"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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A few questions for experienced guys.

HelpYourself

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There have been a couple threads recently about not being in game mode when out in the field. I have a similar problem though not the same. Even if I don't feel like opening, I open anyway. I just lack the desire to close. While I kind of have the right attitude "Have fun first, and if you get a number, even better" and don't go home thinking "what if," I'm too complacent now. The exact problem I had before. Before, you could see the desperation to meet a woman in my eyes. Now, it's just like "I'll do my own thing, and unless I see a girl I HAVE to talk to, I won't go the extra distance."

I think this has to do with media idealism and 10 idealism. I've seen a few women, celebrities, girls I've known in the past, and random strangers who to me were 10s without a doubt and it's caused me to be overly picky.

I mean, while the 10 gives you that extra attraction, there's nothing wrong with an 8 or 9. The last girl I dated was an 8.5 and while I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with her, she was prettier than most girls I'd see when we went out together.

My question for guys with a lot of experience...is sex with a woman you think is a 10, or a woman you really like significantly better than with the 8 or 9 that's better than most but you aren't crazy about?

Keep in mind, I approach the 8s and 9s, I just don't seem to care if nothing happens with them. Then I go home and think about the 10s.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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sodbuster

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If they know they are about a 7 or 8 [not thinking they are a 10], the sex is better[AVIS, we're #2,we try harder]. 10's usually think it is your "privilege to be there" and aren't as active.
 

Deniska

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From my personal experience, lower #, 6-8, the harder they try in bed.

The 10's are for those times when you want to bust a nut and throw them a side like a dirty underwear.

From what i have seen, many guys date LTR and marry an 8. And by the time a 10 hits the age of 30, they are more worn out then a 60 year olds.

In other words. Fvuck a 10, but marry an 8.
 

HelpYourself

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Well I mean 10 as in "your 10" not necessarily playboy/model or anything...let's say both are about the same attractiveness, neither are playboy or models, but one is a 10 to you and the other is an 8...is there that much of a difference in the sex?

I ask because when I masturbate there's a clear difference between porn I really like and porn I just kind of like. The sensation is much better the better I like the porn.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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HelpYourself

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Well go to love.com if you want a discussion on inner beauty.

And unless you're dating fatties, you have no right to talk.

Btw...of course personality matters, but I'm not talking about looking for someone to spend years with. I'm not in my 30s or 40s.
 
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