"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Afraid of being alone

bud_2005

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2002
Messages
907
Reaction score
2
Yes I am only 22 years old but I have this fear of ending up alone. Sure taking girls home from the club and nailing them is nice to a point but I'm not very fond of these type of women except for the night. Are there any girls worth having a meaningful relationship with and where can you find them
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

The Bat

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 12, 2007
Messages
1,017
Reaction score
60
Kupid Diggs said:
Word of advice... You won't meet any quality women at the club...
Biggest bull$hit ever.

There is a difference between lonely and bachelor. Lonely guy NEEDS somebody there at the end of the night to go home to because he feels that it's him vs. the world and the only person who isn't out to get him is his significant other.

The bachelor WANTS somebody there at the end of the night who will come home with him because he feels that she should come into his world and enjoy the experience that will be being with him. It's not him vs. the rest of the world...it's mostly him AND the rest of the world vs. him since he is constantly on a path to self-improvement, a better person.

Now bud_2005, the question you need to ask yourself is, "Am I THAT insecure about myself that I absolutely NEED a girlfriend/wife in this lifetime?"

Make no mistake about it, walking the path of a real Man in this world is a lonely one but you always have allies at your disposal (i.e. the rest of the world).

The loneliest man in the world is the one who lays in bed next to a woman who he absolutely despises and she does him.

I believe you have been that person before. Do you really want to be that guy again?
 

DarkShade

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jun 8, 2008
Messages
252
Reaction score
12
Location
Atlanta
bud_2005 said:
Yes I am only 22 years old
You should be going out and having fun, enjoying the single life, in my opinion. When I was 22 I was strapped down to a girl I thought I loved but didn't, and guess what, I stuck it out till I was 26 (earlier this year) when it finally ended and I lost all of those years being tied to one person whom I didn't match up with at all.

What else are you doing with your time lamenting your loneliness? That's self destructive and self perpetuating. Do you think any girl is going to be attracted to a needy guy who is willing to do anything not to be alone? If a girl did that to me I'd run for the hills.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Kestrel

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 24, 2008
Messages
15
Reaction score
0
bud_2005 said:
Yes I am only 22 years old but I have this fear of ending up alone. Sure taking girls home from the club and nailing them is nice to a point but I'm not very fond of these type of women except for the night. Are there any girls worth having a meaningful relationship with and where can you find them
You are still quite young. You have plenty of time to find that special girl. It could happen soon or it could happen late in your life, but when it does, its worth the wait. As to where to find her, they are pretty much everywhere. She could be that girl who served you coffee. Or she could be that girl you pass by on the isle at the supermarket. She could be that girl pumping gas next to you. Or she could be that friend of a friend you haven't met yet. Most of my friends whom has gotten married found their wife through mutual friends.

First and formost, you should not harbor such fear. It will subconsciously make you more needy and hurt your relationships.
 
Top