Article below.
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Men are happier and healthier than women in marriage (according to research)
Some pretty convincing evidence validates the claim that men draw the long end of the stick in marriage compared to women.
The research shows that marriage is more beneficial to men in terms of health, emotional support, household labor, less stress, financial stability, and society’s expectations.
Marriage seems to come with more perks for men than women. This includes men even living longer and dealing with fewer health issues because their wives are constantly nudging them toward healthier habits.
But for women, it’s different. They already tend to take better care of themselves, married or not, so they’re not seeing the same health boost from marriage.
Then there’s the emotional side. Men mostly rely on their wives for emotional support rather than other men or family members. But, women usually already have more social connections outside of marriage. So, they don’t see any extra benefit there. Many women may not even get any emotional support from their husbands.
And let’s talk about stress. In many marriages, women handle most (if not all) of the housework and childcare, even if they work full-time. It’s like marriage just adds more to their plate.
What about financially? Married men tend to earn more, while women who step away from work to raise children and take care of the family take hits to their income and career progress.
So, all things considered…maybe marriage isn’t quite the same winning ticket for women as it is for men. And after looking through the research, I have to say that a lot of it makes sense.
But what kind of marriage is this anyway?
I do have to admit though that it probably depends on what type of marriage you’re in. I think the idea of men getting more out of marriage than women would mostly apply to truly traditional marriages, in my opinion.
By traditional marriage, I mean those where a man and a woman each have a “place” in the family structure. You know what I’m talking about— the “old fashioned” type of marriage from the “old days” (as I’ve heard it referred to recently).
A woman’s “place” was not to be questioned
Back in the day, it was like women were just expected to be everything for a man — cook, maid, sex object, nurse, therapist, personal assistant, and pretty much a doormat.
In those old-school marriages, gender roles were super strict, and women were often told to put their dreams on hold for the family. They were trained to serve, always putting their husbands’ needs first while trying to keep up with housework, raising the kids, and holding it all together emotionally and hardly getting anything in return.
Women would often wear a smile in public while they may have felt like dying on the inside. They often pretended everything was perfect, even when it wasn’t. No matter how much was weighing on them, society expected them to sweep any mess under the rug, keep up appearances, and keep home struggles a secret.
My mom swept a lot of crap under the rug. My dad was one of those lazy husbands. He seldom cooked a meal for the family or did any housework. He was very needy emotionally and he put my mom through a lot of pain.
Growing up, I remember so much tension in our household because of him. He was an alcoholic, a heavy smoker, and a cheater who kept losing his job. He had other women throughout their 35-year marriage.
Yes. They were married for 35 years until he died. And my mom did it all.
He even admitted out loud that he didn’t deserve her. She was a traditional wife for sure and my dad got more benefits from the marriage than she ever did.
That’s just one example, but I recall that’s pretty much the only type of marriage I ever saw. My friend’s dads were living their best lives benefitting off their wives too. I saw it in my aunt’s and uncle’s marriages. It’s what we saw on TV. It’s what I grew up thinking marriage was all about. My marriage was like that. My first husband was lazy and I carried all the weight and my second one was abusive, so the same **** but on steroids.
Marriages in today’s times
Times have changed and paradigm shifts are happening when it comes to marriage. People seem more open now. I’m sure some people prefer traditional marriages but I’m seeing that stereotype much less.
We can look around and see more men pushing baby strollers or doing the grocery shopping. On social media, we see men posting how they’re cooking for the family and doing the housework. We even see more TV shows where men are supportive and nurturing in marriage.
I’m pleased to see my nieces with good husbands who share the load. And, while my daughter isn’t married yet, she is determined not to settle for anything less in a marriage than what she will bring to it.
And what about gender roles? Society has learned to accept that couples are embracing diverse gender identities, not just the usual male and female labels.
I’ve concluded that whether one person gets the most out of the marriage than the other depends on what someone will or will not allow. Expectations should be dealt with before people get married. It’s about mutual respect and not allowing society or anybody else’s opinions to dictate what goes on in the marriage.
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Thoughts?
