Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

After I quit my therapy

Blacksheep

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Some weeks ago I was really down, feeling miserable in a lot of aspects. Also I lost meaning for things in life.

So, after this post and several replies that I read here, I started to observe some stuffs that was making my symptoms worse like depressive, low self-esteem and feeling sad all the time.

One point was my therapy sessions, as the last ones every time I finished it I ended feeling so miserable all the time. And everything I said to my therapist he tried to prove how I was wrong. And I don't think this is the kind of support we need when we are depressed or sad about something. So, I got it as a redflag.

Made some researches and found a lot of people that has reported some similar issues and that scared me, because it was so much people.

So, it come a time when I decided to end up this service. And then I had the final proof. He tried everything to manipulate me and doesn't allow me to finish. I gave an excuse that I had no money, and he made some "offers" that was always the same, but spoken differently. After 5x time telling I want to quit it, he then accepted it... I had to be assertive saying that I've already made my decision and I wouldn't go back or argue anymore.

So, there was almost 3 weeks I quit my therapy and since then I can feel my self esteem come back, I'm not feeling a **** anymore and also become more confident again. Maybe even better than before.

It's feeling that I've regained control of my life. And would like to thank everyone who replied my last post, cause it really helped me understanding those problems and I'm gratefully for it. A tip from @Spaz that was very useful, was the one to focus on creating small winnings in life... It helps a lot when you're down.

For next steps I'm rearranging my values on the LTR I started when I started my therapy and need to think more about that to decide which way I follow. Cause even if I have feelings for this girl, I have strong disbeliefs about LTR's and knowing all the things I've learned from past experiences and some books, it's quite hard to invest on it. PS.: Also, reading Sex at Dawn makes me understand relationships in a whole different way.

In someways, even not accepting the restrictions that a woman tries to impose, I feel that I lose a freedom that I had choice on it (like deciding or not to see the person on some weekend and just have your time whenever you want, for example). Cause I know our freedom ends when it comes to the other's person freedom, and we are already slave to society rules. So I'm working on to get more clarity about that.
 

Jager

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Some weeks ago I was really down, feeling miserable in a lot of aspects. Also I lost meaning for things in life.

So, after this post and several replies that I read here, I started to observe some stuffs that was making my symptoms worse like depressive, low self-esteem and feeling sad all the time.

One point was my therapy sessions, as the last ones every time I finished it I ended feeling so miserable all the time. And everything I said to my therapist he tried to prove how I was wrong. And I don't think this is the kind of support we need when we are depressed or sad about something. So, I got it as a redflag.

Made some researches and found a lot of people that has reported some similar issues and that scared me, because it was so much people.

So, it come a time when I decided to end up this service. And then I had the final proof. He tried everything to manipulate me and doesn't allow me to finish. I gave an excuse that I had no money, and he made some "offers" that was always the same, but spoken differently. After 5x time telling I want to quit it, he then accepted it... I had to be assertive saying that I've already made my decision and I wouldn't go back or argue anymore.

So, there was almost 3 weeks I quit my therapy and since then I can feel my self esteem come back, I'm not feeling a **** anymore and also become more confident again. Maybe even better than before.

It's feeling that I've regained control of my life. And would like to thank everyone who replied my last post, cause it really helped me understanding those problems and I'm gratefully for it. A tip from @Spaz that was very useful, was the one to focus on creating small winnings in life... It helps a lot when you're down.

For next steps I'm rearranging my values on the LTR I started when I started my therapy and need to think more about that to decide which way I follow. Cause even if I have feelings for this girl, I have strong disbeliefs about LTR's and knowing all the things I've learned from past experiences and some books, it's quite hard to invest on it. PS.: Also, reading Sex at Dawn makes me understand relationships in a whole different way.

In someways, even not accepting the restrictions that a woman tries to impose, I feel that I lose a freedom that I had choice on it (like deciding or not to see the person on some weekend and just have your time whenever you want, for example). Cause I know our freedom ends when it comes to the other's person freedom, and we are already slave to society rules. So I'm working on to get more clarity about that.
Excellent. Things are looking up. That’s the kind of win I like to hear.

For your final comment:

It’s irrelevant what society wants you to do. There’s the law, but aside from that you are obligated to do nothing. Aside from money when it is borrowed, or a proper exchange of products or services, you don’t owe anyone a d@mn thing. Nothing. Live your own life by your own volition, with your own beliefs.

I’ll reiterate a final point. It is irrelevant what other people want you to do, or what they want you to believe. That’s your decision. No one else’s. Such is the way of a man that lives as an independent individual, and not a sheep or carbon copy of everyone else in this world. This is always the case, even when interacting with women.
 

