Hey guys, new poster here 
So I've been friends (sigh*) with this girl for a few years now, but I didn't see her in a compatible kind of way until about a year ago. We're in a close group but we weren't ever close in the "tell each other real personal stuff" kind of way either. We just hung out because our group is close and we did a lot of things together.
It wasn't until last year when she changed herself to become more girly (she used to dress a little bit like a tomboy, jeans nice top etc) and started wearing dresses more often did I finally notice her and she got the attention of other guys too. Honestly, I didn't notice her until I found out this guy liked her and she kinda liked him too which got me a little jealous. Took me about 6months to figure out if what I felt was real or not and decided it was.
Anyway, we'd used to go clubbing together (with the rest of my group) but we didn't ever really interact a whole lot (other than talk and drink), but it wasn't until a few months ago did she start holding my hand when she wanted to go to other areas of the club, like the bar and stuff. a few times, she tried to fix my hair when it was a little messed up. Last time we went clubbing she led me round the club with our hands interlocking at the fingers. A few times I've tried to sort of loosen up to let her go but she just tightened her grip and sometimes she would tighten her grip anyway.
Thing is, other signs point to her seeing me as a brother. On my birthday while having a shot, she goes "Happy Birthday Brother!" Maybe I'm in denial, but sometimes I feel like she's saying it not because there's no chemistry but because she's too scared to change the dynamics of our relationship because of what our friends would think. She's never been in a serious relationship, so I think she may also be too scared to get into one with me.
I'm not sure exactly what I should do. I've tried my hardest before to not think of her in this way, but I've accepted the fact that I like her and would risk our friendship to get her. I'm a very humble, modest and unselfish guy but for once I want to be selfish. With her. I've thought about it and for me, i think the best option is to break down our friendship (not to the ground obviously) and build it back up to one where she could see me as someone more compatible.
Thoughts? Maybe I'm just lying to myself. If anyone thinks I'm in total denial and can't see the forest around the tree and that I have no chance, please say so.
So I've been friends (sigh*) with this girl for a few years now, but I didn't see her in a compatible kind of way until about a year ago. We're in a close group but we weren't ever close in the "tell each other real personal stuff" kind of way either. We just hung out because our group is close and we did a lot of things together.
It wasn't until last year when she changed herself to become more girly (she used to dress a little bit like a tomboy, jeans nice top etc) and started wearing dresses more often did I finally notice her and she got the attention of other guys too. Honestly, I didn't notice her until I found out this guy liked her and she kinda liked him too which got me a little jealous. Took me about 6months to figure out if what I felt was real or not and decided it was.
Anyway, we'd used to go clubbing together (with the rest of my group) but we didn't ever really interact a whole lot (other than talk and drink), but it wasn't until a few months ago did she start holding my hand when she wanted to go to other areas of the club, like the bar and stuff. a few times, she tried to fix my hair when it was a little messed up. Last time we went clubbing she led me round the club with our hands interlocking at the fingers. A few times I've tried to sort of loosen up to let her go but she just tightened her grip and sometimes she would tighten her grip anyway.
Thing is, other signs point to her seeing me as a brother. On my birthday while having a shot, she goes "Happy Birthday Brother!" Maybe I'm in denial, but sometimes I feel like she's saying it not because there's no chemistry but because she's too scared to change the dynamics of our relationship because of what our friends would think. She's never been in a serious relationship, so I think she may also be too scared to get into one with me.
I'm not sure exactly what I should do. I've tried my hardest before to not think of her in this way, but I've accepted the fact that I like her and would risk our friendship to get her. I'm a very humble, modest and unselfish guy but for once I want to be selfish. With her. I've thought about it and for me, i think the best option is to break down our friendship (not to the ground obviously) and build it back up to one where she could see me as someone more compatible.
Thoughts? Maybe I'm just lying to myself. If anyone thinks I'm in total denial and can't see the forest around the tree and that I have no chance, please say so.