Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Finding the best city in terms of meeting women.

Jesse Pinkman

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This is another advice post and while @SW15 and I have done our fair share of city guides, I wanted this guide to be the blueprint for all of you in terms of picking your next city to move to. Here's the kicker, the answer will be different based on each and every one of you.

How guys do it wrong and how NOT to do it.

Most guys think "oh hot girls" or "whoa good gender ratios" and immediately make their choice based on that. As I have commented all too much, I have known a lot of guys from San Francisco who came to NYC in hopes of a better dating life because they heard the ratios were better. In almost all instances, their dating lives barely improved. In fact, these guys were even more miserable when they found that NYC had colder winters and people that were more blunt and rude. I've heard similar stories from guys who move from western European countries to EE but I am sure @Who Dares Win can comment more on this.

So in case you missed my point, never make women and date your sole reason for picking your next city.

Here is a good litmus test on how solid your choice is, can you list at least 3 things you like about a city other than the women and the dating scene? If you can, you have a legitimate choice. It could be the politics, the culture, the food, the music scene, and the unique aspects of that city itself. If you can list at least 3 of those things, you'll have a happy life. If it has at least 200k people, you have no excuse.

I know of one of my friends who struggled a lot with women in NYC even though he had opportunities. The issue is that he was not happy in the city, it wore him out. So where does he move? Seattle. Idiot right? Seattle. The city you do not move to for the women. Fast forward to a couple years later, he has dated a brunette that's a solid 8 and an Asian-white mix with almost model looks. Yes, the women in city are hideous compared to NYC but it's still a big f-ckin city.

How it all kind of works.

Here is how the thing overall works.

1. You subconsciously take women off the pedestal.

Think about it, you move to a city just for the women and the dating scene, you are putting women on the pedestal. You literally took your resources and physically made a big move solely to get laid. No matter how much research it was based on, you made the move for women alone. You put women on the pedestal and based your entire happiness of the move on how much you get laid. Now say you did it for 3 other reasons, you're likely to be happier since women are not a part of it.

2. Due to 1, you are likely to be happier.

You are likely to enjoy life regardless of how much success you are having with women. Some women are likely to pick up on this and actually like your vibe. This is likely to get them to give you a chance because you are not coming off as desperate.

3. You have a higher ceiling even outside of game.

You are likely to make friends, get invited to fancier events, and have a social circle because people love your energy. You might even discover some of your talents and for all we know, be that musician at a local bar. Who knows. Even if the city is supposedly bad for dating, it works out for you.

Don't go to a city for the women, don't even go to a country for that. Pick a place which has 3 things you are likely to love outside of dating.

My choice to go to Miami.

Men consider Miami to be a tough city for game. Yeah you have hot girls but you also have a lot of rich dudes throwing money around, poor gender ratios, dudes flooding in from everywhere after the pandemic, stuck up women, and a lot of guys in good shape with the beach body. Miami is one of the cities the world said not to go to for game. I went anyways because:

1. It is a very international city
2. I love Latin culture
3. Florida is amazing with De Santis as Governor and Miami is surprisingly quite Republican due to the Cuban population

You may disagree with me on all 3 points, I do not care but they were strong enough in Miami to get me to consider moving.

I know of guys who solely went for the hot girls, they didn't last. I have had a great time with Miami as a result and am afraid I might end up being here longer than I want. @Jake_Gyllenhaal69 had the exact opposite experience with Nashville.
 

BillyPilgrim

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A lot of times your look and vibe will have surprisingly varying results in different domestic cities. What you can do if you've never been to a place and don't have the ability to casually visit right away, is put up an OLD profile and compare it to the results in your current city. Don't spend too much time on it, just enough to get a solid idea of how you would be perceived. Much better than actually moving only to find out you're screwed in the dating department.

Obviously you still want to visit the city you end up moving to beforehand, but this is a good way to kind of narrow things down before you actually visit anyplace in-person.
 
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Black Widow Void

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The three things that sell a house are also the same three things that provide additional bedpost notches (location, location, location).

