"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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12 bonk rule.....

2Rocky

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Sex mathematician Clio Cresswell's rule for how many partners you should have before you settle down.

 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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bmp2cpm

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One of my main life rules is never rely on any kind of relationship advice from a woman.

Nice girls always say nice things. Nice things never helped any man in the history of civilization.
 

SW15

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This rule has no merit. Women with multiple notches often lack the ability to pair bond long term. While all relationships can be viewed as transient, women with higher notch counts are more likely to have failed longer term relationships.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

AureliusMaximus

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Listening to a fish telling how to fish in the waters must be one of the greatest definition of stupidity...
 
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Gamisch

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This rule has no merit. Women with multiple notches often lack the ability to pair bond long term. While all relationships can be viewed as transient, women with higher notch counts are more likely to have failed longer term relationships.
It's not clear whether she talks about 12 notches or 12 partners . Quite the difference. She might have 12 notches before 18.

12 partners on the other hand might take many years. And would be crazy advice to say to take your first 12 partners/ relationships with a grain of salt.

On the other hand, strangely enough she might be on something, as this seems to be exactly what most women do nowadays. Settle after 30.
 

SW15

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It's not clear whether she talks about 12 notches or 12 partners . Quite the difference. She might have 12 notches before 18.

12 partners on the other hand might take many years. And would be crazy advice to say to take your first 12 partners/ relationships with a grain of salt.

On the other hand, strangely enough she might be on something, as this seems to be exactly what most women do nowadays. Settle after 30.
I think she was referring to 12 different partners. Or at least evaluating 12 different men over an extended period of time, possibly not having sex with all of them. But it would entail multiple dates in the evaluation.

I do find her physically attractive with a nice tan and arms. The face looks aged. She is 45 now as she was 36 in 2013.


I did watch this. Her "12 bonk rule" is based on an equation predicting marital stability for 6 years. If the marriage is 6 years long, total relationship time is 8-10 years. That equation might not have any merit in predicting marital stability after 6 years. Nor does that mathmatical relationship predict the quality of the interaction during those 6 years. It just predicts for staying together for 6 years in a committed marriage and it assumes quality exists if the marriage part of the relationship lasts 6 years.

Marriages aren't supposed to last 6 years. Divorce risk doesn't evaporate after 6 years of marriage or 8-10 years of relationship time.
 

Gamisch

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I think she was referring to 12 different partners. Or at least evaluating 12 different men over an extended period of time, possibly not having sex with all of them. But it would entail multiple dates in the evaluation.

I do find her physically attractive with a nice tan and arms. The face looks aged. She is 45 now as she was 36 in 2013.




I did watch this. Her "12 bonk rule" is based on an equation predicting marital stability for 6 years. If the marriage is 6 years long, total relationship time is 8-10 years. That equation might not have any merit in predicting marital stability after 6 years. Nor does that mathmatical relationship predict the quality of the interaction during those 6 years. It just predicts for staying together for 6 years in a committed marriage and it assumes quality exists if the marriage part of the relationship lasts 6 years.

Marriages aren't supposed to last 6 years. Divorce risk doesn't evaporate after 6 years of marriage or 8-10 years of relationship time.
You mention age, and maybe that's the elephant in the room. A 25 year old woman might have the urgent need to move way faster in life than a 25 y.o man. So its probably a mixture of dating, ONS, and relationships she talks about.

About the movie: Unfortunately, this seems to be about the maximum lifespan of modern LTR's. So in a morbid way it makes sense.
 

SW15

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this seems to be about the maximum lifespan of modern LTR's. So in a morbid way it makes sense.
I have written extensively about my hypothesis that the shelf life of the good part of modern LTRs is roughly 5 years.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Gamisch

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I have written extensively about my hypothesis that the shelf life of the good part of modern LTRs is roughly 5 years.
Yes you wrote about it, and it's true.
 

Bokanovsky

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This has to be the dumbest advice I’ve ever heard. Not surprised that it comes from a woman who describes herself as a “sex mathematician”.
 
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