SELF-MASTERY
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2004
- Messages
- 1,971
- Reaction score
- 7
The nastiest thing that I have every done is.........
taste my own shyt and my own urine.
taste my own shyt and my own urine.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
The NASTIEST thing that you have done
- Thread starter SELF-MASTERY
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
MetalFortress
Master Don Juan
Thank you for sharing, sicko.
amadoodisforrealz
Banned
- Joined
- Aug 6, 2006
- Messages
- 30
- Reaction score
- 0
you troll?
that is bad stuff
that is bad stuff
TyTe`EyEs
Master Don Juan
This must be Mastery's attempt at getting banned. It was inevitable...
SELF-MASTERY
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2004
- Messages
- 1,971
- Reaction score
- 7
yeah right...TyTe`EyEs said:
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
SELF-MASTERY
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2004
- Messages
- 1,971
- Reaction score
- 7
Did you make it up to her??? I know she was pissed at you.Taviii said:
I want a bidet because I dont believe that toilet tissue does a good job at fully cleaning my ass, so I normally sit on the sink and use it to wash my ass. I not only do this at home, but everywhere, and that includes at my friends houses, my gf's, and sometimes in public restrooms.
Vulpine
Master Don Juan
I, for one, don't find this as nasty as many people would.SELF-MASTERY said:
I have heard their are certain benefits to drinking your morning urine. Don't ask me to expand on that, though. And no, I haven't done it myself.
As for tasting your own sh!t, why not? Every time you go out to eat, you taste other peoples' sh!t. Fuqing people never wash their hands after wiping their ass, handling money, etc.
:cuss:
Oh, and if you've licked a chix ass... there you go.
Mmmm... E.Coli salad sandwiches at Subway... good eatin'! No wonder the Subway diet works: diarrhea
Hell, I can't go out to eat anywhere without going home and blasting hot, frothy jets of liquid fire through a screen door. One could say that the nastiest thing they have done is eaten at a fast food restaurant... hella-nasty.
Anyway, the nastiest thing I've done? Aside from eating fast food, butchering animals, shoveling manure, and eating raw foods like eggs and sushi, uh... I guess there was this time that I got snowballed during naughty-drunken sex. I thought that was pretty nasty. I can't really comment on how good or bad it tasted: it's not like I'm a connoiseur and have tasted any other loads to compare it to.
Oh, I flipped out, btw. I basically threw the b!tch across the room off of the bed, pinned her down, and spit it back out all over her face - like a "3rd hand money shot".
Then I got up and got a big drink of water.
:dryheave:
SELF-MASTERY
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2004
- Messages
- 1,971
- Reaction score
- 7
I think that an open salad bar has to be the nastiest thing... I read that most door knobs and money have traces of fecal bacteria. I am a habitual hand washer, and I've never touched the door knob of a public restroom...
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Vulpine
Master Don Juan
Oh man, I'm a sick fuq then... I've listened to the whole Aqua album.Desdinova said:
"You can brush my hair, undress me everywhe-e-ere..."
That's right... come on, Barbie - let's go party.
pooparu
Senior Don Juan
**** that man, barbie girl rules 
. Get the bangbros techno remix (not the porn artist ), that **** is great. Search bangbros barbie girl.
And SM, damn man I'm trying to think of soemthing to best that.
What did that c*m taste like though man, I'm too ***** to taste my own lol.
. Get the bangbros techno remix (not the porn artist ), that **** is great. Search bangbros barbie girl.And SM, damn man I'm trying to think of soemthing to best that.
What did that c*m taste like though man, I'm too ***** to taste my own lol.
Vulpine
Master Don Juan
Warm and full-bodied, with earthy, nutty overtones and hints of berries that dwindle to a bitter, smokey finish...pooparu said:
Come on, dude, what the fuq do you want me to tell you?
It's bitter, salty, and gives you a weird stinging, scratchy feeling in your throat. Everyone has different tastes - some don't like olives, pineapple, or coconut. So, some people spit, some swallow... Mine might taste like pumpkin pie compared to some others - I wouldn't know.
Try your own spunk and get back to us, pooparu. Go. Now. Go shake one out into a shot glass and neck it.
“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.
SELF-MASTERY
Banned
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2004
- Messages
- 1,971
- Reaction score
- 7
I have a confession......... I think Ashlee Simpson rocks and autobiography was a hot album and a nice track...
"I have a stain on my t-shirt and I AM the biggest flirt if you want my autobiography...... please just ask me......... I'm a nasty girl in a fk up world....... oh nasty girl you want to get with me?.......... you want a piece of me?....................ahhhhhhhhhhh."
that song is so hot.
"I have a stain on my t-shirt and I AM the biggest flirt if you want my autobiography...... please just ask me......... I'm a nasty girl in a fk up world....... oh nasty girl you want to get with me?.......... you want a piece of me?....................ahhhhhhhhhhh."
that song is so hot.
qweretyuiopas
Master Don Juan
OMG this thread is so funny :crackup:Vulpine said:
Bad_Lil'Pixie
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2005
- Messages
- 253
- Reaction score
- 5
Nastiest thing I've done.....
....slid into second base wearing shorts.
....slid into second base wearing shorts.
pooparu
Senior Don Juan
LMAO, nah bro its cool i'll take your word for it.Vulpine said:
And bad, I didn't get that one till I realized you were a girl. Ouch. lol (I had to laugh).
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.