"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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1st "date" didn't go quite as planned, now what?

H

HardLeftHook

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Ok, I randomly approached this girl at my college I've wanted to talk to for months, and asked her to lunch. She said yes, and we met up. I was a little more awkward than I had anticipated(no C&F), but she was pretty friendly throughout at least. I'm terrible with 1st impressions. She's taking the next semester off for monetary reasons, but will return the next. I guess, I'm wondering if I can turn it around, or are first impressions powerful enough to keep me trapped.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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O

Onlyliveonce

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It is out of your control, let it go. The more you obsess and try to hookup with her the further you will drive her away. Let her contact you or it's over. No texts, calls, emails or "accidentally" bumping into her. Get another woman, then another. Then she will be back. Watch the movie Swingers.
 
T

tihash

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IIRC, in Swingers, the dude's LTR broke up with him.

If I am reading the OP correctly, he had one lunch date with this girl.

OP, if you don't call or text her, she will never call or text you. Ask her out again. On the next date, make it a night time date and make sure you try to kiss her.
 
F

Falcon25

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Hook,

Here are the people who go to lunches; COUPLES, GAYS, WORK FRIENDS

It was weird and awkward because one collegiate special magic potion was missing (alcohol).

Ask her for drinks. Show her your relaxed side. See what happens. Don't watch any movies. Just listen to this' ALCOHOL EQUALS SEX, FOOD EQUALS SLEEP. Be the fun guy. You can turn this around, but you have to be the fun, sexy, and cool guy. She is attracted to you, but just doesn't like you cause you are boring. DON'T BE BORING.
 
H

HardLeftHook

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wow haha these are very different responses I'll say this
1. I'm worried, by /asking out/texting/faceb'ing, I'll be nothing but an annoying orbiter. but....
2. I don't want to abandon this. I'm just not a fan of giving up. I'll still be seeing her almost everyday so i can at least try to build something.
3. Neither of us drink so that's out of the question
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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P

perseverance

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Mistake 1) You planned how the date should go.
Mistake 2) You are overanalysing the situation.

Dates are meant to be fun, they aren't mean to be perfect and having a few nerves is okay, but it's not okay to allow these nerves to dictate you. You need to exercise the art form that is self control.

First impressions count, but if you are overanalysing things and trying to come across as perfect what you are doing is sabotaging things for yourself. I would say leave this woman on the backburner and go on more dates with different women. Don't worry about scoring, just concentrate on building confidence. Confidence is the key to happiness. Truly confident people are happy people.

Never, under any circumstances analyse your dates afterwards, when you come home, take off your shoes, sit down and just zone out.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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