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A millions questions about BPDs

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Are BPDs the same as female socipoaths? Or is there a difference? And what is the difference between HPD and BPD? Are some BPDs just naturally born with the disorder or is it always developed? Do all BPDs have issues with other women, dislike their dads, have a lot of crazy baggage, etc? Or are there any who just have it even though they have a somewhat decent relationship with their dad, no rape or abuse stories, have lots of female friends, etc? And are there women who have all the bad signs of a BPD but don't actually have it? A lot of the times you guys describe women who gave you a hard time as BPD so I'm wondering the legitimacy of it. Anyway, please answer the questions.
 

Infern0

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They aren't the same as female sociopaths, although there is a lot of differences. Sociopaths don't have as much emotion so are generally more controlled.

HPD isn't as bad as bpd they are really just attention ***** sex addicts and are generally pretty open about that fact.

As for the rest of the questions, all of your milage may vary, bpd is on a spectrum starting with traits of all the way to the full blown disorder.

Girls with traits of bpd are pretty common bit more manageable especially if you know what you are dealing witg. Full blown is a lost cause.
 

Serenity

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@Infern0 gives good answers here. About having it naturally or developing it I'd say it's developed. It is very common they've experienced serious emotional trauma and are emotionally immature. To develop this far it's usually something that happened in their childhood and was left untreated. Such as when their family either didn't care or had the comptence to support their child emotionally.

Because it goes back to an early development stage in their life it can be said that BPD is deeply rooted. It may easily seem like they just are that way, as if they were born like that.

There is a reason for their tendency to rage, but their general rage is misplaced later in life. They are a victim to their emotions, they don't understand where their anger really comes from. Pinning it on trivial things in life is a way to avoid confronting the unbearable discomfort of their past, the true reason for their anger.

People aren't born with it, BPD is a result of painful experiences and an inability to cope with it. How bad their experience was and how much trouble they have coping with it determines how far up on the BPD scale they are. This is why some experience equally sh!tty things, but show no or few signs of BPD, they cope very well with it. That's the survivor role, they refuse to be victims and take control of themselves.
 

ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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They aren't the same as female sociopaths, although there is a lot of differences. Sociopaths don't have as much emotion so are generally more controlled.

HPD isn't as bad as bpd they are really just attention ***** sex addicts and are generally pretty open about that fact.

As for the rest of the questions, all of your milage may vary, bpd is on a spectrum starting with traits of all the way to the full blown disorder.

Girls with traits of bpd are pretty common bit more manageable especially if you know what you are dealing witg. Full blown is a lost cause.
@Infern0 gives good answers here. About having it naturally or developing it I'd say it's developed. It is very common they've experienced serious emotional trauma and are emotionally immature. To develop this far it's usually something that happened in their childhood and was left untreated. Such as when their family either didn't care or had the comptence to support their child emotionally.

Because it goes back to an early development stage in their life it can be said that BPD is deeply rooted. It may easily seem like they just are that way, as if they were born like that.

There is a reason for their tendency to rage, but their general rage is misplaced later in life. They are a victim to their emotions, they don't understand where their anger really comes from. Pinning it on trivial things in life is a way to avoid confronting the unbearable discomfort of their past, the true reason for their anger.

People aren't born with it, BPD is a result of painful experiences and an inability to cope with it. How bad their experience was and how much trouble they have coping with it determines how far up on the BPD scale they are. This is why some experience equally sh!tty things, but show no or few signs of BPD, they cope very well with it. That's the survivor role, they refuse to be victims and take control of themselves.
Ok so then can men have it too? Why is it more common in women (or so it seems at least)?
 

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Serenity

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Ok so then can men have it too? Why is it more common in women (or so it seems at least)?
Men can have it too, but it's commonly misdiagnosed even though the exact same traits and patterns are there. I actually know a guy who would very well fit the description.

The problem is that different psychological diagnosis have overlapping symptoms. Kinda like how different medical conditions have similar symptoms.

Maybe this would be useful to read http://namimc.org/male-borderline-personality-disorder-know/
 

Infern0

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@Infern0 gives good answers here. About having it naturally or developing it I'd say it's developed. It is very common they've experienced serious emotional trauma and are emotionally immature. To develop this far it's usually something that happened in their childhood and was left untreated. Such as when their family either didn't care or had the comptence to support their child emotionally.

Because it goes back to an early development stage in their life it can be said that BPD is deeply rooted. It may easily seem like they just are that way, as if they were born like that.

