Swallowing the Hard Truth: Most Women Want the Top 10–20% of Men

[BadBoy89]

Stop using AI to write your posts.

If you can't come up with your own words on an anonymous forum, you're going to get clobbered in a real conversation with a real person.

Who said I’m using AI?

If you don’t stop assuming on an anonymous forum, you’re going to get clobbered in a real conversation with a real person.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

Who said I’m using AI?

I said you're using AI.

And at least show a little creativity when copying my sarcastic reply.

Making assumptions on an internet forum don't naturally lead to being socially incompetent, while using AI to compile your posts actually does.

 

[taiyuu_otoko]

I said you're using AI.

Now, this entire post being AI was just a hunch. But it's been validated as AI.

 

[BadBoy89]

I said you're using AI.

You are wrong.

And at least show a little creativity when copying my sarcastic reply.

You made an assumption, I corrected that assumption.

Making assumptions on an internet forum don't naturally lead to being socially incompetent, while using AI to compile your posts actually does.

Another assumption to fit an agenda.

Assuming like this on an Internet forum, real life would destroy a man in 2 seconds.

 

[BadBoy89]

Now, this entire post being AI was just a hunch. But it's been validated as AI.

If you actually READ the posit instead of assuming to fit an agenda, you would see the posit was taken from a website and the link to the website was posted in the 2nd line of the post.

Good assumption though. Our leaders have taught us well.

 

[The Diver]

. You can still be an average Joe and do well with women.

Water seeks its own level. You don't have to be in the top 10%, but naturally, You'll get what you put out.

 

[zekko]

Most men want the top 10-20% too, so what?

I think the issue is that women are less likely to compromise, while simultaneously overestimating their own value.

And if they do compromise, PUA gurus will shame the guys and tell them the women don't really desire them because they aren't their first choice. To which I ask, really, who of us gets their first choice? I look back, and I am thankful that I didn't get my first choice, because I'm sure it would not been a very pleasant existence.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I think the issue is that women are less likely to compromise, while simultaneously overestimating their own value.

And if they do compromise, PUA gurus will shame the guys and tell them the women don't really desire them because they aren't their first choice. To which I ask, really, who of us gets their first choice? I look back, and I am thankful that I didn't get my first choice, because I'm sure it would not been a very pleasant existence.

I don't think it's necessarily overestimating their own value, I think a lot has to do with them thinking, or maybe hoping even?, that the same higher SMV man who will treat them as a fvck toy and is only interested in banging them without any commitment will be the same guy they can get for an LTR.

Whether it's delusion or just them holding onto the hope of that dream for longer than is warranted based on reality, it doesn't really matter because the end result is the same...they keep getting pumped and dumped by the guys they want but never actually can get one of them to commit long term. Then eventually they realize it's not going to happen, so they "settle" for something lower who will give them what they want.

Some might be perfectly happy with this...but many are happy for a while or at least they logically try to talk themselves into it but after 5-7 years they can no longer overlook their feelings that they settled and that this isn't the man they actually want. Which is why so many divorced happen after 5-10 years, most initiated by women.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Now, this entire post being AI was just a hunch. But it's been validated as AI.

View attachment 15926

There is no such thing as using AI to determine if something is AI. That's been proven through many studies to be nonsense. To the point many companies have taken theirs down because when places use them to make decisions about things that could cause reputational or financial harm they open themselves up to major liabilities and lawsuits.

 

[zekko]

I don't think it's necessarily overestimating their own value, I think a lot has to do with them thinking, or maybe hoping even?, that the same higher SMV man who will treat them as a fvck toy and is only interested in banging them without any commitment will be the same guy they can get for an LTR.

That sounds a lot like overestimating their own value to me. A high value man doesn't see them as any more than a casual fling, and they translate that into thinking they can get such a guy for more.

 

[Mertz09]

“The day I stopped given a F women somehow smelled it.” This is so true. And they will come looking for the Man who is detached from what she wants.

 

[Mertz09]

“The day I stopped given a F women somehow smelled it.” This is so true. And they will come looking for the Man who is detached from what she wants.

I learned this years ago when I was in my 20s after a breakup with a young lady that I really fell for. After a fairly short time, I just didn’t give a.F. And from then on, I really didn’t have to work that hard at getting women.

 

[quodlibet]

AI or not, you're just overposting in general. You probably lack self-awareness to know how said this is.

