"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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ADHD

Murk

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I've been diagnosed with ADHD. I always knew I had it, but I just thought the symptoms were mild and I could persevere. It's taken my lack of concentration with my business to finally seek help and I've been prescribed medication. I've extremely against medication (hence me putting this off for so long) but I have no choice.

My question is does anyone have any experience with this? Personally, friends/family? Any homeopathic routes I could take that work? I literally have every single symptom in the book and surprised I've made it this far without any intervention.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Lynx nkaf

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I've been diagnosed with ADHD. I always knew I had it, but I just thought the symptoms were mild and I could persevere. It's taken my lack of concentration with my business to finally seek help and I've been prescribed medication. I've extremely against medication (hence me putting this off for so long) but I have no choice.

My question is does anyone have any experience with this? Personally, friends/family? Any homeopathic routes I could take that work? I literally have every single symptom in the book and surprised I've made it this far without any intervention.
I remember reading one must never have white sugar again after a diagnosis.

Any books on food allergies/intolerances for kids would be good to get.

I know you're not a kid, just seems they put more workable solutions in the books geared to taking care of kids.
 

metalwater

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Coffee in some cases helps. Search it up on the internet. I saw it first hand helping someone.
 

Atom Smasher

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Buy yourself a digital timer. NOT a phone app. You want a physical timer with buttons on it. At night, write down a few tasks that would make you feel you had a successful day tomorrow.

In the morning, look at your first task, set your timer for a short amount of time (maybe 15 or 20 minutes to start), and work on your task until the beeper goes off. Set the timer again and do your usual distracted stuff... check your email, check the news, check here to see what amazing knowledge yours truly has dispensed for the day :cool:, then reset the timer again and go for the next task. Repeat throughout the day.

What we ADHD people lack is a sense of STRUCTURE. Usually when we have structure, we do fine. But especially when running a business, the lack of structure becomes crippling. By using the timer, you are creating a structure. Beginning and end points for your tasks. You can even visualize those time blocks as compartments. This has helped me enormously in my life and it always gets me on track on those days where my lack of structure catches up with me.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Spaz

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Buy yourself a digital timer. NOT a phone app. You want a physical timer with buttons on it. At night, write down a few tasks that would make you feel you had a successful day tomorrow.

In the morning, look at your first task, set your timer for a short amount of time (maybe 15 or 20 minutes to start), and work on your task until the beeper goes off. Set the timer again and do your usual distracted stuff... check your email, check the news, check here to see what amazing knowledge yours truly has dispensed for the day :cool:, then reset the timer again and go for the next task. Repeat throughout the day.

What we ADHD people lack is a sense of STRUCTURE. Usually when we have structure, we do fine. But especially when running a business, the lack of structure becomes crippling. By using the timer, you are creating a structure. Beginning and end points for your tasks. You can even visualize those time blocks as compartments. This has helped me enormously in my life and it always gets me on track on those days where my lack of structure catches up with me.
You got ADHD...

That's what confused me for the longest time, in that, I can't place you in a single profile, one moment u r there and the next you display another which by right is impossible for a normal male.

So you forced learned an inherent trait.
 

17 shots

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Atom's advice is spot on. You're just gonna have to schedule things so that you stick to them
 

17 shots

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Also try CBD. It helps regulate dopamine levels, which can be an issue for people with ADHD
 

Lynx nkaf

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I concur with the this diet fundamental. I’ve seen it twice where the parents took their son off of cereal and had almost immediate improvement. Two eggs or a shaker of protein instead of cheap sugars and grains in the morning did amazing wonders.
Thinking of this thread yesterday, 2 coworkers said I seem MORE hyper, the LESS coffee I drink(having less milk because of this too)

I feel MORE energetic, that's all it is.

I hope that's all it is.

Btw, good points in your other recently posted thread this morning TheFinalLine, I agree. Months ago when asking for advice on developing more femininity here, I was encouraged to be more 'agressive in bed'

Wait, what?

Good to see you know the right direction of flow on that subject.
 

Murk

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I remember reading one must never have white sugar again after a diagnosis.

Any books on food allergies/intolerances for kids would be good to get.

I know you're not a kid, just seems they put more workable solutions in the books geared to taking care of kids.
So true, it's all geared towards kids and school work - which looking back I really needed - the result is I massively underachieved from my top 5% predictions.

I am already cutting sugar out as part of my new fitness regime - I'll just be more strict with sugar.

Remove distractions. Facebook. Cell phone. Etc while your working. Put them out of eyesight.
I have, everything has been deleted, my problem is I will find a distraction by any means possible, I can't even sit through a 10 minute video on VAT returns (a UK tax thing). I need the meds man.

Buy yourself a digital timer. NOT a phone app. You want a physical timer with buttons on it. At night, write down a few tasks that would make you feel you had a successful day tomorrow.

In the morning, look at your first task, set your timer for a short amount of time (maybe 15 or 20 minutes to start), and work on your task until the beeper goes off. Set the timer again and do your usual distracted stuff... check your email, check the news, check here to see what amazing knowledge yours truly has dispensed for the day :cool:, then reset the timer again and go for the next task. Repeat throughout the day.