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Men are happier and healthier than women in marriage (according to research)
Some pretty convincing evidence validates the claim that men draw the long end of the stick in marriage compared to women.
The research shows that marriage is more beneficial to men in terms of health, emotional support, household labor, less stress, financial stability, and society’s expectations.
Marriage seems to come with more perks for men than women. This includes men even living longer and dealing with fewer health issues because their wives are constantly nudging them toward healthier habits.
But for women, it’s different. They already tend to take better care of themselves, married or not, so they’re not seeing the same health boost from marriage.
Then there’s the emotional side. Men mostly rely on their wives for emotional support rather than other men or family members. But, women usually already have more social connections outside of marriage. So, they don’t see any extra benefit there. Many women may not even get any emotional support from their husbands.
And let’s talk about stress. In many marriages, women handle most (if not all) of the housework and childcare, even if they work full-time. It’s like marriage just adds more to their plate.
What about financially? Married men tend to earn more, while women who step away from work to raise children and take care of the family take hits to their income and career progress.
So, all things considered…maybe marriage isn’t quite the same winning ticket for women as it is for men. And after looking through the research, I have to say that a lot of it makes sense.
But what kind of marriage is this anyway?
I do have to admit though that it probably depends on what type of marriage you’re in. I think the idea of men getting more out of marriage than women would mostly apply to truly traditional marriages, in my opinion.
By traditional marriage, I mean those where a man and a woman each have a “place” in the family structure. You know what I’m talking about— the “old fashioned” type of marriage from the “old days” (as I’ve heard it referred to recently).
A woman’s “place” was not to be questioned
Back in the day, it was like women were just expected to be everything for a man — cook, maid, sex object, nurse, therapist, personal assistant, and pretty much a doormat.
In those old-school marriages, gender roles were super strict, and women were often told to put their dreams on hold for the family. They were trained to serve, always putting their husbands’ needs first while trying to keep up with housework, raising the kids, and holding it all together emotionally and hardly getting anything in return.
Women would often wear a smile in public while they may have felt like dying on the inside. They often pretended everything was perfect, even when it wasn’t. No matter how much was weighing on them, society expected them to sweep any mess under the rug, keep up appearances, and keep home struggles a secret.
My mom swept a lot of crap under the rug. My dad was one of those lazy husbands. He seldom cooked a meal for the family or did any housework. He was very needy emotionally and he put my mom through a lot of pain.
Growing up, I remember so much tension in our household because of him. He was an alcoholic, a heavy smoker, and a cheater who kept losing his job. He had other women throughout their 35-year marriage.
Yes. They were married for 35 years until he died. And my mom did it all.
He even admitted out loud that he didn’t deserve her. She was a traditional wife for sure and my dad got more benefits from the marriage than she ever did.
That’s just one example, but I recall that’s pretty much the only type of marriage I ever saw. My friend’s dads were living their best lives benefitting off their wives too. I saw it in my aunt’s and uncle’s marriages. It’s what we saw on TV. It’s what I grew up thinking marriage was all about. My marriage was like that. My first husband was lazy and I carried all the weight and my second one was abusive, so the same **** but on steroids.
Marriages in today’s times
Times have changed and paradigm shifts are happening when it comes to marriage. People seem more open now. I’m sure some people prefer traditional marriages but I’m seeing that stereotype much less.
We can look around and see more men pushing baby strollers or doing the grocery shopping. On social media, we see men posting how they’re cooking for the family and doing the housework. We even see more TV shows where men are supportive and nurturing in marriage.
I’m pleased to see my nieces with good husbands who share the load. And, while my daughter isn’t married yet, she is determined not to settle for anything less in a marriage than what she will bring to it.
And what about gender roles? Society has learned to accept that couples are embracing diverse gender identities, not just the usual male and female labels.
I’ve concluded that whether one person gets the most out of the marriage than the other depends on what someone will or will not allow. Expectations should be dealt with before people get married. It’s about mutual respect and not allowing society or anybody else’s opinions to dictate what goes on in the marriage.
-------------
Thoughts?