"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Accurate reading on this Girl???

ARguy

New Member
Joined
Dec 30, 2011
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
Ok so there is this girl, we are both in college and I cannot get an accurate reading on whether she likes me as a friend or something more.

These last few weeks I have been going to her dorm late at night. Mostly because I text her and set it up myself. When together we hang out and are very affectionate, as in snuggle up to each other and watch a movie or basically just talk through the night, etc. Point is we get pretty close.


Now for the issue, It is one thing when we are in private, but in public it is not anything like that. When we see each other we will hug if that and hardly talk UNLESS I approach her first. Also in regards to texting... She hardly ever texts first. We hardly hang out aside from those few late nights.

Because of this I feel that she wants me when it is late and she is bored at night with nothing to do.

In the end, I find myself putting in more effort and I just get mixed signals.

As a bit more I always feel she tests me when we are together as in always asking me what would I do if I was married and etc. etc. Or would you be mad at a girlfriend if this.....

Thoughts??? Is it just not worth the time?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,110
Reaction score
136
Age
45
Location
Manhattan, NY
If you're over her place late at night, and you're cuddling with her, then it's up to YOU to go for the kiss.

Maybe she's wasting your time. Maybe not. Honestly, you haven't made any bold moves, so how could I know?

Seems like you think that just showing up is enough. Like, "I'm here. Where's the p*ssy?" Get a couple drinks in, do your cuddling thing, but next time, go for the kiss. You're the man. You make the moves. Stop expecting the girls to do it for you.
 

sighsigh

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2011
Messages
189
Reaction score
7
Location
Toronto, Canada
You like this girl, and the two of you have been spending time together and cuddling for weeks, but you haven't actually kissed, had sex, or arranged a date? It sounds like you are deep in AFC land.
 

bigneil

Banned
Joined
Oct 20, 2006
Messages
8,265
Reaction score
2,644
Location
Texas
Goddamn it throw her down and tear her clothes off and find out, don't write to us about it.
 

ARguy

New Member
Joined
Dec 30, 2011
Messages
9
Reaction score
0
Haha, ok I understand. I guess I already knew I should do this but I just got out of a relationship a few months ago and to be quite honest this is intimidating me more than it usually would. Better to do this sooner than later I suppose/
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

floydb25

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 26, 2011
Messages
1,762
Reaction score
108
Location
NC
Do NOT let fear guide you. There's nothing to be intimidated or scared of. If you want to not make anything come of this - follow your fears. They will lead you right to where you don't want to be.

In other words, just go for it. You have nothing to lose, but possibly something to gain. If you get rejected / pushed away - you know where you stand, and don't have to invest anymore. Don't analyze or ask - figure it out for yourself - by going for it. Facts are always better than assumptions. Just gotta try, and see what happens.
 

window

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2007
Messages
472
Reaction score
7
this girl really likes you, you need to go for the kiss...
 
Top