I consider myself to have lived a rather fortunate life, but place me in a rural location and I will normally sink - rather than swim. I'm not implying that my culture is better or worse than theirs, it's just different - like oil and water. This was the only time that I lowered my standards on a more continual basis.

This was back when I also did the on line thing. In order to find a female over 25 that at least had a bachelors degree and no children, I had to expand my search to 35 miles (and even then, it wasn't plentiful or very pretty).
 

SW15

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Most guys think "oh hot girls" or "whoa good gender ratios" and immediately make their choice based on that.
Yes, that's true. Another thing I'd add to that is that it is better if the guy fits the vibe of that city. You've talked about a lot of men moving to Miami and not having a good Miami vibe. I've seen situation where men from the Tri State area near NYC move to other parts of the USA and don't fit the vibe there. I think that's common since the Tri State area has a very distinct culture that isn't common in other parts of the USA.

never make women and date your sole reason for picking your next city.
The mating environment was one of multiple reasons behind my move to Dallas. If I had made the move solely based upon the mating environment, I would have been sorely disappointed. I detailed that in my Dallas thread.

Here is a good litmus test on how solid your choice is, can you list at least 3 things you like about a city other than the women and the dating scene? If you can, you have a legitimate choice. It could be the politics, the culture, the food, the music scene, and the unique aspects of that city itself. If you can list at least 3 of those things, you'll have a happy life. If it has at least 200k people, you have no excuse.

1. You subconsciously take women off the pedestal.

Think about it, you move to a city just for the women and the dating scene, you are putting women on the pedestal. You literally took your resources and physically made a big move solely to get laid. No matter how much research it was based on, you made the move for women alone. You put women on the pedestal and based your entire happiness of the move on how much you get laid. Now say you did it for 3 other reasons, you're likely to be happier since women are not a part of it.

2. Due to 1, you are likely to be happier.

You are likely to enjoy life regardless of how much success you are having with women. Some women are likely to pick up on this and actually like your vibe. This is likely to get them to give you a chance because you are not coming off as desperate.

3. You have a higher ceiling even outside of game.

You are likely to make friends, get invited to fancier events, and have a social circle because people love your energy. You might even discover some of your talents and for all we know, be that musician at a local bar. Who knows. Even if the city is supposedly bad for dating, it works out for you.

Don't go to a city for the women, don't even go to a country for that. Pick a place which has 3 things you are likely to love outside of dating.
I like the litmus test.

I think a lot of men who relocate within the United States consider other factors besides the mating environment in their move. Employment is usually the factor that ranks ahead of the mating environment.

There are Western men who expat to another nation for the vagina in that country.
 

Murk

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I live in London but have a place in Miramar (just north of Miami) that I'm in every year. I like Miami, because like OP Latinas are my weakness, but it's not home. I could never live in the U.S. you guys think it's the best country in the world because you haven't been anywhere else.
 

Jesse Pinkman

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I live in London but have a place in Miramar (just north of Miami) that I'm in every year. I like Miami, because like OP Latinas are my weakness, but it's not home. I could never live in the U.S. you guys think it's the best country in the world because you haven't been anywhere else.
I'll disagree here, IMO, the US is far superior to almost all countries in the world and I say this as someone who has been abroad. People hate on America because its the most important country in the western world and the world period but it's fact, we matter more than other countries do. Celebs have to come here to make a career and our culture is the most dominant on the planet. Even outside of the soft power, the US has so much variety to where each part of the country becomes its own country. I would not want to live in any other country on the planet, especially not in socialist dump western Europe.
 

Murk

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I'll disagree here, IMO, the US is far superior to almost all countries in the world and I say this as someone who has been abroad. People hate on America because its the most important country in the western world and the world period but it's fact, we matter more than other countries do. Celebs have to come here to make a career and our culture is the most dominant on the planet. Even outside of the soft power, the US has so much variety to where each part of the country becomes its own country. I would not want to live in any other country on the planet, especially not in socialist dump western Europe.
A whole bunch of waffle about celebrity, power and of course “the greatest country in the world” without backing up the claims. I think you should Google socialism/socialist countries, the great American education system at work again.

