Why would anyone join Tinder just to make friends?

[GoodMan32]

I got my first match on Tinder...yet after checking out her profile, it says she's only on Tinder to make new friends.

Using an app for dating or sex makes sense. It's been said on the forum before that once you reach a certain age, your day-to-day routine isn't exactly conducive to finding a partner.

Using an app just to make friends, on the other hand, isn't that the epitome of desperate? You might as well be holding a sign that says "I'm such a pariah, no one I meet organically wants to be my friend"

 

[Clockwerk50]

You take things too literal.

 

[GoodMan32]

You take things too literal.

Tinder has a number of options you can pick from (as far as what you're looking for).

The options include:

-long term relationship
-short term fun
-long term (but open to short)
-short term (but open to long)
-still figuring it out
-new friends

I don't think I'm taking it too literally. With the multitude of dating/sex-related options to pick from, there's no reason to select the "new friends" option unless you really are only looking for friends.

 

[zekko]

I don't know the first thing about OLD, but I've always heard that women use the "looking for friends" bit to make it look like they aren't 403ing it up.

 

[SW15]

You take things too literal.

That's correct.

There's zero chance that a woman is on Tinder seeking new friends. She is seeking new friends with sexual benefits. She's conveniently omitting that part. She isn't picking "short term fun" based on Anti-Slut Defense, as @zekko mentions. They do this on the off chance that someone they know in real life sees them on there.

If a woman is actually looking for friends, she knows she can use the Bumble BFF app (launched in 2016, well known) or attend Meetup.com events. There are other things that a woman can do in the real world to find friends.

 

[GoodMan32]

That's correct.

There's zero chance that a woman is on Tinder seeking new friends. She is seeking new friends with sexual benefits. She's conveniently omitting that part. She isn't picking "short term fun" based on Anti-Slut Defense, as @zekko mentions. They do this on the off chance that someone they know in real life sees them on there.

If a woman is actually looking for friends, she knows she can use the Bumble BFF app (launched in 2016, well known) or attend Meetup.com events. There are other things that woman can do in the real world to find friends.

Hmm, in that case, perhaps I should message the woman I matched with on Tinder who put "new friends" as her selection of what she's looking for.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Tinder has a number of options you can pick from (as far as what you're looking for).

The options include:

-long term relationship
-short term fun
-long term (but open to short)
-short term (but open to long)
-still figuring it out
-new friends

I don't think I'm taking it too literally. With the multitude of dating/sex-related options to pick from, there's no reason to select the "new friends" option unless you really are only looking for friends.

It’s either plausible deniability or the way she wants her romantic movie to begin. You’re just too dense to see it.

 

[GoodMan32]

It’s either plausible deniability or the way she wants her romantic movie to begin. You’re just too dense to see it.

@SW15's post got me to see the light.

I went ahead and messaged the Tinder woman whose profile says she's only looking for friends (and she replied back)

I've also been chatting back and forth with a fattie (my own age )

This is my first time using Tinder (and I haven't been tremendously active on apps period this past decade). It's inevitable I'd be unfamiliar with certain stuff.

 

[Clockwerk50]

@SW15's post got me to see the light.

I went ahead and messaged the Tinder woman whose profile says she's only looking for friends (and she replied back)

I've also been chatting back and forth with a fattie (my own age )

This is my first time using Tinder (and I haven't been tremendously active on apps period this past decade). It's inevitable I'd be unfamiliar with certain stuff.

1. It is not only Tinder. Men communicate overtly; women communicate covertly. I’ve said this many times to you. If you happen to go out with a woman after hours and she invites you to her house, then tells you, “Don’t think we’re going to have sex,” it usually means she’s actually considering it, but she wants you to lead the situation without being presumptuous. You need to stop thinking so literally. Seduction is about reading signs, the ability to send and receive them through clothing, gestures, and actions.

2. There’s a Spanish saying that loosely translates to, “The devil knows more from experience than because he’s the devil,” or more simply, “There’s no substitute for experience.” The advice and judgment you get here comes from knowledge gained by men who have conquered many women, we’re telling you what actually works. The truth is, 99% of the advice you get here works, but you don’t apply it. You need to actually follow the advice if you want to be successful.

 

[BaronOfHair]

...it says she's only on Tinder to make new friends

We live in an era where words("safety" and "trauma" being but two egregious examples)are continously being redefined, ergo I urge you to exercise caution here, hoss... By "friend", this chick may REALLY mean: "Someone to play Aoyama to my Asami"

 

[CornbreadFed]

Aka she sees you as low smv

 

[corrector]

Let us know if your "friend" goes anywhere beyond online chatter. That is still a good result after just going on Tinder. It's better than nothing which was the default expectation. How old is she?

In terms of the answer to the first post of your thread....women are different than guys. They tend to be more ASD/screening on their profile, especially someone who looks like her. It best to be yourself and if you are not too overinvested (ie she doesn't sound too hot based on how you describe her), then she might be making the moves on you.

