"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Alright DJs, I need your advice on this situation

like2jam

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 3, 2013
Messages
136
Reaction score
4
Ok, so I went out with this woman again for the third time over the weekend.

Had a decent time and even got naked with her and had some pretty intense intimacy with her. I ended up leaving pretty early in the AM, but I did not sleep over.

Before we had any drinks and after I got there, I knew for sure that I wasn't interested in her long term. She, on the other hand, is now coming on stronger than ever.

In fact, she's texting me every day since then. It's getting to be a bit much. I haven't told her specifically that I'm going on other dates with women, but I am. I haven't told her that I'm not, either.

She's definitely getting more serious and I'm pulling away.

So now, I'm trying to figure out a graceful exit strategy. I respect her, and she's really a nice person. I don't want to be mean or rude to her. I'm not sure how abrupt I need to make this though.

What do you guys do in this situation? What do you think is the most respectful and suave way of doing this? I mean, I could see her again and have more 'fun' with her, but not until she knows the score. That I don't see us working out long term. I have a number of reasons why. Some of them are too personal and would hurt her and would be cold, so I'll never tell her that.

I suppose I should man up and call her to discuss. Texting would be a lot easier, but it's also sort of taking the easy route. I've had a woman LJBF me via text once and it was hard. I was sort of pissed that it happened via text, but at the same time, it saved me from trying to chump talk her out of it. ( which I would have done 2 years ago when I was full on AFC )

Thoughts please.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

SingAgn

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2013
Messages
18
Reaction score
0
You might as well as get the talk out of the way. It sounds like you are trying to avoid it and it will happen again if you don't step up and let her down. It will help you in the future and since you admit to liking her, it might be the best thing for her too before she gets more attached.
 

WoodB

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 13, 2013
Messages
89
Reaction score
7
I understand the jam you are in. When I was a little younger, I found myself in similar situations; my willie led me to her quim, but my DJ radar told me there was no long term potential for various reasons. At times, it was the smell or taste of her quim, or other sundry matters such as her blubbery arse, sense of humor, shoddy dental work, or whatever. Here are some options I used to truly minimize hurting her feelings, for a true gentleman must always be condiderate.

1. Stop asking her out.

2. Ask her out for good companionship, but no sex.

There is no middle ground when the woman sn really into you but you are not, unless you are willing to use her and discard her, something which I will not do. DJs don't use women.
 

MikeOck

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 6, 2012
Messages
199
Reaction score
35
Location
MidAtlantic
I think you are a great girl but you should know that I'm not looking for anything serious right now. I do enjoy your company and would like to keep seeing you on a casual basis, but I don't want to give you the wrong idea.
Do it on the phone. Texting or emailing that stuff is cold in my opinion. If you had been seeing her longer I'd say do it in person, but three dates isn't long enough to require that.
 

Skyy.

Banned
Joined
Jul 1, 2013
Messages
59
Reaction score
13
'Im not looking for anything serious right now. I've had a great time with you and thought we could hang out more to get to know you better'
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Greasy Pig

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 22, 2009
Messages
1,675
Reaction score
102
Location
Australia
My stock standard is to wait till she brings up the "what are we?" question and then say: "Look, I'm a confirmed bachelor and I'm really not up for anything serious. I rate you too highly as a person to not be honest with you but that's the stage I'm at in my life right now. If you'd still like to hang out, that would be great."
 
Top