I speak as someone who lives, not visited, in America for years with regular visits lasting months at a time dating back 25 years. San Francisco, Sacramento, Orlando, Miami. Not a quick 2 week visit as a tourist.

The US is very false/pretentious, commercial, lacking substance and rustic charm. Terrible mass produced food, GMOs, poor quality, honestly the food is grim.

The newness of the country, the grid/block layout, generic new buildings with no history, no pubs or buildings with character. Advertisements everywhere, non stop, a country of upselling.

You do have more land/space/bigger cheaper houses, better salaries, cheaper cost of living generally. If you have money that doesn’t matter. More crime, high tax, expensive healthcare.

Wit and creativity are lacking, the kids are indoctrinated to be sheep. The CIA have really been doing a number on the population since 1947. Hence people like you claiming I’m jealous of your amazing country rather than critically thinking and contrasting to other places, doing your own research etc

I mainly dislike the supercharged politics, news channels (complete lies), corruption and general falseness of the conversations and people you meet.

Anyway it’s all just my opinion, I dont want you to think people are jealous of your power, that siege mentality that everyone hates your freedom is just more propaganda you have eaten up.

“I came to America because of the great, great freedom which I heard existed in this country. I made a mistake in selecting America as a land of freedom, a mistake I cannot repair in the balance of my lifetime.”

- Albert Einstein
 

Jesse Pinkman

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A whole bunch of waffle about celebrity, power and of course “the greatest country in the world” without backing up the claims. I think you should Google socialism/socialist countries, the great American education system at work again.

I speak as someone who lives, not visited, in America for years with regular visits lasting months at a time dating back 25 years. San Francisco, Sacramento, Orlando, Miami. Not a quick 2 week visit as a tourist.

The US is very false/pretentious, commercial, lacking substance and rustic charm. Terrible mass produced food, GMOs, poor quality, honestly the food is grim.

The newness of the country, the grid/block layout, generic new buildings with no history, no pubs or buildings with character. Advertisements everywhere, non stop, a country of upselling.

You do have more land/space/bigger cheaper houses, better salaries, cheaper cost of living generally. If you have money that doesn’t matter. More crime, high tax, expensive healthcare.

Wit and creativity are lacking, the kids are indoctrinated to be sheep. The CIA have really been doing a number on the population since 1947. Hence people like you claiming I’m jealous of your amazing country rather than critically thinking and contrasting to other places, doing your own research etc

I mainly dislike the supercharged politics, news channels (complete lies), corruption and general falseness of the conversations and people you meet.

Anyway it’s all just my opinion, I dont want you to think people are jealous of your power, that siege mentality that everyone hates your freedom is just more propaganda you have eaten up.

“I came to America because of the great, great freedom which I heard existed in this country. I made a mistake in selecting America as a land of freedom, a mistake I cannot repair in the balance of my lifetime.”

- Albert Einstein
People say we are all that but welcome to the western world, don't like that? Well then go to a third world country where you will lack common resources. TBH, as someone who has stayed in various Western European countries, I find it hilarious when Europeans knock Americans on anything. Western Europe is just as pretentious, arrogant, and a hotbed of locals that are self-righteous yet intolerant at the same time.

Europeans in general have such a massive inferiority complex towards Americans because we have been far more relevant than anywhere in Europe for decades. In reality, it is indeed all envy. They want to go back to being the dominant powers they were a while ago and hate that American is now that dominant power, especially in terms of culture. TBH, I found Europeans as a whole to be far more shallow, judgmental, rude, self-righteous, and arrogant than Americans.

Oh and how can you judge America while never having lived in cities like Chicago and NYC?
 
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This is another advice post and while @SW15 and I have done our fair share of city guides, I wanted this guide to be the blueprint for all of you in terms of picking your next city to move to. Here's the kicker, the answer will be different based on each and every one of you.

How guys do it wrong and how NOT to do it.

