Yeah...but WHAT? lolOriginally posted by Take No Dirt:
Hey Wyldfire! You're something![]()
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Yeah...but WHAT? lolOriginally posted by Take No Dirt:
Hey Wyldfire! You're something![]()
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
There is something very strange to me about the mindset of being willing to MARRY a woman only because she is the one who has shown the "most interest" in you. Not that a woman being interested in you is a bad thing, it just doesn't seem like it should be the chief criteria and certainly not the ONLY creteria.Originally posted by Anti-Dump
I have a house that keeps me busy also. The woman that shows the MOST INTEREST gets to live there after marriage.
I am not opposed to looking for a girl who likes you a lot. Who would want to be with someone who WASN'T into them? All I was saying is that it is indicative of some profound emotional security issues for one to hold the highest POSSIBLE "interest level" as the chief if not the ONLY creterion for the woman one intends to marry.Originally posted by Oxide
PDX, looking for a girl who is loyal (likes you a lot) is normal, i dont see anything wrong with it.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
I'm in agreement with Now What. AD's program is a great set of training wheels.Originally posted by Now What
I don't think I'd call AD an AFC, though his strategies are clearly fundamental/ beginner. This is great for beginners. It is important to know the fundamentals.
However, for those who have the basics down, this article by Allen Thompson on Confident Persistence describes (essentially) AD's tactics and their weaknesses, and then goes on to describe more advanced tactics: http://www.sosuave.com/articles/persistence.htm
?FACT that a woman of extraordinary attractiveness requires a MUCH different approach than a girl who ain't all that hot.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I wasn't recommending that you put up with BS just because she is hot. I think you misunderstood me. All I said was that it requires a different approach to be successful with a more attractive girl than with a less attractive girl. If you want me to elaborate further I will, but I think you will understand now.Originally posted by Oxide
Yes, hot girls know they are hot. They usually have more guys wanting them. Why the hell should i care? I want her, and ill be damned if i am going to put up with BS just becuase she is hot!
Maybe I shouldn't have said that. But I don't know what else to call a guy who has such a deadly fear of losing a woman that he implements a system designed to weed out all women besides the "most interested woman" in the hopes of finding a woman SO interested that there is, in his mind, ZERO possibility of ever losing her. He is so insecure that he cannot even stand to entertain it as a possibility that he may loose a woman. Even the NAME Anti-Dump reflects this neurotic phobia of his! Come on! And what else would cause him to be so neurotically afraid of losing a woman besides an underlying lack of condfidence in his ability to be interesting or attractive to them? And finally...what type of guy would have such negative deeply held beliefs about his desirability to women as those here aforementioned? ANSWER: An AFC.Originally posted by Mr. Mystery
That being said, I'm not sure I would go so far as to call him an AFC or anything negative.
What do I think? I think it was absolutely unnecessary and inappropriate for you to post DeepBlue's article (which by the way is a masterpiece) in your own thread when it would have been so much easer to provide a link to it. Which would have credited him more strongly for his own material rather than causing you to be praised as some sort of proxy for DeepBlue.Originally posted by Oxide
I see you mentioned DeepBlue. He was a great guy.
Read this post, i'm curious what you think:
(link snipped)
I agree, although I think the guy just didn't know any better.I think it was absolutely unnecessary and inappropriate for you to post DeepBlue's article
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.