There is a reason for their tendency to rage, but their general rage is misplaced later in life. They are a victim to their emotions, they don't understand where their anger really comes from. Pinning it on trivial things in life is a way to avoid confronting the unbearable discomfort of their past, the true reason for their anger.

People aren't born with it, BPD is a result of painful experiences and an inability to cope with it. How bad their experience was and how much trouble they have coping with it determines how far up on the BPD scale they are. This is why some experience equally sh!tty things, but show no or few signs of BPD, they cope very well with it. That's the survivor role, they refuse to be victims and take control of themselves.
Yup.

My ex had bpd and traits of npd which only manifested occasionally.

She had wealthy parents who didn't really want her so as a kid she was spoiled with gifts etc but not shown any real love. She was also molested by another family member at a young age, several times. None of this was ever properly addressed.

It's not becoming of a true "alpha male" if that's what we want to call ourselves, to "hate" these people. But you have to recognize what you are dealing with and that A) it's bigger than you, and B) it's only them that can help themselves, and without monumental effort they won't get any better.

I don't even plate girls like this any more, I think it's in poor taste and going after the low hanging fruit.

If guys stopped ****ing these crazy bitches and left them alone they might actually seek help.
 

Infern0

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Ok so then can men have it too? Why is it more common in women (or so it seems at least)?
Men tend to form NPD instead.

Why?

Because it makes sense.

Dudes love a "damsel in distress" which is how bpds present

Women love a "arrogant **** charismatic guy" which is how npd presents

Same cause but different coping strategies.

BPD'S learn to use their femininity and vulnerability to deceive and manipulate as a survival mechanism from a young age

NPD learn to charm and impress to the same end.
 

Julian

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im definitelt on the npd scale or at least i was. i became self aware and changed myself.


bpd is sad man..these hoes dont stand a chance typically
 

Infern0

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im definitelt on the npd scale or at least i was. i became self aware and changed myself.


bpd is sad man..these hoes dont stand a chance typically
It is sad.

Don't get me wrong I hated mine for a while, or rather hated myself for letting her play me.

But we broke up 2 years ago and every time I get some sort of update it's always bad news. It's like watching someone weaving through traffic the wrong way on the highway. You know it's going to end bad but they won't stop.
 
B

BlueAlpha1

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It is sad.

Don't get me wrong I hated mine for a while, or rather hated myself for letting her play me.

But we broke up 2 years ago and every time I get some sort of update it's always bad news. It's like watching someone weaving through traffic the wrong way on the highway. You know it's going to end bad but they won't stop.
So @Infern0 , we've spoken about this before and you know my story. It's been 1.5 years for me now and I haven't heard as much as a word. Life has gone on, but she still comes to mind and I still think of her as having replaced me with Chad Thundercock despite being 35 and hitting that wall head on, or having reconciled with her ex from before me. I never heard from her again and swore my family to never bring it up, if in fact they had heard or seen. I never creeped on her social media and don't even know what state she lives in.

The curiousity never really goes away. I wouldn't reach out to her first if she were the last female on earth, but I do wonder dawg. Can't help it. And I do hope that one day her knee will buckle and she'll tip her hand and that I will be vindicated. Fool's good, I know, since I'm probably better off not knowing.
 

Infern0

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So @Infern0 , we've spoken about this before and you know my story. It's been 1.5 years for me now and I haven't heard as much as a word. Life has gone on, but she still comes to mind and I still think of her as having replaced me with Chad Thundercock despite being 35 and hitting that wall head on, or having reconciled with her ex from before me. I never heard from her again and swore my family to never bring it up, if in fact they had heard or seen. I never creeped on her social media and don't even know what state she lives in.

The curiousity never really goes away. I wouldn't reach out to her first if she were the last female on earth, but I do wonder dawg. Can't help it. And I do hope that one day her knee will buckle and she'll tip her hand and that I will be vindicated. Fool's good, I know, since I'm probably better off not knowing.
Yup I still think of mine very often. I don't think it'll ever go away 100% but I think it's like that with any intense experience that happened over a long period.

As long as it's not causing you any issues I wouldn't worry.
 

sazc

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I do not envy you guys having to weed thru the chicks like this. My ex MIL is BPD. We'ed get along great for a few days and then all of a sudden she would turn into another person entirely - leaving me wondering if I had done or said something that made her upset, even tho I know I hadn't. She was molested by her step dad at a young age and then mom chose step dad over her. She learned early that her needs didnt matter and would not be met. She passed on her BPD and dramatic flare to her 3 kids.

