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38 and still a virgin....advice for the 1st time

bat soup

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That is not realistic. Hop on a plane to go somewhere is never an option. You have Covid, local crime issues of the area, suppose you don't go travelling, like travelling or can't afford to travel? Why pick Amsterdam and not the Philippines or Thailand where someone might use their JBW card and get laid for free?


How would you know that? Did you actually go there?
He can go wherever is convenient for him in whatever area of the world he lives in. Amsterdam is convenient for Europe. Travel might be necessary because the laws vary by state and country. If he's waited 38 years he can wait a few more months for the black death to go away.

Of course I myself would never do such an imoral thing. I wouldn't go to Tijuana and pay 70$ to take a girl upstairs at Adela's or pay 20$ for a BJ in Vietnam either. Another place I wouldn't go is Cambodia.
 

corrector

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He can go wherever is convenient for him in whatever area of the world he lives in. Amsterdam is convenient for Europe. Travel might be necessary because the laws vary by state and country. If he's waited 38 years he can wait a few more months for the black death to go away.

Of course I myself would never do such an imoral thing. I wouldn't go to Tijuana and pay 70$ to take a girl upstairs at Adela's or pay 20$ for a BJ in Vietnam either. Another place I wouldn't go is Cambodia.
I didn't read that he lives in Europe? Most posters on here are from the US from what I know so it has an American/Western vibe, where things are more prudish here, in terms of those types of arrangements.

I don't get your logic. You saying it's immoral to pay $ 70, or $ 20, but it's okay to pay $ 50 EUROS in Amsterdam? Where do you draw the line on your personal moral boundaries? They are just $ 20-$30 apart either way.
 

bat soup

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I didn't read that he lives in Europe? Most posters on here are from the US from what I know so it has an American/Western vibe, where things are more prudish here, in terms of those types of arrangements.

I don't get your logic. You saying it's immoral to pay $ 70, or $ 20, but it's okay to pay $ 50 EUROS in Amsterdam? Where do you draw the line on your personal moral boundaries? They are just $ 20-$30 apart either way.
It's not that you don't get the logic. It's that you take everything literally and can't recognise sarcasm.

Regarding location, I don't know where he is. I assume most likely USA or UK. It doesn't matter. Wherever you are in the world there are places where it's easy to get laid if you're willing to pay.

Most of the time, you end up paying anyway (bars, dates, time spent etc).
 

corrector

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It's not that you don't get the logic. It's that you take everything literally and can't recognise sarcasm.
I think you don't recognize sarcasm either since making a comparison of dollar amounts was not the point. You mentioned other seedy third world locations that you feel the woman are more likely to have been kidnapped and work as sex slaves, child-prostitution, or other borderline stuff that would be sickening to the conscience.

You think Amsterdam is clean and no organized crime or trafficking happens there?

You feel Amsterdam is better because you do not feel you are dealing with a sex-slave and feel it's a woman who choose to be there and this is her first career choice because the money is better than McDonalds with her limited range of experience or education, or the state of the job market. After all, Europe is a first world country and people working in a legalized district are likely there because they want to be.

The other countries, because they are third world countries have more deeper pockets of poverty and bad wealth gaps, so you go in there as a white tourist and feel like every woman is for sale at the right price and the whole set-up feels immoral. It somehow feels like you are taking advantage of someone. It's below your morals.

You are trying to make a point then make it. The problem is you keep putting your head in the sand rather than finish what may be a constructive or productive argument you are trying to make. Why would you joke about groping women on the other thread? How is that being sarcastic? That's being sick.
 

Travel memoir21

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I think you don't recognize sarcasm either since making a comparison of dollar amounts was not the point. You mentioned other seedy third world locations that you feel the woman are more likely to have been kidnapped and work as sex slaves, child-prostitution, or other borderline stuff that would be sickening to the conscience.

You think Amsterdam is clean and no organized crime or trafficking happens there?

You feel Amsterdam is better because you do not feel you are dealing with a sex-slave and feel it's a woman who choose to be there and this is her first career choice because the money is better than McDonalds with her limited range of experience or education, or the state of the job market. After all, Europe is a first world country and people working in a legalized district are likely there because they want to be.

The other countries, because they are third world countries have more deeper pockets of poverty and bad wealth gaps, so you go in there as a white tourist and feel like every woman is for sale at the right price and the whole set-up feels immoral. It somehow feels like you are taking advantage of someone. It's below your morals.

You are trying to make a point then make it. The problem is you keep putting your head in the sand rather than finish what may be a constructive or productive argument you are trying to make. Why would you joke about groping women on the other thread? How is that being sarcastic? That's being sick.

What do you think and recommend is the best route for this guy to take? Should he cold approach? build a social circle to meet women? online dating? etc.
 

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corrector

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What do you think and recommend is the best route for this guy to take? Should he cold approach? build a social circle to meet women? online dating? etc.
I lost my v card with my ex wife and we divorced after. Guess I went the Las Vegas route.
 

The Don

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I am 38 and still a virgin.
I could go on and on but in a nutshell I was abused by my parents and they tried to make me stay a boy forever.

Getting over the abuse has been slow and steady but I am doing it. I quit drinking 2 years ago and it has boosted my self esteem a great deal.

Not too long ago I came to the conclusion that there is nothing wrong with me and that there is no big mystery to getting a woman.....just put yourself in places to meet them and it will happen.

