"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Always Self-Conscious

M

Mox1

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I think the title speaks for itself. Ive been lurking on this site for a while, and I know its all about thinking positive and having an aura of confidence - but lately Ive gone in the opposite direction and I don't know how to stop it.

I know that I have plenty of things going for me in my life. I have career goals (I plan to go to grad school), I have hobbies, plenty of friends and acquiescence's, etc, but lately Ive become so intimidated and self-conscious around people I'm constantly trying to watch what I say, do...so I end up in the background, retreating from a lot of social interactions.

I think I'm starting to have a real problem, and I don't want to keep going down this path. My thoughts are constantly in the negative. The reasons why this has happened are entirely unclear to me, but I don't want to be like this.

I think I just need some words of inspiration...
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

T

tick37

Senior Don Juan
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Jan 18, 2008
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Do you know what self-confidence really means? People can't get it when they don't know what it is.

You've got to believe in yourself. You have to see value in yourself (I say it all the time now). You have to know that you are one of a kind and there is no one else like you. It's your life, and you own it. Make it the best, and don't take any less. Don't let other people define who you are. Don't talk in ways that say, "I'm not good enough," like saying, "please return my call". You will not get respect if you don't respect yourself.
 
O

oakraiderz2

Master Don Juan
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F*ck everybody, f*ck what they think...tell yourself that and believe it...thats what i did.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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