Blacksheep

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Excellent. Things are looking up. That’s the kind of win I like to hear.

For your final comment:

It’s irrelevant what society wants you to do. There’s the law, but aside from that you are obligated to do nothing. Aside from money when it is borrowed, or a proper exchange of products or services, you don’t owe anyone a d@mn thing. Nothing. Live your own life by your own volition, with your own beliefs.

I’ll reiterate a final point. It is irrelevant what other people want you to do, or what they want you to believe. That’s your decision. No one else’s. Such is the way of a man that lives as an independent individual, and not a sheep or carbon copy of everyone else in this world. This is always the case, even when interacting with women.
It's a great point man! Thanks a lot!

I always has this kind of belief in my mind... but that was overshadowed when I was at therapy and I hear that: "We have to accept following our society and cultural ideas, cause otherwise we will all be isolated and alone." haha... now I can see that is was the biggest bull**** I've heard only to make me one more sheep in this crazy world.

Every day I live by my beliefs and walk the path there is sense and meaning for me I feel stronger again. I know there will be hard times, but knowing that I'm taking care of my life and assumed responsibility for my life is kind of freeing myself.
 

Jager

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It's a great point man! Thanks a lot!

I always has this kind of belief in my mind... but that was overshadowed when I was at therapy and I hear that: "We have to accept following our society and cultural ideas, cause otherwise we will all be isolated and alone." haha... now I can see that is was the biggest bull**** I've heard only to make me one more sheep in this crazy world.

Every day I live by my beliefs and walk the path there is sense and meaning for me I feel stronger again. I know there will be hard times, but knowing that I'm taking care of my life and assumed responsibility for my life is kind of freeing myself.
There’s a valuable lesson here, too. All the blue pill mentality is, is suppression. Suppression of man’s masculinity. Suppression of his individuality and independence. Suppression of his potential and capacity for greatness. Before I make my next point, here’s the definition of suppress, in the context of what I’m talking about. I emphasized the important parts of the definition:

Prevent the development, action, or expression of (a feeling, impulse, idea, etc.); restrain.

You’ve felt the effects of suppression. In the case of your therapist, your instance, you felt weaker, loss of hope and drive. You were, basically, told to knock it off and get with program of the rest of society. To be just like everyone else. He was suppressing you, as have others who tried to stop you from becoming something more, in a society built by feminists that doesn’t want people, especially men, to become more powerful.

When you abandoned that notion, you felt stronger, calmer, more sane. There’s calm now, in your mind, where before there was chaos. You are starting to be yourself again. Keep doing it!

Now, we come to the conclusion. A man was never meant to conform. He was always meant to be a free entity, with free will and uncompromising integrity of self. He was always meant to lead, not follow. Meant to be active and enterprising, driven and ambitious, for the survival of himself and others. Men lead mankind.
 
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Epic Days

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It's a great point man! Thanks a lot!

I always has this kind of belief in my mind... but that was overshadowed when I was at therapy and I hear that: "We have to accept following our society and cultural ideas, cause otherwise we will all be isolated and alone." haha... now I can see that is was the biggest bull**** I've heard only to make me one more sheep in this crazy world.

Every day I live by my beliefs and walk the path there is sense and meaning for me I feel stronger again. I know there will be hard times, but knowing that I'm taking care of my life and assumed responsibility for my life is kind of freeing myself.
Therapy is a failed field. It never really cured anyone of anything. Valuable lesson. Their idea is to conform to social norms and your issues stem from being uniquely outside of social constraints from a small to a high degree.
 

Focal core

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Most therapist has deep burried core trauma inside them, most of them being a theraphist just to prove people are wrong about them, and you won't believe this, they'll try to make u stay longer in their session giving them some relieved of their own emotional issues!!!

The key of finding a genuine therapist is the one who didn't judge you. The one who heal you within your heart.

A lots of doctors, therapist and nurses are nut job.

An Individuals who've not addressed and healed their core wounds at a primal/foundational level, are especially attracted to jobs or careers that involve psychological or medical intervention.

Psychotherapists, doctors and nurses are all drawn to helping or "fixing" people, as this forms the foundation of their self-worth, and provides opportunities to change someone in ways that were never possible to accomplish with their parent. The caregiver's appetite for omnipotence has germinated from early childhood. It was originally born out of a need to construct a more powerful, invincible and somewhat grandiose ego structure, to compensate for archaic deficits that left him/her feeling a sense of disempowerment or fragility.

Find a good ones don't give up when it comes to becoming an emotionally healthy whole person.
 
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Epic Days

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A lots of doctors, therapist and nurses are nut job.

