After asking for her number, how do you write it down?

[ivlvs_veridivs]

Sometimes, but I've gotten plenty of compliments from women I approached because I asked for their number when they were tired of guys being pus**es and asking for a Snapchat. At some point, the girl and I would probably follow each other on Instagram, and my exes especially all loved Snapchat with the streak feature.



Agreed, and most guys wouldn't know what to look for to know when that's possible, so it's unlikely much of this forum would benefit from that advice - but I think it's worth noting because it happens often enough that it might help somebody see that opportunity.

I had that happen just this last weekend with a girl I met at Seacrets during our bachelor party weekend. I approached her, she stopped, her friends left her with me, so I took her to the bar, we had some drinks, ended up making out, and I very directly invited her to come back with me, to which she agreed. The only reason that didn't result in a new LR is that one of the friends in the group had their boyfriend call her and admit to cheating and that he was breaking up with her, so that friend went into hysterics and needed her friends to comfort her - my girl included. She tried to satisfy both parties for a while, but eventually she apologized and said she had to leave with her. Considered writing a FR about it, but I don't know what lesson it teaches...maybe that you can do everything right and still fail?

Anyway, TL;DR it happens enough that guys shouldn't stop at the phone number if things are going well enough.

Question. How do you suggest going back to your place when you have just met her or a first date, without looking that you are just another dude looking to get laid. I guess in the end it is what it is, but I feel like “uncomfortable” asking them to go back to my place so soon. Like I don’t want them to think that I only see them as bags of meat. Which of course, says more about my prejudices than anything else…

 

[BPH]

Question. How do you suggest going back to your place when you have just met her or a first date, without looking that you are just another dude looking to get laid. I guess in the end it is what it is, but I feel like “uncomfortable” asking them to go back to my place so soon. Like I don’t want them to think that I only see them as bags of meat. Which of course, says more about my prejudices than anything else…

Everything you said after the bolded bit is your own bias, as you noted at the very end there.

It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal.

Lemme preface my advice by stating that a significant number of my lays were women I met out at a bar or club, or women I was out on a date with (usually from the bar, club, or a dating app). Point being, in most situations, it is late at night, on a weekend, and alcohol is involved, making it a much more natural segue.

Sometimes it'll just flow naturally. The chemistry's there, so I'll go for a kiss; she'll be receptive, so I'll ask her if she's ready to leave and wants to come to mine/go to hers.

Sometimes it requires some plausible deniability. Like when I was watching over my buddy's place in Philly, I suggested she come over to "meet the pets", on account of the cat, dog, and 2 ferrets.

And other times you just have to facilitate the logistics because she might not be a fan of PDA (public displays of affection). The girl I met at Seacrets this past weekend was like that, remarking that she isn't a huge fan of kissing in public, to which I suggested we go somewhere more private and invited her back to mine. Unfortunately, that didn't go as planned, but you can read about that in an earlier reply I left in this thread.

My advice would be to simply not make it a big deal. If you don't ask, the answer is always "no". Never explicitly state that you're inviting her/going to hers for sex. And keep moving things along unless you're stopped.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Everything you said after the bolded bit is your own bias, as you noted at the very end there.

It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal.

Lemme preface my advice by stating that a significant number of my lays were women I met out at a bar or club, or women I was out on a date with (usually from the bar, club, or a dating app). Point being, in most situations, it is late at night, on a weekend, and alcohol is involved, making it a much more natural segue.

Sometimes it'll just flow naturally. The chemistry's there, so I'll go for a kiss; she'll be receptive, so I'll ask her if she's ready to leave and wants to come to mine/go to hers.

Sometimes it requires some plausible deniability. Like when I was watching over my buddy's place in Philly, I suggested she come over to "meet the pets", on account of the cat, dog, and 2 ferrets.

And other times you just have to facilitate the logistics because she might not be a fan of PDA (public displays of affection). The girl I met at Seacrets this past weekend was like that, remarking that she isn't a huge fan of kissing in public, to which I suggested we go somewhere more private and invited her back to mine. Unfortunately, that didn't go as planned, but you can read about that in an earlier reply I left in this thread.