Most guys think "oh hot girls" or "whoa good gender ratios" and immediately make their choice based on that. As I have commented all too much, I have known a lot of guys from San Francisco who came to NYC in hopes of a better dating life because they heard the ratios were better. In almost all instances, their dating lives barely improved. In fact, these guys were even more miserable when they found that NYC had colder winters and people that were more blunt and rude. I've heard similar stories from guys who move from western European countries to EE but I am sure @Who Dares Win can comment more on this.

So in case you missed my point, never make women and date your sole reason for picking your next city.

Here is a good litmus test on how solid your choice is, can you list at least 3 things you like about a city other than the women and the dating scene? If you can, you have a legitimate choice. It could be the politics, the culture, the food, the music scene, and the unique aspects of that city itself. If you can list at least 3 of those things, you'll have a happy life. If it has at least 200k people, you have no excuse.

I know of one of my friends who struggled a lot with women in NYC even though he had opportunities. The issue is that he was not happy in the city, it wore him out. So where does he move? Seattle. Idiot right? Seattle. The city you do not move to for the women. Fast forward to a couple years later, he has dated a brunette that's a solid 8 and an Asian-white mix with almost model looks. Yes, the women in city are hideous compared to NYC but it's still a big f-ckin city.

How it all kind of works.

Here is how the thing overall works.

1. You subconsciously take women off the pedestal.

Think about it, you move to a city just for the women and the dating scene, you are putting women on the pedestal. You literally took your resources and physically made a big move solely to get laid. No matter how much research it was based on, you made the move for women alone. You put women on the pedestal and based your entire happiness of the move on how much you get laid. Now say you did it for 3 other reasons, you're likely to be happier since women are not a part of it.

2. Due to 1, you are likely to be happier.

You are likely to enjoy life regardless of how much success you are having with women. Some women are likely to pick up on this and actually like your vibe. This is likely to get them to give you a chance because you are not coming off as desperate.

3. You have a higher ceiling even outside of game.

You are likely to make friends, get invited to fancier events, and have a social circle because people love your energy. You might even discover some of your talents and for all we know, be that musician at a local bar. Who knows. Even if the city is supposedly bad for dating, it works out for you.

Don't go to a city for the women, don't even go to a country for that. Pick a place which has 3 things you are likely to love outside of dating.

My choice to go to Miami.

Men consider Miami to be a tough city for game. Yeah you have hot girls but you also have a lot of rich dudes throwing money around, poor gender ratios, dudes flooding in from everywhere after the pandemic, stuck up women, and a lot of guys in good shape with the beach body. Miami is one of the cities the world said not to go to for game. I went anyways because:

1. It is a very international city
2. I love Latin culture
3. Florida is amazing with De Santis as Governor and Miami is surprisingly quite Republican due to the Cuban population

You may disagree with me on all 3 points, I do not care but they were strong enough in Miami to get me to consider moving.

I know of guys who solely went for the hot girls, they didn't last. I have had a great time with Miami as a result and am afraid I might end up being here longer than I want. @Jake_Gyllenhaal69 had the exact opposite experience with Nashville.
In NYC there’s my type of girl - models. It’s the fashion hub of the country.
 

Murk

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People say we are all that but welcome to the western world, don't like that? Well then go to a third world country where you will lack common resources. TBH, as someone who has stayed in various Western European countries, I find it hilarious when Europeans knock Americans on anything. Western Europe is just as pretentious, arrogant, and a hotbed of locals that are self-righteous yet intolerant at the same time.

Europeans in general have such a massive inferiority complex towards Americans because we have been far more relevant than anywhere in Europe for decades. In reality, it is indeed all envy. They want to go back to being the dominant powers they were a while ago and hate that American is now that dominant power, especially in terms of culture. TBH, I found Europeans as a whole to be far more shallow, judgmental, rude, self-righteous, and arrogant than Americans.

Oh and how can you judge America while never having lived in cities like Chicago and NYC?
Another one showing ignorance. Europeans are so diverse culturally, you think me being raised in London has the same outlook as a Pole or Ukrainian? Italian or Spanish? Scandinavians are completely different (Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Finland). You like the other poster are talking out of your arse so just stop. You haven’t been anywhere.