It's pretty crazy that the emotional push pull you guys talk about doing with females, to get them to attach to you, is exactly what these BPD chicks unwittingly do to you guys, and it works on you as well.
 

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LARaiders85

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Are BPDs the same as female socipoaths? Or is there a difference? They are a type of sociopath, but not the classic Antisocial Personality Disorder sociopath. And what is the difference between HPD and BPD? HPD don't have the mood swings that show violence. HPD attach less and show much less jealousy. Are some BPDs just naturally born with the disorder or is it always developed? Always developed, but you can be born with Bipolar disorder or certain types of brain damage which can seem similar....Do all BPDs have issues with other women, dislike their dads, have a lot of crazy baggage, etc? Yes Or are there any who just have it even though they have a somewhat decent relationship with their dad, no rape or abuse stories, have lots of female friends, etc? None that Ive heard of. And are there women who have all the bad signs of a BPD but don't actually have it? The average woman shows signs of NPD and the emotional irregularity and abandonment fears of BPD. Full blown cluster B is so much worse though, yet can be hard to detect in our degraded culture where egomania, attention wh0ring, and promiscuity are the norm. A lot of the times you guys describe women who gave you a hard time as BPD so I'm wondering the legitimacy of it. Anyway, please answer the questions.
In bold
 

wolf

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Once you have navigated through the snake pit that is a Cluster B relationship, all future engagements with 90% of women just become child's play.

You will no longer tolerate Bullchit
You will never let a woman rule your heart
You will never drop your guard
And you will never be side swiped when you least expect it..

IF YOU TAKE THE TIME TO HEAL!!!

Run out of one cluster B relationship and you will most likely run into another one.
Take time, heal, learn what drew her to you you and you to her, work through the trauma of childhood that your cluster B chick revealed to you and learn to move forward.

It's the only way!!

Peace
 

wolf

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Also the key to overcoming a cluster B ex is simple..

Learn to feel as good about yourself by yourself as your cluster b ex made you feel during the love bombing phase.

Learn to like yourself and accept yourself with all of your imperfections. Once you have attained this level of comfort in self then you will never get roped into the love bombing ever again. They rely heavily on guys who aren't happy in their own skin.

In my opinion and experience.. This can take anywhere from 18 months to 2 years if done properly.

Unfortunately this also means giving women a miss for a while until you have focused on and developed yourself. Women in this time will only distract you from yourself and will hinder your healing process. Yes this goes aginst most advice that I see on here but this is quite literally a matter of life or death!!
 
B

BlueAlpha1

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Yup I still think of mine very often. I don't think it'll ever go away 100% but I think it's like that with any intense experience that happened over a long period.

As long as it's not causing you any issues I wouldn't worry.
It does cause me issues. I have severe trust and commitment issues, even outside of relationships now. We try to achieve status just to impress others, but when we have a wall up and dont let others get too close, even chasing money or luxuries seem futile. I look at your average western woman with total contempt now. Since she left 18 months ago, I have only been able to be myself and have a good time with a couple foreign women in my travels. I don't know have to take this rigid edge off man, and the thoughts that she moved on and is doing better than me are reoccurring even in dreams...
 

usernamedox11

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It does cause me issues. I have severe trust and commitment issues, even outside of relationships now. We try to achieve status just to impress others, but when we have a wall up and dont let others get too close, even chasing money or luxuries seem futile. I look at your average western woman with total contempt now. Since she left 18 months ago, I have only been able to be myself and have a good time with a couple foreign women in my travels. I don't know have to take this rigid edge off man, and the thoughts that she moved on and is doing better than me are reoccurring even in dreams...
Man, don't even sweat it. She's a nasty person let some other idiot put up with her. As hot as she might be, it's all she has going for her, and that will be gone with age anyway.

Don't trust women in general dude. My great uncle was living with his daughter, and she kicked him out and called him a loser. This is after spending his life supporting her, and he is her father. Women, in general, are snakes. Just enjoy them for their body, and if you have one that might not be as big a snake as other girls, treat her very well the first time, then after that, treat her the same as she treats you. If all is good, let the relationship progress, but protect yourself at all costs because you are playing with fire when it comes to women. When you pick up a snake, don't be surprised when the snake bites you.
 
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