My advice would be to simply not make it a big deal. If you don't ask, the answer is always "no". Never explicitly state that you're inviting her/going to hers for sex. And keep moving things along unless you're stopped.

The funniest thing is when the women invites you over and then prefaces it by saying "just so you know, we aren't having sex".

That's when I smile to myself and say "of course not, you need to wine and dine me first", but I'm reality I know that when we get there we are DEFINITELY having sex

 

[ivlvs_veridivs]

Everything you said after the bolded bit is your own bias, as you noted at the very end there.

It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal.

Lemme preface my advice by stating that a significant number of my lays were women I met out at a bar or club, or women I was out on a date with (usually from the bar, club, or a dating app). Point being, in most situations, it is late at night, on a weekend, and alcohol is involved, making it a much more natural segue.

Sometimes it'll just flow naturally. The chemistry's there, so I'll go for a kiss; she'll be receptive, so I'll ask her if she's ready to leave and wants to come to mine/go to hers.

Sometimes it requires some plausible deniability. Like when I was watching over my buddy's place in Philly, I suggested she come over to "meet the pets", on account of the cat, dog, and 2 ferrets.

And other times you just have to facilitate the logistics because she might not be a fan of PDA (public displays of affection). The girl I met at Seacrets this past weekend was like that, remarking that she isn't a huge fan of kissing in public, to which I suggested we go somewhere more private and invited her back to mine. Unfortunately, that didn't go as planned, but you can read about that in an earlier reply I left in this thread.

My advice would be to simply not make it a big deal. If you don't ask, the answer is always "no". Never explicitly state that you're inviting her/going to hers for sex. And keep moving things along unless you're stopped.

Thanks, I will try more often just asking with “hey, want to go back to my place?” And insert some random excuse there. Life’s too short to not risk it all.

The last time what I did was that I said to the girl “Hey, I got A/C at my place, do you want to come with me?”. We were at her place and the A/C wasn’t working, and it was really ****ing hot. She agreed, we kissed, and she turned on but in the end she was really nervous to close the deal, I believe she was on her period. I didn’t see her again, because interest kind of faded from my side. Now all my stories on IG receive a like from her.

 

[BPH]

Thanks, I will try more often just asking with “hey, want to go back to my place?” And insert some random excuse there.

As with my advice for getting the number, my suggestion is to TELL, not ASK.

"Hey let's go to my place" vs "Hey want to go to my place?"

The difference is small, but in one situation you're leading, in the other you're asking for permission. "No" is the same in both scenarios, but one requires her to stop, think, and say "yes", as opposed to just following you.

 

[ivlvs_veridivs]

As with my advice for getting the number, my suggestion is to TELL, not ASK.

"Hey let's go to my place" vs "Hey want to go to my place?"

The difference is small, but in one situation you're leading, in the other you're asking for permission. "No" is the same in both scenarios, but one requires her to stop, think, and say "yes", as opposed to just following you.

Mmmm, never thought about it that way, but it makes sense. Thank you!

 

[We_ArE_VeNOM]

if u give a girl ur number or business card (lol) by default she has to send the first message silly.

Sir, the interaction doesn't begin with her messaging (or calling) you.

The interaction begins when you approach her.

1. You approach her and communicate with her that she should take your number and reach out to you.

2. If she takes your number, she responds by doing WTF you told her to do...by reaching out to you.

You told her what to do, and she did it.. because she found you interesting enough to so..when, she just as easily could have not done it.

it creates unnecessary friction if you simply refuse to a ask any girl for their number.

What friction?

You guys keep making these blank assertions, without any explanation whatsoever.

I can give at least 3 reasons as to why it is more beneficial for a man to give a woman his number, rather than vice versa.

My methodology ain't just some blank ass theory...there is actual rationale behind it.

Not to mention supported by my own personal testimony.

if a girl asks for my number, ofc i’ll give it her. if i want to just get her number so i can still go get more numbers, ill ask for her number, say ill text u and continue on w my night. in my experience it doesn’t matter. both lead to lays and no lays.

You can give her your number, and still "go give more numbers" as well.

That is a distinction without much of a difference.