 

[Cheeky_James]

Water seeks its own level. You don't have to be in the top 10%, but naturally, You'll get what you put out.

what does that saying actually mean?
I could google it .. but that’s anti social.
Can you explain pls

 

[Cheeky_James]

I don't think it's necessarily overestimating their own value, I think a lot has to do with them thinking, or maybe hoping even?, that the same higher SMV man who will treat them as a fvck toy and is only interested in banging them without any commitment will be the same guy they can get for an LTR.

Whether it's delusion or just them holding onto the hope of that dream for longer than is warranted based on reality, it doesn't really matter because the end result is the same...they keep getting pumped and dumped by the guys they want but never actually can get one of them to commit long term. Then eventually they realize it's not going to happen, so they "settle" for something lower who will give them what they want.

Some might be perfectly happy with this...but many are happy for a while or at least they logically try to talk themselves into it but after 5-7 years they can no longer overlook their feelings that they settled and that this isn't the man they actually want. Which is why so many divorced happen after 5-10 years, most initiated by women.

Very good summary.
I wonder for the average sexy 7 chick.
How many Chad guys they will go through before the pump n dump gets old and they start slowing down ..

What’d be your estimate of body count before that happens ..?

Ive tried to probe a few women but it’s hard to get an honest number tbh.
One I knew, circa 40 ish at 30yo. But she’s prob be quite low these days.

but get this - i had a date last week with a hot MILF, who had a 30 yo baddie friend .
Tall long legged brunette .
I got a quick glimpse of her IG pics and they were super hot bikini pics n sh1t. She’d be an 8 at least.

and got into a body count discussion w the Milf ..
She told me her friend estimates she’s been w 1,000 guys.

…….

My jaw hit the floor and I near fell off my chair

 

[The Diver]

what does that saying actually mean?
I could google it .. but that’s anti social.
Can you explain pls

In my world, that means you'll attract the opposite sex who is on your level.
Looks is great to have for fun time, but in my experience, when woman looking for a LTR, she'll look at the whole package.
You don't need to be Chad to attract a good, decent-looking woman.
Most men are lazy, and if you put in the hard work to better yourself in any area that is in your control ( financial, physical and social), you're already ahead of 80% of men.

 

[Cheeky_James]

In my world, that means you'll attract the opposite sex who is on your level.
Looks is great to have for fun time, but in my experience, when woman looking for a LTR, she'll look at the whole package.
You don't need to be Chad to attract a good, decent-looking woman.
Most men are lazy, and if you put in the hard work to better yourself in any area that is in your control ( financial, physical and social), you're already ahead of 80% of men.

well yes I agree.
My similar favorite saying is “Like Attracts Like”.
Which is pretty much a law of nature or as close to a scientific fact as it gets (in this space).
there is leagues to everything in life in reality etc
I don’t agree with your % tho.
No way … as it’s the most common dating strategy actually.

edit : that’s quite a funny concept that runs on these boards - that there is 80(!) % of men out there NOT running self improvement game.

this SS board is quite small - maybe tops 20 members active on any given day and 2000 guests. And somehow they think that the 99% of other men not on a forum are NOT self improving somehow . lol.
Pretty delusional imo. Sorry.

When the reality is only a tiny % of the population of men , who use pickup forums , that are NOT self improving, yet.

that may be a ln exaggeration on my part re the small % (to just illustrate a point). But whatever that % is = introvert nerds types.

So whatever % of the population of men that comprises of, and a subset of those to what % has not yet twigged self improvement as a mating strategy. So I’m probably not far off. Very small %z

Which would correlate, most probably as high likelyhood of that small % being majority NeuroDivergent types of dudes. That’s my step by step analysis.

so your statement is a fallacy basically. Perpetuated on forums.

 

[The Diver]

well yes I agree.
My similar favorite saying is “Like Attracts Like”.
Which is pretty much a law of nature or as close to a scientific fact as it gets (in this space).
there is leagues to everything in life in reality etc
I don’t agree with your % tho.
No way … as it’s the most common dating strategy actually.

edit : that’s quite a funny concept that runs on these boards - that there is 80(!) % of men out there NOT running self improvement game.

this SS board is quite small - maybe tops 20 members active on any given day and 2000 guests. And somehow they think that the 99% of other men not on a forum are NOT self improving somehow . lol.
Pretty delusional imo. Sorry.