An Individuals who've not addressed and healed their core wounds at a primal/foundational level, are especially attracted to jobs or careers that involve psychological or medical intervention.
This is true. Scary true. The worst trying to help those better off than them.
 

Blacksheep

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There’s a valuable lesson here, too. All the blue pill mentality is, is suppression. Suppression of man’s masculinity. Suppression of his individuality and independence. Suppression of his potential and capacity for greatness. Before I make my next point, here’s the definition of suppress, in the context of what I’m talking about. I emphasized the important parts of the definition:

Prevent the development, action, or expression of (a feeling, impulse, idea, etc.); restrain.

You’ve felt the effects of suppression. In the case of your therapist, your instance, you felt weaker, loss of hope and drive. You were, basically, told to knock it off and get with program of the rest of society. To be just like everyone else. He was suppressing you, as have others who tried to stop you from becoming something more, in a society built by feminists that doesn’t want people, especially men, to become more powerful.

When you abandoned that notion, you felt stronger, calmer, more sane. There’s calm now, in your mind, where before there was chaos. You are starting to be yourself again. Keep doing it!

Now, we come to the conclusion. A man was never meant to conform. He was always meant to be a free entity, with free will and uncompromising integrity of self. He was always meant to lead, not follow. Meant to be active and enterprising, driven and ambitious, for the survival of himself and others. Men lead mankind.

That's a biggest true!

One question: If society is built by feminists, how can men be successful and powerful? If you show that you are smart, have good ideas and start to got power and influence, people will try to knock you down. So how to be that and also avoid those negative things?

Also, I think I should be alone, like don't having any long-term relationship with women... but right now for example I still have a feeling for this girl I'm dating and feel sad when I think about breaking up and living my life alone. Is this a trap I'm doing inside my mind? I have a perception that she is different, but I can't believe in that... after all my experiences I can't believe that still exists a good woman out there. Or she really is a good and honest person, or she is really good at lying.
 

Blacksheep

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Therapy is a failed field. It never really cured anyone of anything. Valuable lesson. Their idea is to conform to social norms and your issues stem from being uniquely outside of social constraints from a small to a high degree.
Yes!

I heard it sometimes in my sessions... like "You have to accept and live by social rules and ideas, if you don't you'll be completely alone"

Logically we have to follow some rules, but the topics we were talking it was completely nonsense.
 

Blacksheep

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Most therapist has deep burried core trauma inside them, most of them being a theraphist just to prove people are wrong about them, and you won't believe this, they'll try to make u stay longer in their session giving them some relieved of their own emotional issues!!!

The key of finding a genuine therapist is the one who didn't judge you. The one who heal you within your heart.

A lots of doctors, therapist and nurses are nut job.

An Individuals who've not addressed and healed their core wounds at a primal/foundational level, are especially attracted to jobs or careers that involve psychological or medical intervention.

Psychotherapists, doctors and nurses are all drawn to helping or "fixing" people, as this forms the foundation of their self-worth, and provides opportunities to change someone in ways that were never possible to accomplish with their parent. The caregiver's appetite for omnipotence has germinated from early childhood. It was originally born out of a need to construct a more powerful, invincible and somewhat grandiose ego structure, to compensate for archaic deficits that left him/her feeling a sense of disempowerment or fragility.

Find a good ones don't give up when it comes to becoming an emotionally healthy whole person.
Maybe in the future I'm going to search for a new one, but I completely lost my trust on this kind of service... I'm working on find who I really are again, something it's still confused in my mind.

Those days I'm feeling a way better and it's really good... I'm enjoying this time and rearranging my life, giving a boost on my projects and studies.

Btw, thanks for your reply!
 

Epic Days

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One question: If society is built by feminists, how can men be successful and powerful? If you show that you are smart, have good ideas and start to got power and influence, people will try to knock you down. So how to be that and also avoid those negative things?
That my friend is an excellent question. And more importantly, the right question. Impressive really.

That exact point is your personal make/break point. Because I was a third baseman I will use that.
A ground ball headed for the gap. I cut it off and pivot to throw to the second basemen who is almost to the bag for a double play.

How I pivot is everything!!! When I was new at it I had to drill it over and over. Low bounces and high bounces. Over and over until I was CERTAIN. Certainty is everything in life. Be certain and steadfast.

How you pivot on the go is important because it can work against your momentum or actually speed it up. Grace under fire. You have to make the pivot like you mean it.

You catch the suppression and recognize exactly what it is. A squelch of your life force and intent to subdue you. This is the feminine imperative at its core. The crush of a man’s spirit and soul. There is no reprieve. There is no mercy.

Pivot with momentum and don’t look back. If it seems impossible, it’s the perfect goal for you.
 

