Affairs - telling side girl about rlnship for secrecy purposes

[Ceiling Cat]

I am on a business trip away from my wife. I met a girl the other day and have a meet set up tomorrow with her.

However, there is the complicating factor that quite a few of my colleagues are shortly joining me, who have loose ties back to my wife. For various reasons which I won't go into in detail, it will be difficult to have the affair without telling the new girl that I am married and she needs to maintain secrecy.

We had a fairly long conversation the other day when we met in which I did not mention my marriage. The conversation was not overtly sexual and while there was a degree of kino there was nothing that couldn't be passed off as mere friendliness.

We are going to meet tomorrow at a bar followed by dinner and my plan is to tell her early on that I am married and I intentionally did not tell her when we first met because I was attracted to her, but it would still be good to hang out etc (this is somewhat plausable in the circumstances as she is new in the area and has said she wants to meet people etc). Then to attempt to progress things as normal, as there is clear attraction from her side. Can this work? It has the advantage of boldness, which could work in my favour.

I'm not sure I can take the risk of having the affair without telling her about my marriage.

 

[RangerMIke]

You shouldn't have 'side girls' you should just have women you are dating, one can not be better than the others, you have to treat them all the same. If you want more women in your life then great, you need to get divorced. This running around behind her back will screw you up emotionally. This is no way to live, it's not fair to you and it's not fair to her.

I'm not saying this because I'm a prude, if you are in an open marriage then hey... great. But if you are chasing after women other than your wife then you are not happy in your marriage staying in a marriage that is not doing it for you is not your path to happiness.

Ok having said that, honestly is the best policy. If you are going to have extra-marriage relations then you best be honest. I find it hard to believe that I have to keep saying this but it's the truth, WOMEN ALWAYS KNOW, you can not lie to women, they ALWAYS know when you are telling the truth. If you are cheating, your wife knows... if you are hitting up a woman, she knows you are married. When you lie, it makes you look weak.

 

[Tictac]

If you want to f*ck around, get a divorce.

Lying to everyone in your life for a piece of ass is ridiculous.

 

[dustmuffin]

If you want to f*ck around, get a divorce.

Lying to everyone in your life for a piece of ass is ridiculous.

Very good adive....divorce or fix what ya got. Cheating is very low IMO.

 

[Bible_Belt]

Getting caught cheating is wrong! (So don't get caught.)

And this:
quite a few of my colleagues are shortly joining me, who have loose ties back to my wife.
is exactly how you do get caught. Those colleagues are going to tell their wives and their other friends. To bring them along on your date with your mistress, is to, as the expression goes, "sh!t where you eat." Pick one or the other - don't mix them together.

 

[marmel75]

You shouldn't have 'side girls' you should just have women you are dating, one can not be better than the others, you have to treat them all the same. If you want more women in your life then great, you need to get divorced. This running around behind her back will screw you up emotionally. This is no way to live, it's not fair to you and it's not fair to her.

I'm not saying this because I'm a prude, if you are in an open marriage then hey... great. But if you are chasing after women other than your wife then you are not happy in your marriage staying in a marriage that is not doing it for you is not your path to happiness.

Ok having said that, honestly is the best policy. If you are going to have extra-marriage relations then you best be honest. I find it hard to believe that I have to keep saying this but it's the truth, WOMEN ALWAYS KNOW, you can not lie to women, they ALWAYS know when you are telling the truth. If you are cheating, your wife knows... if you are hitting up a woman, she knows you are married. When you lie, it makes you look weak.

Hmmm...well having had quite a few side pieces while being married, I'll tell you the way I did it.

Firstly if all you are looking for is some side action, the less they know about you the better. Fake name, fake job, etc. Make sure it's the same from date to date tho. That way much less of a chance of slipping up.

Secondly, I had a 10 bang rule. Meaning I would only bang them a maximum of 10 times. Whether that was over the course of 3 nights or 5 nights, once I hit that number I bounced. The reason why people get caught cheating is because they get too comfortable with the same person and start showing the same patterns for long periods of time. I might have hit a chick 4 times in a 3 week period but then went 2 months before getting a new one to hit. Therefore, there was no pattern to recognize. Also, it prevents either of you from becoming more attached than what you need to be to the other person. It's enough so you can have some fun with that person but not so much either of you get attached.

Thirdly, always keep your wallet locked in the car and your cell phone locked when banging a side chick. This way they have no way of finding out your info while you are in the shower, etc. Women are sneaky. It only takes one time to Fvck yourself for life. If you have social media, never have a pic of yourself on your profile. Lots of people will see it when you post in other people's threads. Eventually you will get caught from that alone.

Lastly, always bring your own shampoo to use when you take a shower at their house. Don't get busted from using a different soap or shampoo...that would be the worst way to go out...

Do what you do. Don't listen to these dudes talking this nonsense about how it will mess you up emotionally. It won't as long as you only allow it to be sex. Don't get sucked into a relationship. Get what you want and eject in a timely fashion. More guys need to realize that just because you like fvcking other women doesn't mean you don't love your wife. Sometimes you just get bored. It is what it is. I don't do it anymore but I don't regret what I did either. I have a weird ability that once something is in the past or someone isn't around anymore, it's almost like I completely block them out of my memory, so that in my mind it's almost like it never happened.

Use common sense bro. Why would some random side chick care enough about keeping your secret about being married? She wouldn't, unless you are trying to make her your mistress and pumping her full of the whole "I'm gonna leave her for you" sh!t which is dangerous because that only plays for so long before you are forced to make a decision. Eventually she/they will Fvck you over even if it's without meaning by letting the cat out of the bag to the wrong person who tells another who tells another, etc...