been a while since I updated but with halloween and everything its been crazy.
to be honest Ive about given up hope...
i dont ask girls out I dont really talk to anyone or initiate convo's ever... its not cause I'm afraid... its cause I'm sick of how stupid ppl are.
Ok... example ... I'm sitting at a friends house...
for about an hour or so I listen to them banter about who is correct on how mutch a value meal in canada is....
now seems how none of us has been to canada and ... most likely none of us will ever go to canada... to me... I just say nothing and think... why do these ppl get up in the morning?
Or say my job...
I go to work... and it has to be the most dramatic place ever... High school has nothing on this crap... so no motivatoin to talk in that place if I tell ppl about my nights or parties it instantly becomes gossip ... so i just shut my face.
Lets see I havnt been laid in like.. 3 years
I'm not the hottest guy on earth but when I clean myself up and dress in silk .... I get alot of looks.
In fact I think I'm the problem.
it isnt really even a problem.
2 nights ago a redhead asked me to come over to her house and ****...
I said no.
I shouldnt turn down good things but I dont want to be stalked again eather.
stuff like this happens alot... I get lots of offers *when* I go out but I dont go out... because why ... everyone is eather retarded beyond belief or so slutty I just cant do it.
I have standards and no girls I meet have the qualities I'm looking for...
I mean look you wana ****... you dont have to say.. wana ****?
there are mutch smoother ways to go plus when I'm not turned on and somone shoots something like that it makes my skin crawl... because I know its not just me its lots of guys..
thats what disgusts me what happend to self respect dont ppl realize what that does to them?
Well, I duno what to do with myself I'm going down to the school in a couple minutes to register for classes next spring...
I'm really feeling down
