A word of warning about hero worship in the community

[Nutz]

After many years in the community I've seen a lot of guys fall victim to hero worship of their favorite PUA gurus. And yes I was guilty of this myself once upon a time. One of the things I had to disabuse myself of was the notion that these guys are better than anyone else in the community. What I've realized through personal experience and by virtue of enduring in the community as long as I have is that a lot of them are just really good at self-promoting.

My advice for those seeking mentors and for someone to look up to is to look at the women the "gurus" are having relationships with. If they're so damn good at what they do then they should be having the pick of the litter in terms of looks and personality. Some of the "gurus" many would regard at being the best in the business aren't actually so when you look at the women they involve themselves with. I won't name names, but off the top of my head I can think of 3 top-level well known guys in the community that have average or butterface significant others that completely betrays their supposed level of mastery of getting the women of their dreams. That, or their idea of what's good looking is wildly different from what most would consider attractive.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

After many years in the community I've seen a lot of guys fall victim to hero worship of their favorite PUA gurus. And yes I was guilty of this myself once upon a time. One of the things I had to disabuse myself of was the notion that these guys are better than anyone else in the community. What I've realized through personal experience and by virtue of enduring in the community as long as I have is that a lot of them are just really good at self-promoting.

My advice for those seeking mentors and for someone to look up to is to look at the women the "gurus" are having relationships with. If they're so damn good at what they do then they should be having the pick of the litter in terms of looks and personality. Some of the "gurus" many would regard at being the best in the business aren't actually so when you look at the women they involve themselves with. I won't name names, but off the top of my head I can think of 3 top-level well known guys in the community that have average or butterface significant others that completely betrays their supposed level of mastery of getting the women of their dreams. That, or their idea of what's good looking is wildly different from what most would consider attractive.

Uhm...I'm guessing one of them has the initials "PS"?

 

[VladPatton]

Phuck those motherphuckers. All for money, and all they do is make you believe everything is 100% your fault to get you to buy their 'product' and make you part ways with your dollar.

In fact, I found sosuave after doing a Google search for "are Pua's frauds?"

Interesting.

I think they guys' opinions here are worth more than any programs these douchers sell.

 

[Scars]

Never payed for a single book, bootcamp, or subscription and I like to think I've learned a lot of have been successful. Most PUA's are in it to make money yes, there's a lot of heavy marketing towards pick-up. It's easy to fall victim to it all.

Best read I ever got was the DJ bible (which is free.) Everything else I learned through trial and error. That's why I express experience so much on here. You won't learn a thing until you put it into practice. Not everything works for everyone. I've found what works for me and discarded the rest. Keep doing this practice and eventually you will develop a style that works for YOU.

-Scars

 

[zekko]

I agree that you shouldn't get into hero worship. But when it comes to goals, there's a big difference between picking up club girls for sex and having a relationship.

Obviously a girl has to appeal to you physically, but beyond that I'm not sure you can really choose who you form connections with. A good relationship is a lot like picking out a best friend, there's something about them what you click with them on a deeper level. It's more about personality than looks.

Like I said, the girl has to get past your physical attractiveness standards first. But beyond that, it's unlikely that the most @ss licking hot girl in the club will be the one that pushes all your buttons. If a guy thinks that a girl is attractive in his own eyes, that's all that matters. I doubt that his goal is to impress you.

Besides, the hottest/most attractive girls I've dated were constantly being hit on, and I found that rather annoying. I'm sure most PUA gurus have been with enough hot women that they are not all that phased by looks.

 

[JohnnyStorm]

I know there is a lot of hate on "The Game", but I thought it was a fascinating read.
Mystery, for example, for all his PUA skillz came across as such a flawed and needy individual. To me, most PUA's don't represent what I feel DJ'ing is all about. I want to develop myself to the best of my ability, as a goal for me. Having women pursue me will be an added bonus.

If you're putting anyone but yourself on the pedestal, then you've got it wrong imo.

 

[d!ckmojo]

I disagree, man. I think its important to have good role models and mentors, at any stage in your life you should be looking up to people who have gone before you and illuminated the way. Its arrogance to think that everyone else are douche bags and you're the only boss abouts.

 

[Uberguy]

I disagree, man. I think its important to have good role models and mentors, at any stage in your life you should be looking up to people who have gone before you and illuminated the way. Its arrogance to think that everyone else are douche bags and you're the only boss abouts.

Emulate a positive role model if you must, but not to the degree where you neglect your own potential for greatness. Be your own hero.

 

[TonyBaloney]

I would disagree with this.

During the height of my womansing, I always held dear the life and times of the greatest womaniser of them all - Mick Jagger.

As a boy, I used to read this and that about him, and then lots more as time went on through his fathering a lovechild in his late 50's- even though hes 70 nearly, I can tell you that he will be exposed again at some point for feeling a waitress up or something Hes been a player FOR LIFE

 

[Mike32ct]

I think it's more of an issue on pickup sites than SS. Guys on pickup sites worship their gurus. We have a little of that here, but not nearly as much.