DelayedGratification

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A female texting-buddy (from OLD of all things, but turns out she lives in Mexico so not like things are going to exactly escalate to relationship status) recently told me that the litmus-test she had heard was where on the spectrum of whether you looked forward to your sessions or dreaded them. At this point, mine are a combination of a scheduling hassle and a cheerleading session for all the positive things I'm doing in setting, communicating, and enforcing boundaries. My low-stakes relationship with a poly-woman is a bit of a conflict between us. So I'm beginning to wonder exactly what it is I'm getting out of this anymore. Tempting to take a break, use more traditional support mechanisms, and perhaps restart if those start to fail me.
 

Jager

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That my friend is an excellent question. And more importantly, the right question. Impressive really.

That exact point is your personal make/break point. Because I was a third baseman I will use that.
A ground ball headed for the gap. I cut it off and pivot to throw to the second basemen who is almost to the bag for a double play.

How I pivot is everything!!! When I was new at it I had to drill it over and over. Low bounces and high bounces. Over and over until I was CERTAIN. Certainty is everything in life. Be certain and steadfast.

How you pivot on the go is important because it can work against your momentum or actually speed it up. Grace under fire. You have to make the pivot like you mean it.

You catch the suppression and recognize exactly what it is. A squelch of your life force and intent to subdue you. This is the feminine imperative at its core. The crush of a man’s spirit and soul. There is no reprieve. There is no mercy.

Pivot with momentum and don’t look back. If it seems impossible, it’s the perfect goal for you.
OP, I second that. It’s all or nothing. There’s a part of you that wants to conform, to be comfortable and fit in. With persistence and work this is overcome.

This journey is not a journey to win women (But it is a bonus. It’s happened to me before. They come to you, even irritated that you weren’t giving them the attention they wanted you to give them.)

This is a journey about yanking the lies taught to you as a child out of your mind, and those lies are going to go out kicking and screaming. The more false data you pull out and replace with truth, the more yourself you become. Everything comes naturally. Stick to your goals, and everything else will fall into place. You won’t even have to work for for the company of women, anymore, and game becomes useless information you never needed. The women, especially the fvckin hot ones ripe for a great fvckin time, come to you when you’re in this state.
 

Blacksheep

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That my friend is an excellent question. And more importantly, the right question. Impressive really.

That exact point is your personal make/break point. Because I was a third baseman I will use that.
A ground ball headed for the gap. I cut it off and pivot to throw to the second basemen who is almost to the bag for a double play.

How I pivot is everything!!! When I was new at it I had to drill it over and over. Low bounces and high bounces. Over and over until I was CERTAIN. Certainty is everything in life. Be certain and steadfast.

How you pivot on the go is important because it can work against your momentum or actually speed it up. Grace under fire. You have to make the pivot like you mean it.

You catch the suppression and recognize exactly what it is. A squelch of your life force and intent to subdue you. This is the feminine imperative at its core. The crush of a man’s spirit and soul. There is no reprieve. There is no mercy.

Pivot with momentum and don’t look back. If it seems impossible, it’s the perfect goal for you.
I think I got it.

Basically, I observed that I gave to much importance to what others wanted for me... Women, Family, etc...

And since I was raised in an environment where I was always guilty of the things I did, it kind of influenced all my relationships into adulthood.

And my fight has been just that ... letting go of this stupid guilt and starting to put me as a priority in my life.
 

Blacksheep

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This is a journey about yanking the lies taught to you as a child out of your mind, and those lies are going to go out kicking and screaming. The more false data you pull out and replace with truth, the more yourself you become. Everything comes naturally. Stick to your goals, and everything else will fall into place. You won’t even have to work for for the company of women, anymore, and game becomes useless information you never needed. The women, especially the fvckin hot ones ripe for a great fvckin time, come to you when you’re in this state.
I can literally feel those lies going out kicking and screaming when I detach from it. It's painfull but it worths.

There was a time in my life I didn't had to chase women, when I was confident, on a good shape and was not with those emotional issues. It was just like you said, there was no need for playing games or nothing... they came naturally. But since I got overweight it stopped haha

I have some goals right now on my life that is:

- Launch my app/games company, work hard on it to earn money and be able to leave my job and this town I live.
- Improve my game dev skills and finish my firs app project.
- Stop worrying to much about sex and this desire for it. I just think I need to find a way to calm down this desire.
- Lose the 30kg I've gained in the last 3 years. I was scared how much I got fat, and I know it was for those problems I'm going through.

It's a good challenge! :)
 

Alvafe

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meh here is the thing you are guilty of the things you do, they being good or bad you are guilty of it, what you need to do is take it as something you need to do, its your life its you who have to have a hold on it, not other people, be your own, if you work hard and make millions you are guilty of that too
 
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