her when she gets back.

These are called negative consequences and if a chick doesn't get enough of them in her life for bad behaviour she'll think everything she does is ok.

 

[sav]

i wonder what kind of response she was looking from u when she basically was saying she's gonna meet up with the guy and bang the **** out of him...

now if a girl i cared about pretty much said that.. i'd tell her to go for it... then when she came back i wouldnt be around... simple as that... u cant keep a woman tied down.. she has to tie herself down to you.. its the only way it works.. seems this one is a lost cause...

i mean, logically, would you drive out 5 hours to meet a girl and not think about banging her? NO... i mean, does this girl take you for a fool? the audacity of women these days..

 

[tryst type]

Exactly. The 5 hour drive is what's making this unbelievable and hard to comprehend. She kept fighting for me through texts today and I repeatedly proved my point. She asked to please meet up tonight so she can show me how much she cares and explain better. Should I?

 

[tick37]

A woman doesn't cheat unless she has a reason. Are you being too AFC with her?

 

[KontrollerX]

Yeah.

Meetup fvck her brains out and then say again "if you go to see that guy we are done".

Perfect ending to a perfect night.

 

[Vendetta081789]

I'm starting to like KontrollerX, because we seem to tend to be on the same page.

My only addition to the things he has said is this:

If you decide to stay with her, don't attach yourself just yet. No matter how strongly she says she feels about you, don't get caught in the spiders web. She's cheated before, and there is a possibility she will do it again. Just stay detached for a while, and keep a keen eye out for suspicious behavior. If everything stays fine for a while, you then face the decision to take a chance and get down and dirty in a LTR, or next'ing her because of the so called suspicion you can't shake.

 

[tryst type]

Yeah.

Meetup fvck her brains out and then say again "if you go to see that guy we are done".

Perfect ending to a perfect night.

ha nice. thing is she has already said she won't go see him. issue i'm dealing with now is her initial response was that she would, with no hesitation. she changed her mind after i questioned it but doesn't mean she really never wanted to.

eh i guess i'll see what's up considering she technically didn't do anything incriminating yet. she knows i have 0 zolerance for bs behavior, i've been straight about my attitude towards shady girls from the get-go.

here's something interesting last night during the launch of this dilemma she stated "i've never been spoken to before the way you are talking to me" i asked what she meant and she responded "i just dont know how to respond to you or make you believe me, you're too firm about your opinions"

i liked hearing that ha

 

[DonJuan11]

She claims she's just friendly and has no feelings for him in that sense. she also said she wouldn't go in

Tell her you would like to go with her. If she balks, give her a ticket to ride!

 

[KontrollerX]

Keep that "firmness" up too tryst type.

LOL, man that sounded gay or like a d!ck joke ahahaha.

Seriously though man that is the right attitude to keep.

These chicks never stop trying to break a man down so you have to never stop being the man because this is kind of what turns them on and keeps them interested. You being a man and she being a chick etc.

Anyway its nice to hear she is supposedly calling this meeting off but remember with shady tricky chickies they will try and appease a boyfriend they are trying to keep with lies and then go do behind their boyfriends back what they told him upfront they were going to do to begin with.

So yeah the whole thing about supposedly not seeing this guy now could be one big setup and a lie so pay attention to any mysterious vacations or sudden family outings with her 2nd cousin's family or whatever the fvck excuse she makes to have to go away for a few days suddenly.

 

[tryst type]

yeah definetly Kontroller i'm with you on that. thing is most people think im jealous in a sense for this type of behavior but its the deception that kills me, if she wants to **** some guy so be it, just be honest so i can stop putting in time and effort into a fake relationship.

but these girls, they don't get it ha

 

[Sandow]

jealousy is acting insecure for no good reason. But this is a huge red flag, so acting out is a must in your situation. Sorry, but no way can you trust this girl. You have to draw the line somwwhere dude. Btw I wouldnt consider dating this girl after this.

 

[Faded Image]

A woman doesn't cheat unless she has a reason. Are you being too AFC with her?

Even if a guy isn't AFC he could be cheated on. You could be the smoothest DJ to ever walk the earth and be cheated on.

If she has a desire to cheat, she's going to cheat. If she's cheated on one of her Xs with guy in the past, she'll do it again.

Driving five hours is like driving from Fayetteville, NC to Atlanta, GA. What girl in her right mind would drive that far to just to see a guy and nothing else?

Think about it.

 

[tick37]

Even if a guy isn't AFC he could be cheated on. You could be the smoothest DJ to ever walk the earth and be cheated on.

If she has a desire to cheat, she's going to cheat. If she's cheated on one of her Xs with guy in the past, she'll do it again.

Driving five hours is like driving from Fayetteville, NC to Atlanta, GA. What girl in her right mind would drive that far to just to see a guy and nothing else?

Think about it.

Yea, I didn't read much into the previous cheating she had done. She doesn't have a good track record.