Bonhomme
Master Don Juan
I fourth Francisco, Fash, and Jackman. Enjoy!
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Man, that is FUBAR.Ace of Flames said:Only on this site will you find guys turning down free food and a night with a hot girl.
Good lord.
In other words, pay for all her shyt like an ATM.mrRuckus said:take care of her
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Although it is true that the majority of women prefer to be with a man that can take care of her but I believe the ones who feel that they could do the same for their man (in more ways than one and shows it) is more valuable. I stay away from women who believe that all it takes is money.mrRuckus said:A girl told me not that long ago she wants the guy to pay because "a girl wants to think that a guy can take care of her"![]()
Why are you so concerned about it?? If she wants to pay let her pay. Your main concern is gauge and see her interest in you throughout the date and the end of the date. So far all indications points to high interest level because (holding a megaphone): "SHEEE WANTSS TO SEEEE YOUUU!!!". If she didn't want to see you then you wouldn't have a date and it would indicate low interest.trance_addict said:So I think she's trying to "pay me back", for some reason. I'm a gentleman so of course I'll try to talk her out of it, just a bit strange that she'd behave this way.
KillaCam said:Yeesh, that's a cunning little bugger of a test.
As our red-rounded friend above said, still offer to pay your half, it's common manners. If she still insists, then go blow your money on beer, or something just as productive :woo:
Good luck![]()
00Kevin said:She might be doing this out of guilt for the last time you paid.
I would consider her to be a waste of my time already. Any woman that feels the need to prove to me that she can pay is insecure.
Just keep in mind that this isn't a good thing. She is already trying to compete with you and be ‘the man’. Worst of all she has planned this with you already.
I’ll put my money on this date being the last one.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I find that true. Most or certain dates i've been on, if a girl is really is interested, she will offer to pay if she can stand on her own 2 feet. However in most cases it's better being the bigger man to offer your half or pay the whole tab. if she likes you she'll agree, and mention something about paying 'next time'...an IOI that there will be a next time.Francisco d'Anconia said:Although it is true that the majority of women prefer to be with a man that can take care of her but I believe the ones who feel that they could do the same for their man (in more ways than one and shows it) is more valuable. I stay away from women who believe that all it takes is money.
I don't agree. The best way is not to treat a woman like she is so special just because she has a pvssy but treat her the way you treat any person you like such a friend. If I go out drinking with my buddy, I sometimes buy him a few drinks and sometimes he buys me. An extra $10-$20 dollars don't make a whole lot of a different if you are a working person. If you don't have even small amount of money for drinks, then you shouldn't be going out on a date but looking for a job.ScrewIt said:no matter if a woman pulls out her wallet and lays a 20$ on the tab, it's the guys job to push that $20 back or at least insist on paying.
ScrewIt said:no matter if a woman pulls out her wallet and lays a 20$ on the tab, it's the guys job to push that $20 back or at least insist on paying. One may not realize it, but women read into these little things as part of the bigger picture.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Most women today expect men to be total AFC pussies who will do...whatever they expect them to do like little puppies eager to please. Who cares what they expect though? Be the MAN you're supposed to be! :box:ScrewIt said:most/all of them said they expected a guy to cover the first date.
no matter if a woman pulls out her wallet and lays a 20$ on the tab, it's the guys job to push that $20 back or at least insist on paying. One may not realize it, but women read into these little things as part of the bigger picture.
I agree that women read into many "little" things but exactly what may that be (and especially for only $20). Any guy, of any age, of any character (AFC or DJ) can easily lay a twenty on a table, it takes no personality what so ever. I can think of many other effective and more memorable ways to differentiate myself.ScrewIt said:...no matter if a woman pulls out her wallet and lays a 20$ on the tab, it's the guys job to push that $20 back or at least insist on paying. One may not realize it, but women read into these little things as part of the bigger picture.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.