"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Advice from anyone please (phone / IM)

Telos

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So... I've been seeing this girl for about a month now. I'm 22 and she's 18. She runs about 8 miles a day and has the most insane body that I've ever seen. Her face is legendary and she gets quite a few guys hitting on her all the time. We've gone out for awhile now and almost every single time we hung out it ended up with sex. Problem is she calls me constantly to try and "chat" now. She is convinced that I am her long lost soul-mate and whenever she can she makes up an excuse to see me. Obviously her IL is still strong despite our constant contact but I think I can start to feel things going downhill. She's not as interested as she was when we first met. She hits me up on AIM and constantly wants to talk about her life. Usually I will talk to her for about 30 minutes or so, but if it goes beyond that I cut things short. Am I going to reduce her IL by indulging her like this?

I'm pretty sure I am... so here's my next question... what's my excuse going to be when she calls? She's already told me she loves me and she expects me to return her calls, IM's, and texts. Should I just say, "I'm busy, sorry"? She is the type that has low self esteem and she is afraid she's going to be alone all her life. The DJ inside me wants to keep a distance but the more sensitive side inside me wants to be there. I'm afraid I'm starting to really care about her.

Any advice?
 
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"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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KontrollerX

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Your gut instinct is telling you that despite her professions of undying love her interest level is going down.

Your gut instinct is right.

She is telling you the love garbage she is telling you so that you will continue to be there for her and listen to her problems until she can secure a new and perceived better branch of male interest and thus cut your interest off.

As far as I know the only way you can win this battle with her is to play the distant card and make her work for your time.

Scarcity creates value.

Whenever you decide to give in and give her some time using this distancy tactic always make sure you get something of value out of it be it sex, her paying for dinner somewhere or whatever.

The higher her IL grows in you again if it does the more safe you can feel returning back to normal relations with her like it was in the past.

Your gut instinct again tells you that her interest is dying you simply repeat the distancing tactics.

Lather, rinse, repeat basically.

As for an excuse on the phone all you have to do is tell her you're really busy now and have to go, you were supposed to meet a friend and go somewhere, or you have relatives coming to visit.

Its not rocket science.
 
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Pay no mind to her "Love" game - you have known her for a few weeks and boinked her a few times and now she wants to be your wife? Please!!!! You are just the next pimp in line!! Only talk to her in person - otherwise don't answer the phone - problem solved!!
 

Telos

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Thanks for the response Kontroller. I understand your point about scarcity.
I've always known that and utilized it to my advantage. When a girl like this comes around I find that I usually play the game to a T in the beginning, but then my game starts to soften once I get closer.

Don't get me wrong--I don't turn into a f*cking p*ssy. I just tend to stick around a little longer, show her that I care a little more, and I get a little more accessible then I probably should.

I think you are 100% right though.
 
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She already took her clothes off after the first few hours of knowing you and you hit it - it's too late for the "scarcity" game - you reached the maximum intimacy level already!! Just don't become her g/f by talking to her on the phone/online as a friend - you are beyond that point based on her sexual actions!

Be scarce, for what? The pursuit is over - yiou had her!!!!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Telos

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I don't know man. That's a good point. I'm not sure that sex was in itself an end for me. I enjoyed it; we both did... very very much. In fact, she told me that I gave her the longest orgasm of her life. I think I gave her a total of seven orgasms the other night, each averaging about 20 seconds. She was absolutely drunk on pleasure and couldn't even speak straight after. I wish I had a camera.

I find myself wanting more though. I keep drifting back to her pictures and I just can't help but get overtaken by her intoxicating vibe. She's so young, adventurous, eager, and ready for anything at any time. She told me that she would never care if I hooked up with another girl so long as I was honest with her. She gives road head on command. She's also bi and actually helped me hit on this waitress at a local pizza joint.

So I guess the reason why I want to maintain her IL might be rooted in selfishness. I honestly don't want her going out and hooking up with a bunch of other guys. Yes, there is a tinge of jealousy. I would rather she comes to me for her satisfaction. She's careless, extremely horny, and extremely flirtatious. I have this fetishized goal of doing the impossible and trying to keep her dependent on me. I want to see how far I can take it.

Bad? Yes. I'm very bad.
 

penkitten

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the oneitis is taking over already......
(cue the evil music )
dum dum dum...
 

KontrollerX

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"So I guess the reason why I want to maintain her IL might be rooted in selfishness. I honestly don't want her going out and hooking up with a bunch of other guys. Yes, there is a tinge of jealousy. I would rather she comes to me for her satisfaction. She's careless, extremely horny, and extremely flirtatious. I have this fetishized goal of doing the impossible and trying to keep her dependent on me. I want to see how far I can take it.

Bad? Yes. I'm very bad."


There is a great phrase I heard once that goes...

"Those who love too much lose everything but those who love with irony last."

Not saying you love HER but you certainly love the benefits she brings into your life.

Anyway I believe what the quote I just posted means is that to hold onto someone you want more and more of you must do the opposite of what feels should logically get you results.

In other words fight the AFC mind within that wants to be overly caring and sharing and embrace the DJ mindset which is all about maximizing your happiness not someone else's.

You know this already and are slowly winning the fight against that inner AFC we all have that creeps back up at certain times.

In anycase your idea of keeping her dependant on you is outstanding as it is one of the 48 Laws of Power.

To make use of this law you have to find something that she can get from you she cannot get anywhere else or talk to her and find some emotional void of hers to fill that attaches her to you strongly.

Basically a great weakness you can exploit and then you will have her for as long as you want her.
 
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She's "Bi" ???? A pervert!! Sex is the only thing she is good for!!!! What do you want from this??
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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