40 yo asking about marriage. Only reply if you are 35+ yo

escaleraroyal

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Let me ask you the most important question that I know of.

When you look at marriage, do you have that vision where there is team work and working together? How you answer will tell me everything I need to know about you.
I dunno.
 

Epic Days

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Understood. Well look at it and see what the reason is.
Marriage does not equal monogamy. Marriage will not commit a woman to you. So if you are doing it for that reason, then you aren’t aware of the world.

If you do think that there will be team work and working together due to being married...it’s not true and your vision of marriage is slanted by social conditioning.

The only purpose of marriage, is for having children and raising them if you look at it in a traditional way.

The purpose of a man being married is for a woman to bear him children. Yet in modern think, he rarely owns them. Meaning that he is saddled with the responsibility (financial) but the woman retains ownership by default.

You might want to figure out “why” you want to be married and be honest with yourself about those reasons.
 

Mauser96

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I'm 40 yo, financially stable, mastered game, and have a gf (31 yo). Should I marry her? Do not reply with irrelevant answers.
Does she make as much or more than you?

Does she have less debt than you?

Does she have more assets than you?

If the answer is "no" then tread cautiously.

Unless you like working until you are 75


Let me tell you, financially, from a strictly practical point of view how it goes. Once you are married, the hook is set. Most of your leverage is now gone, as you have removed all competition anxiety. She will push for kids, and once she has them, the hook is set deeper and you have lost 100% of your leverage.

The woman that you marry is never the woman that divorces you. People change.

And the family courts will teach you a hard lesson in "fairness" and equitable distribution of assets"
 
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Mauser96

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mrgoodstuff

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Menopause aint no joke. They get more controlling when the sexual function is reduced. I think control is used for pleasure. Many also cant even decide to please their man orally when the sex drive died with menopause. They see no use. So less agreeable, more testosterone, no sex drive and more controlling. God...
 

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Focal core

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Theres no rush to marriage. You can put a ring on her finger if shes been a loyal and committed woman for some years but take your time in marriage. Theres no race. There are a few states with favorable divorce laws. Consider them. Are her friends married? Are they cheating? What about her parents? Does she spend money, time and energy on you? How does she add to your life?
Well said
 
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