When the reality is only a tiny % of the population of men , who use pickup forums , that are NOT self improving, yet.

that may be a ln exaggeration on my part re the small % (to just illustrate a point). But whatever that % is = introvert nerds types.

So whatever % of the population of men that comprises of, and a subset of those to what % has not yet twigged self improvement as a mating strategy. So I’m probably not far off. Very small %z

Which would correlate, most probably as high likelyhood of that small % being majority NeuroDivergent types of dudes. That’s my step by step analysis.

so your statement is a fallacy basically. Perpetuated on forums.

The only side that's apparent from the get-go without knowing the person, but say a lot about said person, is their physical appearance: fitness looks, grooming, clothing, body language, (the way you present yourself to your sorounding/world saying a lot about yourself; that indicates discipline, dedication, hard work, self-respect, self-esteem), and from my real-life observation of my surroundings, where it's shopping centres, dance studios, streets, coffee shops, restaurants and as such, the vast majority of men in that respect are average and below.
Putting in an effort in those areas I mentioned above already puts you ahead of the vast majority of men. Now add to that the hard work to better yourself overall, as I mentioned in my previous post, and yes, you're ahead of 80% of men.

I think your observations that everyone is doing the same to better themselves, " so there's no point in doing it as well just to be at the same place" is wrong, and kind of an excuse you're telling yourself not to do it.
As I said before, and I stand behind it, the vast majority of men are lazy and not doing everything they can to better themselves.

 

[SickSadWorld]

Let’s stop pretending the dating world is fair. It’s not. And it probably never was.

https://medium.com/@mybluheaven/swallowing-the-hard-truth-most-women-want-the-top-10-20-of-men-20e4e656e0a8

In today’s age of “equality,” you’d think things would be more balanced — more fair. But when it comes to attraction, nature still has a heavy hand in the game. And nature doesn’t care about fairness. Here’s the truth a lot of men don’t want to hear: most women are drawn to the top 10–20% of men. It’s not necessarily something they’re doing consciously — it’s how desire works. It’s how attraction plays out when people have options. And thanks to dating apps and global connectivity, women have more options than ever. So they’re shooting for the best — and often ignoring the rest.

Back in the day, it was kings, emperors, and warlords who had access to all the women. Not because they were always the most moral or kind, but because they had power, status, presence. Fast forward to now, and while crowns have been replaced by Instagram followers and luxury cars, the dynamic is eerily familiar.

Today, it’s height, looks, confidence (or “swag”), and often money that define who gets attention. These are the new social currencies. And whether you like it or not, most women are biologically wired to be drawn to strength, success, and security. You can say it’s shallow, but it’s human nature. And you can’t shame people out of their instincts.

Does that mean the average man is doomed? No. But it does mean you’re playing a rigged game if you expect affection just for being decent. In a marketplace where women can match with elite men daily, “kind and consistent” doesn’t always cut it unless it’s packaged with confidence, presence, and status. So what can you do?

Stop being bitter — and start being real. No, not every man is going to be in that top tier. And that’s okay. Because the truth is: not every man needs to be. What does matter is learning how to play your own game well. Maybe you won’t be 6’3”, rich, or a model — but you can build confidence. You can develop skills, learn to carry yourself with presence, create value, and become someone who respects himself enough to stop chasing people who don’t see him.

The red pill isn’t bitter because it’s wrong. It’s bitter because it’s real. But once you stop resisting it, once you accept that modern dating is built on primal dynamics dressed up in modern clothes — you can stop being angry and start being strategic. And more importantly, you can start finding peace. You’re not entitled to love, but you are entitled to your dignity. Stop crying over a system that doesn’t care, and start asking yourself: how do I win my way? Because kings still exist. They just don’t always wear crowns.

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Thoughts?

Of course. In the same way you, me and most men want the 10 % women too. The hottest of the hottest. Women too.

bro stop writing a million word for theories that don’t make sense

Today, it’s height, looks,

I can assure you it is not about that

 

[Cheeky_James]

Of course. In the same way you, me and most men want the 10 % women too. The hottest of the hottest. Women too.

bro stop writing a million word for theories that don’t make sense


I can assure you it is not about that

can you assure me too?
And obvs me link me to all the evidence please cheers thanks CJ