Anyone else here not being shown any affection or love?

[user252009]

I was just thinking this the other day, I am so rarely shown affection or love by anyone. Last time a woman told me she loved me was over 5 years ago and that was a long distance thing with a mentally unwell woman - before that, I think it was 10 or more years ago. Affection is only shown to me by girlfriends (last one was a year ago).

 

[kavi]

I've noticed that too. It seems to have gotten worse over time. Women definitely are too weird about showing affection to men outside of relationships because I think they feel the man should work for it and pay with commitment/relationship.

Women in our society are trying too hard to play this game of trading affection for commitment and relationships from men. Its really gotten bad these days and I am seeing women very awkward expressing openness, affection and love. It's also difficult to get hugs and things like that cos lots of loser guys have been trying to touch girls like that so it is just seen in that light.

People also dont understand that sex is really a form of love and hence the unnatural and ugly casual sex scene is causing the love and affection flow in our society to become broken.

All the problems are related to the 'game' of using affection to manipulate and control men.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Im not big on affection, unless its from a LTR

 

[user252009]

I not big on affection, unless its from a LTR

Uh..Affection and love are the core of intimacy with a woman, do you only have animalistic sex relationships with your women then or what?

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Uh..Affection and love are the core of intimacy with a woman, do you only have animalistic sex relationships with your women then or what?

Sorry bro. You lost me. Your reply sounds like if my original post was something like "I hate affection, even from LTRs". Dont mind me, English is not my native tongue.

 

[user252009]

Women don’t love you the way you love them.

We are programmed to love her. She is programmed to love children.

where it’s difficult for men is when you’re down. There are very few who care.

its why we earn more and why we kill ourselves more frequently

Truth, man

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Quit chasing club rats lol

 

[Barrister]

Well, affection generally is only shown to someone by either immediate family or a significant other. So I don't think your experience is necessarily some outlier. I think other than women I have been in a relationship with, the only other person in my life I have gotten true "affection" from is my mother. It is a fairly limited list for all of us.

 

[user252009]

Remember back in the day when women would try to use you for physical affection/cuddling with minimal sex? Now it's the opposite.

Damn, you’re absolutely right.

 

[corrector]

The women in the past who said "they loved me", in particular both ex-gf/ex-wife, ended up breaking-up/divorcing in circumstances which betray those very words. From that point, talk is cheap. If someone says you then betrays that down the road, then its sort of meaningless.
The real question is, has anybody said "they loved you" and meant it in the long-run?

 

[user252009]

The women in the past who said "they loved me", in particular both ex-gf/ex-wife, ended up breaking-up/divorcing in circumstances which betray those very words. From that point, talk is cheap. If someone says you then betrays that down the road, then its sort of meaningless.
The real question is, has anybody said "they loved you" and meant it in the long-run?

Mind sharing why they broke up with you? I think most men here know *how* women love, in comparison to us

 

[Smok1nAce]

simps have invaded with constant likes, and unwanted attention, most woman are turned of by affection now.

 

[user252009]

simps have invaded with constant likes, and unwanted attention, most woman are turned of by affection now.

most woman see men as weak.

It’s not about us giving them affection, it’s about how rarely the women want to give men affection.

 

[Smok1nAce]

It’s not about us giving them affection, it’s about how rarely the women want to give men affection.

Unofrtantly the best way to get affection from another woman is to be seen with another woman.

 

[corrector]

Mind sharing why they broke up with you? I think most men here know *how* women love, in comparison to us

Think I probably already mentioned that a zillion times, but here goes again.

The ex-gf break-up was because I called off the engagement and didn't show up to places where she'd be at or email or contact her. This is because of something that I couldn't handle or understand about her past (my mother and I spoke with her ex-husband and the pastor who married them together in a former chruch she was at - she put up a profile on a Christian site just while she was divorcing her ex-husband when I first saw her profile. Her ex-husband was pining away and hoping she would repent and come back with him and that put everyone into shock) and was adminant not to continue dealing with her. However, she's blamed anyway because she didn't reach out to me or send an email to see how I was doing and looked like she moved on too quickly, like "us" didn't mean that much to her anyway. That to me betrays if there was any real love there despite her claims that she love me and agreed to marry me.

The ex-wife was a break-down of the marriage, but mainly financial issues where we could not really live together because neither of us could afford rent, she didn't like my house, and her family was too toxic to live in hers. She also had a child in the picture and the ex-bf was in the picture with joint-custody of that child and she kept asking for divorce papers when she saw we didn't have money.

Both issues betray their words "I love you" as nonsense.

 

[EyeBRollin]

Women don’t love men so much as they love our utility and how we make them feel. It’s highly conditional and inward facing. They don’t really care about us like that. Only what we can do / provide for them.

 

[Barrister]

Women don’t love men so much as they love our utility and how we make them feel. It’s highly conditional and inward facing. They don’t really care about us like that. Only what we can do / provide for them.

Spot on. And unfortunately, what you have done isn't so important as what you can do in the future. No such thing as "good will." They are completely ruthless - but that is their nature.

 

[user252009]

Women don’t love men so much as they love our utility and how we make them feel. It’s highly conditional and inward facing. They don’t really care about us like that. Only what we can do / provide for them.

So we can assume that their expressions of affection are conditioned with our provisioning them with feels, experiences and goods

 

[Barrister]

So we can assume that their expressions of affection are conditioned with our provisioning them with feels, experiences and goods

The only unconditional love that exists is from a parent to a child. Definitely no such thing from a girlfriend/LTR/wife. Believing that there is is buying into the Disney fantasy.

 

[EyeBRollin]

So we can assume that their expressions of affection are conditioned with our provisioning them with feels, experiences and goods

Yes. Remove the feels, experience, and goods and watch what happens.