"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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About to try a new game plan...

Pair A Dice

Don Juan
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Well, there is this girl at my apartment complex that I've only seen once walking around, but I know what car she drives. I am considering on putting a Post-It Note on her windshield with something quick and to the point of seeing if she's single and going from there, possibly give her my number or e-mail on it to get in touch with me.

Any ideas on what to write on the note or is this a stupid idea? I hardly see her, so if I happened to see her before this, I'd go for that in person, but otherwise, this will have to do.

Edit: Let me also state that when I saw her earlier, we struck up a short, pleasant conversation on our respective walks to our apartments. It last one minute tops, just about regular stuff.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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grayclif

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Creepy brah! She's gonna think you're a stalker. Just spin plates. When she sees girls entering or leaving your apt. she'll find a way to meet you if she is single.
 

Die Hard

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Could it be possible that you're looking for an easy way out here? I mean, is it really that difficult to get to talk to her in person?

She lives in the same apartment complex, it would be weird if you don't run into her again in the near future... Perhaps you don't have the patience to wait for this because your desire is too strong? Keep it in check, then... Be in control of yourself!

My advice is to forget about her. It's bullsh!t thinking you won't run into her again, that's just your desire pushing you to do stupid things... So forget about her! Then when you least expect it, all of a sudden, you will run into her. It always goes like that :)

If you really can't wait for that chance, then at least just find out at which appartment she lives and have the balls to go there and confront her. That kind of boldness always reaps more success than insecure actions like putting a note on her windscreen...

But like I said, I would just be patient and keep your eagerness to meet her in check, you'll run into her again eventually.
 

Boilermaker

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post it note on her windshield ??

hahahahhahaha
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Double dices,
Great idea,but silly to ask her if she has other relationships....soo needy...Naah....See when she seems to have some time,then pen a note,"I am Harry from No nine,generally go to (say) Alberts for a coffee on Saturday morning,you seem an interesting person,maybe join me?I'll knock on your door about elevenish Harry (Phone No)"....when you go round you will certainly get a reaction,if she has a fellah in tow,she will text a refusal,no refusal you are in like Flynn.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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bilboteabaggins

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do it, I know a girl that told this story about a unknown guy putting a note under her dorm door and it got her all tore up and she went out with the guy for a long time eventually, after he played with her for weeks with notes....its called mystery and girls eat it up, the note needs to be real good though

take a chance if you wanna do it that way, a man doesn't care what others think, he goes with what he wants to do
 

scrouds

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It doesn't count creepy, it is creepy.

You had a nice pleasant conversation with her. Keep that up and you'll have made a nice friend. If you win her trust, she may even start confiding in you and telling you about the men in her life that use her like a fuktoy and throw her out.

Finally, what does it matter if she's single. Why should you care?
 

Pair A Dice

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scrouds said:
It doesn't count creepy, it is creepy.

You had a nice pleasant conversation with her. Keep that up and you'll have made a nice friend. If you win her trust, she may even start confiding in you and telling you about the men in her life that use her like a fuktoy and throw her out.

Finally, what does it matter if she's single. Why should you care?
I see what you're getting at. I definitely don't want a friend out of her, from what I've seen. She's too cute not to ravish.

What does it matter if she's single? I'm not a guy to go after women who are in relationships. I hold myself to a higher moral fiber.
 

Lexington

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Like said above, the posit-it note approach is going to come off as really creepy. Your best bet is to talk to her face to face. You will run into her again at some point (if not by chance, you can find a way to make it happen). Have a pleasant chat with her and at the end just whip out your phone and say that she seems pretty cool and that you'd like to hang out some time. Hand her the phone and tell her to enter the number. Then call her to make sure she has your number.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Pair A Dice

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I hear you guys. Also, I am still meeting other women and not putting all of my eggs into this basket. It's something that popped into my head once (post-it note) and wanted to gauge what you all felt about it.
 

scrouds

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Pair A Dice said:
I see what you're getting at. I definitely don't want a friend out of her, from what I've seen. She's too cute not to ravish.

What does it matter if she's single? I'm not a guy to go after women who are in relationships. I hold myself to a higher moral fiber.
Your "moral fiber" is concocted by society to keep you down. The key I feel is a long term realignment of your moral compass to more closely align with real world risk and reward, instead of what was drilled in to you by god and society.
 
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