What we ADHD people lack is a sense of STRUCTURE. Usually when we have structure, we do fine. But especially when running a business, the lack of structure becomes crippling. By using the timer, you are creating a structure. Beginning and end points for your tasks. You can even visualize those time blocks as compartments. This has helped me enormously in my life and it always gets me on track on those days where my lack of structure catches up with me.
I've always been a list writer, and the structure work gave me helped me excel and be literally at the top of my field. This success led my to open my own business - and now I'm crumbling with this newfound freedom and lack of structure. I'm drowning.

Where can I buy a timer like this? I really appreciate your response and I feel like you "get it".


I concur with the this diet fundamental. I’ve seen it twice where the parents took their son off of cereal and had almost immediate improvement. Two eggs or a shaker of protein instead of cheap sugars and grains in the morning did amazing wonders.
I don't eat breakfast but I did eat lots of junk. I now have 2 protein shakes a day and the rest is healthy fats, protein from chicken, beans, beef, eggs and carbs (brown rice/veg).

The result is I got things in order and finally sought help for my ADHD which up until this point was manageable.

Appreciate all responses I'll try to locate an electronic timer. I live and die by tasks/tick boxes.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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mrgoodstuff

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So true, it's all geared towards kids and school work - which looking back I really needed - the result is I massively underachieved from my top 5% predictions.

I am already cutting sugar out as part of my new fitness regime - I'll just be more strict with sugar.


I have, everything has been deleted, my problem is I will find a distraction by any means possible, I can't even sit through a 10 minute video on VAT returns (a UK tax thing). I need the meds man.
Put a website blocker on your laptop to keep you off of time wasting websites. When you feel yourself distracted to something non important, find something on your priority list to do.

Don't keep procrastinating the hardest thing, do it first. Everything else will be easy after that. Always be growing your case and making it a better place.

Be aware of all energy and attention drains and leeches.

I've always been a list writer, and the structure work gave me helped me excel and be literally at the top of my field. This success led my to open my own business - and now I'm crumbling with this newfound freedom and lack of structure. I'm drowning.

Where can I buy a timer like this? I really appreciate your response and I feel like you "get it".



I don't eat breakfast but I did eat lots of junk. I now have 2 protein shakes a day and the rest is healthy fats, protein from chicken, beans, beef, eggs and carbs (brown rice/veg).

The result is I got things in order and finally sought help for my ADHD which up until this point was manageable.

Appreciate all responses I'll try to locate an electronic timer. I live and die by tasks/tick boxes.
 

Lynx nkaf

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So true, it's all geared towards kids and school work - which looking back I really needed - the result is I massively underachieved from my top 5% predictions.

I am already cutting sugar out as part of my new fitness regime - I'll just be more strict with sugar.


I have, everything has been deleted, my problem is I will find a distraction by any means possible, I can't even sit through a 10 minute video on VAT returns (a UK tax thing). I need the meds man.



I've always been a list writer, and the structure work gave me helped me excel and be literally at the top of my field. This success led my to open my own business - and now I'm crumbling with this newfound freedom and lack of structure. I'm drowning.

Where can I buy a timer like this? I really appreciate your response and I feel like you "get it".



I don't eat breakfast but I did eat lots of junk. I now have 2 protein shakes a day and the rest is healthy fats, protein from chicken, beans, beef, eggs and carbs (brown rice/veg).

The result is I got things in order and finally sought help for my ADHD which up until this point was manageable.

Appreciate all responses I'll try to locate an electronic timer. I live and die by tasks/tick boxes.
Good job Murk, you're on the right path. Good action you're taking, thinking of you and hope this works out.
 

Murk

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I know it.
My dear brother, I'm actually a sister in the brotherhood who has been helped during this pandemic time by sosuave like you wouldn't believe.

But call me bro, it's more important what we all learn here.
Do you have a nice ass?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Trez

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Enjoy your legal meth. Remember Adderall is virtually the same as meth.
 

Murk

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Enjoy your legal meth. Remember Adderall is virtually the same as meth.
Sign me up.

It's also actually speed, which I also love.
 

Trez

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Sign me up.

It's also actually speed, which I also love.
Meth is ok but it's just a steady zing in the background and the come down is so long, can't sleep, don't want to eat. I prefer crack by far over meth. It's just so much more intense. Plus I can eat and go to sleep later.

I mean it's your life but in the long run amphetamines are going to damage your receptors. It'll probably get you ahead in some ways but you'll pay a price. If you ever run out or decide to quit its going to take a while to get back to normal.
 

Murk

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Meth is ok but it's just a steady zing in the background and the come down is so long, can't sleep, don't want to eat. I prefer crack by far over meth. It's just so much more intense. Plus I can eat and go to sleep later.

I mean it's your life but in the long run amphetamines are going to damage your receptors. It'll probably get you ahead in some ways but you'll pay a price. If you ever run out or decide to quit its going to take a while to get back to normal.
Bro we've been through this, no drugs, ever. Stop doing drugs bro they are going to kill you.

I dabble, I did .5g of coke yesterday and gave most of it away. My relationship with drugs is very healthy and controlled. I can afford them, I don't abuse them.
 

Trez

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Bro we've been through this, no drugs, ever. Stop doing drugs bro they are going to kill you.

I dabble, I did .5g of coke yesterday and gave most of it away. My relationship with drugs is very healthy and controlled. I can afford them, I don't abuse them.
Hey taking Adderall isn't much different than doing meth. I've done both. I don't use any amphetamines and won't because I just kind of don't like them. I won't touch opioites. I can pass a drug test right now.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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