nicksaiz65
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 27, 2017
- Messages
- 3,826
- Reaction score
- 1,506
- Age
- 28
Not too eventful of a night, but I still wanted to write a FR. I definitely made some mistakes and I wanted to get some feedback on them, plus share for learning.
My wing/roommate wanted to come out to this session again, looks like he's coming out to the weekend ones again. We got out at a reasonable time: a bit closer to midnight this time though.
We went to our usual bar and did a few approaches on the way. Mostly blowouts up to this point. I then saw another goth-type girl and approached her directly ("Hey, thought you were cute and wanted to meet you.") My wing occupied the unattractive friend.
The vibe was awesome. The conversation flowed easily and we had a lot of similar interest. We shared where we were from, our interests, talked about the scene, art(she was an artsy type of girl), differences between Nashville and NY, her showing me her art, so on and so forth. I kept the conversation flirtatious as well. The body language was excellent, and I made sure to be physical as well. It seemed like she was feeling me, she made the conversation easy and reciprocated touching. She also started asking me questions near the end of the interaction too, which is always a good sign. She mentioned how I had the exact same name as her ex of 5 years, how she always ends up dating musicians and making their cover art(I'm a retired musician myself)... She was also making sexual references about how I was "raw dogging my phone" (by not having a case and having it cracked, it is what it is
)
The mistake I made was not pushing hard enough for the pull. What I SHOULD'VE said is "Drinks here are expensive. I'm feeling the vibe, I live close by. We should go rip some shots and then come back." Then I could've pulled my wing in, and updated him with the plans. Then I could've held my girls hand and walked with her to the car. Then I could've gone for the close at the afterparty.
Instead, I got her number and said "we're having an afterparty later on tonight. You should come through." I got her number (on which she insisted on taking a picture with me and putting a bunch of emojis in my phone) and she was like "that picture is so cute!"
As I type this out, I'm realizing that this was a major fumble. Rookie mistake. I don't know what I was thinking going for the number instead of the pull. I guess I was thinking that we should do other sets too or I shouldn't be in this set all night? But that's incorrect, I need to strike while the iron is hot. I have to remember that the Pull is always Plan A and a number is a last resort. I need to be pushing HARD for the pull.
Getting a number and then meeting up with them later seems to not be ideal. That's not how it works, I need to be pushing really hard for the pull right then and get the number as a last resort. I ended up getting the number and I invited her, but she didn't come through. She said "We're tired so we'll pass on drinks, but it was so nice to meet you
" I tried to setup a margarita date for during the week but it's extremely likely she'll flake. I REALLY have to strike while the iron is hot.
Basically, in this situation, I'm being too passive, and not leading hard enough, that's why it failed.
We had another two set that seemed to hook pretty well. They were "going to another bar then going home." It was a good vibe between all of us as well. I suppose we could've gone with them to that bar and then invited them back to the afterparty? We opted not to go with them, though.
So, that's my self assessment. Just wanted to type this up so I don't forget these mistakes in the future, and maybe a bit of feedback as well.
My wing/roommate wanted to come out to this session again, looks like he's coming out to the weekend ones again. We got out at a reasonable time: a bit closer to midnight this time though.
We went to our usual bar and did a few approaches on the way. Mostly blowouts up to this point. I then saw another goth-type girl and approached her directly ("Hey, thought you were cute and wanted to meet you.") My wing occupied the unattractive friend.
The vibe was awesome. The conversation flowed easily and we had a lot of similar interest. We shared where we were from, our interests, talked about the scene, art(she was an artsy type of girl), differences between Nashville and NY, her showing me her art, so on and so forth. I kept the conversation flirtatious as well. The body language was excellent, and I made sure to be physical as well. It seemed like she was feeling me, she made the conversation easy and reciprocated touching. She also started asking me questions near the end of the interaction too, which is always a good sign. She mentioned how I had the exact same name as her ex of 5 years, how she always ends up dating musicians and making their cover art(I'm a retired musician myself)... She was also making sexual references about how I was "raw dogging my phone" (by not having a case and having it cracked, it is what it is
The mistake I made was not pushing hard enough for the pull. What I SHOULD'VE said is "Drinks here are expensive. I'm feeling the vibe, I live close by. We should go rip some shots and then come back." Then I could've pulled my wing in, and updated him with the plans. Then I could've held my girls hand and walked with her to the car. Then I could've gone for the close at the afterparty.
Instead, I got her number and said "we're having an afterparty later on tonight. You should come through." I got her number (on which she insisted on taking a picture with me and putting a bunch of emojis in my phone) and she was like "that picture is so cute!"
As I type this out, I'm realizing that this was a major fumble. Rookie mistake. I don't know what I was thinking going for the number instead of the pull. I guess I was thinking that we should do other sets too or I shouldn't be in this set all night? But that's incorrect, I need to strike while the iron is hot. I have to remember that the Pull is always Plan A and a number is a last resort. I need to be pushing HARD for the pull.
Getting a number and then meeting up with them later seems to not be ideal. That's not how it works, I need to be pushing really hard for the pull right then and get the number as a last resort. I ended up getting the number and I invited her, but she didn't come through. She said "We're tired so we'll pass on drinks, but it was so nice to meet you
Basically, in this situation, I'm being too passive, and not leading hard enough, that's why it failed.
We had another two set that seemed to hook pretty well. They were "going to another bar then going home." It was a good vibe between all of us as well. I suppose we could've gone with them to that bar and then invited them back to the afterparty? We opted not to go with them, though.
So, that's my self assessment. Just wanted to type this up so I don't forget these mistakes in the future, and maybe a bit of feedback as well.