Because I could have potentially lost my virginity so long ago I have probably been overthinking this.

I have read Sex for dummies and a few other books about sex.
I also have water based lube and have been practicing with getting a condom on as I masterbate.

Any advice?
Thanks in advance.
You just need to clear your head of any stigma about being a virgin and tell anyone to **** off who tells you otherwise.

But in all seriousness, just get in the habit of talking to woman, get comfortable with them. Talk to any woman, ones in the workplace, ones you bump into out in the street, through friends, at the beach, when your on holiday trips, whatever. Even ones your not interested in, just talk about anything with them.

Try not to overthink things, once you get comfortable then you can start taking things further with them by asking them out for a drink or lunch, something simple.

Then just take things as they go from there, let it run its course naturally, and don't get hung up on the ones that say no.

At this stage, don't think about the sex, just focus on speaking with woman. Once you get to the actual part of having sex, just go with the flow, it should come naturally to you, instincts will take over.

I still remember my first time, had no idea what I was doing, but it was ****ing awesome, was about 30 mins or so of foreplay and teasing, woman love foreplay, don't forget that, doggy style too, and I had to go twice I was that horny hahah. I was 25 at the time and she was 23.
 

7onriverI f

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Don't tell women in general that your a virgin.
Don't tell women in general that you have banged hookers if your not a virgin.

Those two rules will help you.
 

bat soup

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I think you don't recognize sarcasm either since making a comparison of dollar amounts was not the point. You mentioned other seedy third world locations that you feel the woman are more likely to have been kidnapped and work as sex slaves, child-prostitution, or other borderline stuff that would be sickening to the conscience.

You think Amsterdam is clean and no organized crime or trafficking happens there?

You feel Amsterdam is better because you do not feel you are dealing with a sex-slave and feel it's a woman who choose to be there and this is her first career choice because the money is better than McDonalds with her limited range of experience or education, or the state of the job market. After all, Europe is a first world country and people working in a legalized district are likely there because they want to be.

The other countries, because they are third world countries have more deeper pockets of poverty and bad wealth gaps, so you go in there as a white tourist and feel like every woman is for sale at the right price and the whole set-up feels immoral. It somehow feels like you are taking advantage of someone. It's below your morals.

You are trying to make a point then make it. The problem is you keep putting your head in the sand rather than finish what may be a constructive or productive argument you are trying to make. Why would you joke about groping women on the other thread? How is that being sarcastic? That's being sick.
Why would I joke about something? Because it´s funny. That's all. I don't care about any of this stuff that you're talking about.
 

Suave88

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I didn't read that he lives in Europe? Most posters on here are from the US from what I know so it has an American/Western vibe, where things are more prudish here, in terms of those types of arrangements.

I don't get your logic. You saying it's immoral to pay $ 70, or $ 20, but it's okay to pay $ 50 EUROS in Amsterdam? Where do you draw the line on your personal moral boundaries? They are just $ 20-$30 apart either way.
You will only fvck a banana tree for 70 in Amsterdam.....
 

corrector

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Why would I joke about something? Because it´s funny. That's all. I don't care about any of this stuff that you're talking about.
Ok putting you on ignore because you are a joke.
 

Suave88

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If that's what floats your boat, I'm sure it can be arranged.
I meant to say 70 won't get you none. I will not have sex with any escort that cost me less than 400. 70 sounds like street HIV, drugged pimped up, tattood, homeless, starving hooker. You only get nice puss for 70 in Russia and not in the Western hemisphere.
 

bat soup

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I meant to say 70 won't get you none. I will not have sex with any escort that cost me less than 400. 70 sounds like street HIV, drugged pimped up, tattood, homeless, starving hooker. You only get nice puss for 70 in Russia and not in the Western hemisphere.
I don't think it's worth it to pay 400 Euros for 10 minutes of pleasure. In Athens you can get it for 20 Euros. Price doesn't guarantee quality.
 

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Suave88

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I don't think it's worth it to pay 400 Euros for 10 minutes of pleasure. In Athens you can get it for 20 Euros. Price doesn't guarantee quality.
I never said 400 for 10 minutes, and 10 minutes is not enough.
 

bat soup

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I never said 400 for 10 minutes, and 10 minutes is not enough.
If you feel like you're getting value for your money, that's what's up.

I remember Roosh used to talk about "cost per notch" and he worked it out on a spreadsheet.

I reckon most guys could spend over $500 on going out to bars just to get laid once with a fatty
 

Mike32ct

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If you feel like you're getting value for your money, that's what's up.

I remember Roosh used to talk about "cost per notch" and he worked it out on a spreadsheet.

I reckon most guys could spend over $500 on going out to bars just to get laid once with a fatty
It's just human nature. If a guy is hiring a prostie, he is typically cost conscious.

If he is picking up women "for free," his brain (or perhaps ego) doesn't want to entertain the total cost involved.*

*Assuming he isn't some Chad/Tyrone who can pull it off very cheaply by picking up at a friend's house party, or an online chick coming to his house, or worst-case buying one drink and uber from a bar/club.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I am pretty anti psychology and therapy especially given the nature of the corruption in the industry, APA, and a number of other things. Given the fact bud is the 40yr old virgin, i highly advise seeking therapy from a Shawn T Smith or Dr Helen Smith type of rp therapist to exercise whatever trauma you have to move forward.
 
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