It’s not an inferiority complex, you’re not superior to Canada let alone anywhere else.
 
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Another one showing ignorance. Europeans are so diverse culturally, you think me being raised in London has the same outlook as a Pole or Ukrainian? Italian or Spanish? Scandinavians are completely different (Norway, Denmark, Sweden, Finland). You like the other poster are talking out of your arse so just stop. You haven’t been anywhere.

It’s not an inferiority complex, you’re not superior to Canada let alone anywhere else.
America is pretty diverse as well. A lot of people seem to ignore the fact that we are basically a continent not part of a continent like most countries. Now the US does have its cons and there are things around these cons, but Europeans do have a habit of portraying the US as this literal hell hole and Europe as this Disney land paradise which comes off as an inferiority complex like Jessie said.
 

Murk

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America is pretty diverse as well. A lot of people seem to ignore the fact that we are basically a continent not part of a continent like most countries. Now the US does have its cons and there are things around these cons, but Europeans do have a habit of portraying the US as this literal hell hole and Europe as this Disney land paradise which comes off as an inferiority complex like Jessie said.
Europe is **** mate, there’s no patriotism here from me I accept Europe is mostly a sh1t hole and most of the UK too. I would never live anywhere except London (nowhere else in UK is worth it), Scandinavia or possibly Miami (only to be close to my family there).

I think we have to face the fact governments are destroying every country and it’s all going downhill. Banks are now purchasing housing, companies no longer accepting cash, Black Rock and Vanguard rejoice they own our planet.
 

Travel memoir21

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I agree for the most part on finding a city which fits your vibe.....

I consider myself a fairly conservative dude, but I can see myself living in a place like Austin Texas because of the music, art and bbq scene there. Plus I wouldn't mind dating and hanging out with a hipster chick or two....just can't see myself marrying one though lol
 

BillyPilgrim

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Europe is **** mate, there’s no patriotism here from me I accept Europe is mostly a sh1t hole and most of the UK too. I would never live anywhere except London (nowhere else in UK is worth it), Scandinavia or possibly Miami (only to be close to my family there).

I think we have to face the fact governments are destroying every country and it’s all going downhill. Banks are now purchasing housing, companies no longer accepting cash, Black Rock and Vanguard rejoice they own our planet.
I just feel for your guys when the food crunch starts in earnest. You guys have sh1t to eat to begin with, I've been to London.
 

Murk

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I just feel for your guys when the food crunch starts in earnest. You guys have sh1t to eat to begin with, I've been to London.
We have way higher quality food, fresh food, not GMO food.


Please, just scan this - look at the difference in ingredients between the same brands in UK vs USA. I noticed it myself, your food taste like sh!t, the quality is sh!t, you have not lived.

I've also stockpiled provisions for food shortages since 2020, I will outlast you.
 

Zimbabwe

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If you found a good city with great ratios, you would have no reason to share your secret. I've seen venues turn into sausage fests just from word of mouth.

It only takes a handful of daygamers spam approaching to ruin an entire an entire city
 

BillyPilgrim

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We have way higher quality food, fresh food, not GMO food.


Please, just scan this - look at the difference in ingredients between the same brands in UK vs USA. I noticed it myself, your food taste like sh!t, the quality is sh!t, you have not lived.

I've also stockpiled provisions for food shortages since 2020, I will outlast you.
I was there in the 90's, the difference was marked then.

Is there anyplace you *do* like?

Maybe if you guys had good herb you could chill a little bit. Might help with the bug up your @ss and the chip on your shoulder, good sir.
 
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MatureDJ

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In order to find a female over 25 that at least had a bachelors degree and no children, I had to expand my search to 35 miles (and even then, it wasn't plentiful or very pretty).
It was 3500+ miles for me, and it has been virtually infinitely more plentiful (i.e., since anything divided by zero is infinity :rolleyes: ).
 
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