"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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2 great dates and f-close - now gone cold?

T

tomato

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What would you guys do? Thanks.

Went on to really fun dates with ex (3 years together, broken up 8 weeks was NC for 6 weeks) and f-close on second date (clear very BIG IOI). She loved it all and said she was sad to leave the second time. It was great. Then I could tell she was hesitant so wanted to try a bit of a freeze out and said we shouldnt see each other anymore - she called that and said ok. Then folded after half a week and she texted she missed me..... I tried going full contact again but doesnt want to meet up again -"I need to get over you" "I dont trust myslef around you" "I dont want to hurt you anymore"

Then we texted/chatted useless chat a few days before yesterday - didnt want to meet up "needs to get over me".

I have stopped texting her - she will get back to me - how do I handle this when she does? I cant invite her for a date cause that sets up chasing frame, I cant just ignore her totally - she is gaming other guys and going out all the time to get over the pain/lonliness - she will just fall back on another guy if she gets lonely again...... How would you guys act when she gets back to you with "I miss you" or something similar?

Been a week since the f-close now. Is there a problem with momentum being lost here no? How soon do you contact a girl after your second date f-close? What would you do on 3rd date - would you ask hre out?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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G

garruk

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what do you want out of this? you need to make that clear.


after a long relationship like the one you mentioned, its very likely that she misses you. but it is a fleeting feeling and will pass as soon as another guy comes along.

she's not interested in anything long term. fact.

in your shoes, i would move on with my life. if she initiates contact, go ahead and see what happens. but the less you care, the more success you're going to have here.
 
I

IamJosan

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Keep the NC going, but step up your game. That way if you do see her again she will feel that you're better and will be more attracted to you.
 
T

The_411

Master Don Juan
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She's not interested. She was curious and probably was reminiscing over the good times you had and when you met up she felt good but in all honesty she probably felt the same stuff she felt when you two initally broke up. She can vibe you're interested in something long term and she's in no palce to do that.

As mentioned move on go NC chances of making it work are like 0.00001%

Why not start anew with someone who havea better shot with... of course if you think you'll win the lottery by all means proceed.
 
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