Victory Unlimited
Master Don Juan
Great post, LOVELYLADY!
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
jonwon said:An email i got from a girl i am in contact with:
*start
"This is me being very honest and what I look for in a man:-
1. I need the initial attraction (shallow I know but hey it’s my list)
2. Taller than me and not too skinny
3. I like a good conversation and someone that doesn’t talk to my chest is a bonus
4. Sex appeal is very important.. I want to look at him and want him in bed just by looking at him
5. I want him to make me feel like I’m the most important person in the world when with him
6. Someone that cares how I feel and is respectful.. I always think of the person I’m with and I expect the same
7. A man that knows what he wants and has his own life/friends.. Its important to have this I think as I have a full life
8. Great in bed and a real man (This had to feature in my list) lol
*end
You asked her about to articulate, openly " what she looks for in a man".
Do we take it to mean that she is looking for a FB or a man with whom she can have a relationship ?
Let us assume a FB is what she wants. Then #s 2,3,3 6 and 7 are mostly irrelevant.
Alternatively,she may be looking for an LTR with a guy,so where are her requirements for that ? What about 'honesty, involvement, loyalty and good decision making ?
On the surface she appears to be 'clear' about that she wants. However ,we all know two things about women. What they SAY is not usually what they really mean,therefor how much value do we place on her words in that list.
SEcondly, even their most forthright statements still require translation - code breaking...!!!
Look at #6. " Someone who cares about how I feel ......"
Who really knows what women means when they go on about respect ..They place no emotional value on respect as we know it .MOstly they mean that we men should tolerate (without protest) their emotional swirling and swaying and their irrationality and their whining and complaining.... " he should care about how I FEEL ..."
Who knows -who really knows ??
Is this a sexual innuendo?penkitten said:what penkitten wants in her husband:
1. give me the fluffy pillow at night.
the end
Last Man Standing said:Is this a sexual innuendo?![]()
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
cpddavis said:Regarding #2 - All women want a man taller than themselves, but they are committed to the height thing to varying degrees. That said, in a bar pick-up scene, a tall ugly guy with limited game will usually do better than a shorter attractive guy with social skills. It's weird - in the long term that guy doesn't do as well but in a short term situation he's hooking up. Height is a bigger deal to women than looks initially.
I'm a shorter guy (5'8) and this is something I've observed, I don't mope about it and still do fine, but there is definately a significant portion of women who are really adamant about it and not just taller girls - there are girls that are 5'3 that will only date 6' and over. Not the biggest deal in the world but it's a noticable factor. Seriously, how many ass ugly tall dudes have you seen with trim that should be out of their league. If you have game it evens out a bit after a while (assuming you're good looking) but it can be a big hurdle, especially in a competitive environment.
Ahrrr ! a minimalist - how unusual in a femme. MY kind of dame.penkitten said:what penkitten wants in her husband:
1. give me the fluffy pillow at night.
the end
no, it is just the best pillow in the house....Last Man Standing said:Is this a sexual innuendo?![]()
um, never heard that one before.ThunderMaverick said:Well it's THE new and best sexual act these days, haven't you heard?
I talked to a girl the other day about doing the "fluffy pillow" to her and she had to leave immediately to change her shoes and socks.
Seconded.Honestly, I think this list is the most genuine I've ever seen.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.