 

[GoodMan32]

Let us know if your "friend" goes anywhere beyond online chatter. That is still a good result after just going on Tinder. It's better than nothing which was the default expectation. How old is she?

I don't recall the exact age (but close to me)

 

[SW15]

Men communicate overtly; women communicate covertly. I’ve said this many times to you. If you happen to go out with a woman after hours and she invites you to her house, then tells you, “Don’t think we’re going to have sex,” it usually means she’s actually considering it, but she wants you to lead the situation without being presumptuous. You need to stop thinking so literally. Seduction is about reading signs, the ability to send and receive them through clothing, gestures, and actions.

The majority of men have difficulty reading female covert signs. Plenty of neurotypical men have misread female covert communication and had an unpleasant experience as a result.

The combination of real experience and absorbing good seduction content helps with handling these situations.

The advice and judgment you get here comes from knowledge gained by men who have conquered many women, we’re telling you what actually works. The truth is, 99% of the advice you get here works, but you don’t apply it. You need to actually follow the advice if you want to be successful.

He's received good advice on this forum.

Back in the early 2000s, when I was first getting into seduction, I was reading various content creators. Some would have been called PUAs. Although forums existed back then, I was not reading one.

Following good advice is crucial.

 

[Divorced w 3]

I got my first match on Tinder...yet after checking out her profile, it says she's only on Tinder to make new friends.

Using an app for dating or sex makes sense. It's been said on the forum before that once you reach a certain age, your day-to-day routine isn't exactly conducive to finding a partner.

Using an app just to make friends, on the other hand, isn't that the epitome of desperate? You might as well be holding a sign that says "I'm such a pariah, no one I meet organically wants to be my friend"

There is only one reason that anyone is on the apps. Sexual connection. It may not be spontaneously driven, it may actually be relationship driven, but both paths lead to both parties being there for the same reason.

 

[GoodMan32]

He's received good advice on this forum.

Back in the early 2000s, when I was first getting into seduction, I was reading various content creators. Some would have been called PUAs. Although forums existed back then, I was not reading one.

Following good advice is crucial.

In real life, I tend to hit it off better with the opposite sex than with my own gender.

At work, for example, I mainly socialize with the opposite sex (both in my workplace as well as other workplaces in my office building). Same thing in my condo building (I talk to female neighbors/employees more than I talk to male neighbors/employees). So much for a claim that was made on a recent post (by our most active female poster) that I'm afraid of the opposite sex.

Yet, interestingly, my hitting it off with the opposite sex hasn't really translated into much luck in the dating/intercourse department.

You'd think a man who naturally gravitates toward the opposite sex would be a natural at getting cooch (and wouldn't even need to consult the internet)

 

[Mike32ct]

In real life, I tend to hit it off better with the opposite sex than with my own gender.

At work, for example, I mainly socialize with the opposite sex (both in my workplace as well as other workplaces in my office building). Same thing in my condo building (I talk to female neighbors/employees more than I talk to male neighbors/employees). So much for a claim that was made on a recent post (by our most active female poster) that I'm afraid of the opposite sex.

Yet, interestingly, my hitting it off with the opposite sex hasn't really translated into much luck in the dating/intercourse department.

You'd think a man who naturally gravitates toward the opposite sex would be a natural at getting cooch (and wouldn't even need to consult the internet)

It is possible to be good at connecting with and befriending women, but not necessarily be actively dating/sexing them.

There are some straight guys that “click” better with women than men socially.

 

[pipeman84]

1. It is not only Tinder. Men communicate overtly; women communicate covertly. I’ve said this many times to you. If you happen to go out with a woman after hours and she invites you to her house, then tells you, “Don’t think we’re going to have sex,” it usually means she’s actually considering it, but she wants you to lead the situation without being presumptuous. You need to stop thinking so literally. Seduction is about reading signs, the ability to send and receive them through clothing, gestures, and actions.

Actually I think that's BS used by hoes and the sort of #metoo crazies that cry rape the next day because they either didn't like the sex and/or to play the victim card. A self-respecting guy would simply decline that kind of invitation. And if she comes up with that line when arriving at the house, he'd just make an excuse and leave. That would be a lesson she'd never forget.

 

[Mike32ct]

Back on topic, she’s probably looking for FWB. And in the off chance the guy is really cool but not attractive (or attractive but so so in bed), she could possibly entertain the possibility of a guy friend.

But it’s primarily for FWB. Platonic friend is a hedge or worst case scenario.

 

[SW15]

There are some straight guys that “click” better with women than men socially.

I've never seen that happen. My friends are all men. I have some female acquaintances. I connect better on a friendship level with men.

she’s probably looking for FWB.

Yes, that's it. Multiple posters have said that. Tinder is a tough app. It's even tougher than Bumble or Hinge.