"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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2nd date upcoming, already had sex, yet still nervous.

Jaylan

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Basically I had a so-so first date with a girl recently. Honestly, the fact that we even had sex was surprising, as I didn't feel much of a click for the entire date up until the end where I basically just said fvk it and made a move. I gotta be honest and say we were both awkward and nervous through different points of the evening...and almost like inexperienced teenagers.

And tbh, that never happens to me. Conversation usually flows easily, and Im more confident, bold, and flirty throughout the evening. But it was hard getting a vibe off this girl at the time.

Now usually a kiss, and especially sex with a girl washes away all that nervousness and lack of familiarity between us...but I still feel unsure about this girl. Im not sure exactly how to approach things. Part of it is that she does seem a bit quieter and shyer than she was over text (we met online). And even liquid courage (alcohol), didn't have the same effect on me when I was with her last week.

Im wondering is this is really just one of those situations where you simply dont click with someone and I should be ok with that. Or if I can put myself in a better mindset and maybe build upon last week. And tbh, if I didn't try to kiss her for the hell of it during the first date, we'd likely not have gone out again...or just remained friends only.

I went for it because I felt "only way to know if there's any chemistry in any capacity, is to kiss her". So there's a little something there...but things are still up in the air.

Ever have a so-so first date, but a better 2nd date with someone? I guess Im just trying to get in the right mindset tonight...so positive thoughts breed positive outcomes.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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kenpiffyjr

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 3, 2011
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If the chick is quiet and shy, she's quiet and shy. You have to ask yourself what are you looking for in this situation. If you understand that you can't be romantically involved with a broad that's timid and reserved, then act accordingly and just understand that she's possibly just a good Fwb.Do not complain to her or ask her why she's so reserved and won't open up to you...that's a fools game. Take her as her worth. If she keep throwing you ass, just keep catching it. Keep your eyes and options open for chicks you click with who have more of a personality that you gravitate to.
 
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