Am I doing the right thing?

[sozzz]

Been with a 30 yr old for a year now. I'm mid 20's and she's 30. So we're 4 or 5 yr apart.

we both care n love each other. The problems are...

-I have lost every job I had due to my medical problems and now I'm jobless and havent even finish school.

-She has a job but not even GED. We have talked and she said she's planning on getting her ged sometimes in march or this year.

But even then, after she got her ged and i got a job and finish school, I feel like my youth as a man is gone because I'll be 35 and she'll be 40 something. The sex and the intimacy will be gone as well. I'm not familiar with dating older women, thought somehow here could shed some light.

Not long ago, I did talk to her about marrying her and have kids together once we all financially stabled but I just don't see that happening for atleast 1 or 2 years from now. Not to mention by the time I have a stable job and got my act together, she'll be 36 or 37 and might not be able to have kids. Maybe she'll be able to but dam i feel i'm f*cking up her future and mine if we stay together.

I realized all of the things i typed and told her about it this morning, she started crying but denied it when i asked if she was crying. She later txted me saying I should leave her because she said i'm right and that i will still be young when she's in her 40's and i'll need a younger girl to keep me happy and satisfied...

I feel that if i leave I will hurt her, but if I don't leave, I will hurt us both... I don't know what I should do.

P.S I feel like I should join the macking on HBs bandwagon like the rest of people on here and dont jump into the relationship circle so soon. I guess every time I found someone new I can't seem to do it cuz it'll hurt them, because all the ones that are with me genuinely like me..

 

[Purefilth]

Doing what you want to do is the right thing to do most of the time.

You may nit get the desired results, but you will be living without regrets.



What is it you WANT to do?

 

[sozzz]

I feel the best thing to do is to break up and stay friends, but i doubt she'll want to talk or see me ever again let alone be friends.

I tell her to go back to her ex but she said she won't go back to him. I even said to go after the guys at work who want her, but she doesn't care about them. As weird as this may sound, I wouldn't mind if she cheats/find someone new right now, atleast I'll feel less guilty. I'd rather be hurt than having her be hurt. The worst that will happen to me is being dry for several months until i find someone new.

But for her, she's 30 now and doesn't have much time to find a guy, or do women able to find guys at that age? I just want her to find someone that is financially stable and can love her n take care of her like I can, then I'll be happy.

I can knock her up n have kids but then what, we're both f*cked.. I think the best thing right now is try n get her to cheat on me or somehow hope she finds another guy cuz I can't just tell her we breaking up. We're both in that serious zone in the relationship where it's hard.

Lesson learned, never get into a serious relationship with an older woman. If I was single again, I would just hit it and quick with all the girls I see. F*ck this commitment bs.

If there was a way for me to break up with her, I'd love to hear it. If it's just the typical " we should break up", I can't do it. I guess I'm weak. I know most guys wouldn't give a sh*t, but each is different.

Overall, the two reasons why I think me and her should break up are..

AGE
MONEY

If there are ways for me and her to work through those two things and still be happy then I'd love to hear it. But I don't think there's any way to work through those two things am I right?

 

[Purefilth]

I feel the best thing to do is to break up and stay friends, but i doubt she'll want to talk or see me ever again let alone be friends.

I tell her to go back to her ex but she said she won't go back to him. I even said to go after the guys at work who want her, but she doesn't care about them. As weird as this may sound, I wouldn't mind if she cheats/find someone new right now, atleast I'll feel less guilty. I'd rather be hurt than having her be hurt. The worst that will happen to me is being dry for several months until i find someone new.

But for her, she's 30 now and doesn't have much time to find a guy, or do women able to find guys at that age? I just want her to find someone that is financially stable and can love her n take care of her like I can, then I'll be happy.

I can knock her up n have kids but then what, we're both f*cked.. I think the best thing right now is try n get her to cheat on me or somehow hope she finds another guy cuz I can't just tell her we breaking up. We're both in that serious zone in the relationship where it's hard.

Lesson learned, never get into a serious relationship with an older woman. If I was single again, I would just hit it and quick with all the girls I see. F*ck this commitment bs.

If there was a way for me to break up with her, I'd love to hear it. If it's just the typical " we should break up", I can't do it. I guess I'm weak. I know most guys wouldn't give a sh*t, but each is different.

Overall, the two reasons why I think me and her should break up are..

AGE
MONEY

If there are ways for me and her to work through those two things and still be happy then I'd love to hear it. But I don't think there's any way to work through those two things am I right?

you are literally being a girl.

Girls waste time trying to get the guy to lose interest / do the breaking up.

You are also trying to alleviate the blame of the breakup onto Sosuave members by coaxing the answer that you want to hear.

Decide LIKE A MAN. then DO what you decide.

you have had no answers from anyone because they dont want to take responlibility for your breakup - if thats what you end up doing.

Either way decide fast - you claim to care about her, but she aint getting any younger if you're gonna drop her then do it like a man and stop wasting her time.

However from your posts - It looks like you have "Grass is greener" syndrome.

Has she displayed any sh!tty behaviour?

You havent mentioned any. So i'm guessing you're just bored of her / no longer attracted to her.

Its up to YOU to decide what YOU want, and DO whatever that may be bro.