All of this rejection is making me depressed

[DonBud94]

Case in point: Spam Approach advice.

OP, if you are doing daygame then lots of rejection is normal. But here's the key - how is she rejecting you? I see a daygame rejection as not getting a bang. I think that at the very least 1 in 10 women should be giving you their number. If every single woman you approach is saying No and telling you that she has a Boyfriend, then you need to work on your cold approach skills.

If you're doing OLD and you are getting matches and they aren't wanting to meet you, then you have bad text game and you need to fix it.

Yeah. What he said,

 

[Francis]

There's a mistaken belief that success with women is a numbers game - "if you approach 200 women, 1 will be available" - this is otherwise known as spam approaching and, where I'm from, we basically piss on guys who do that.

It is a number's game for sure, but you shouldn't have to spam approach like you said. It's more along the lines of, if you find a woman you like, go for it. And there should be plenty of those around. You shouldn't limit yourself, but your odds of success shouldn't be outrageously bad either.

Women are too flaky, indecisive, unpredictable, etc to be relied upon. Doesn't matter if they have high interest in you -- it doesn't mean it's in the bag, or that they won't find someone else who lives 2 blocks closer. Gotta keep dating around and finding new prospects.

 

[Zimbabwe]

Don't mean to come off as harsh, bro. But this spam approaching/"It's a numbers Game" mentality has to be nuked.

It is Indian Taxi Driver level creepy.

Exactly a guy needs to calibrate his approach accordingly after each rejection, try different stuff and see what works best with his style.

You are right Indians spam approach with zero game and think it's a viable strategy.

 

[Robert28]

The rejections of cold approaching are NOTHING to get over. Same with online matches who never go on dates with you. It’s the ones you’ve spent time getting to know and been out with several times that mess with your mind.

 

[DonBud94]

Don't mean to come off as harsh, bro. But this spam approaching/"It's a numbers Game" mentality has to be nuked.

It is Indian Taxi Driver level creepy.

You good, I dint even know spam approach was a thing.
I write what I do and how I do.

 

[Francis]

It's a numbers game only in so-much that you actually have to do approaches.

Beyond that it really is all down to your approach skills.

Here's reality. No woman is actually "taken" in this current world. Hypergamy is rampant. Even if she has a BF or is married, then that will not stop her if she digs you. In fact, in many cases women in relationships are easier because the dude she's with is a beta (by the very definition) because he has committed to her. Commitment is Beta, unfortunately, so when a woman says that she "has a boyfriend", whether it's true or not, it just means that she's not attracted to you.

Right, I am aware of that (to a degree, not everyone is disloyal). Most of the women who have shown interest in me were already taken. These days it is usually married women, and they are mostly interested in sex. (Back in the day I went the relationship route, thinking that's what they wanted, lol. So naive.) I can't recall a time where I was given the boyfriend line, so that doesn't apply here.

We might just disagree on the numbers game part. Some girls aren't going to dig you no matter what, and you have to keep trying with other prospects. Just a simple fact of life. No one is going to attract everyone, whether that's friendships, dating or otherwise. Best to keep trying with anyone you find attractive -- it doesn't have to be super serious.

 

[zinc4]

I feel you, man. I'm in the middle of a demoralizing losing streak right now - it helps to know you're not the only one going through it, though.

I got rejected by this Mexican girl a week or two ago after she had continued showing strong signs of interest for a bit. I look back objectively at the date, and quite frankly, I seriously can't point the finger at where I went wrong.

I damn near deported her ass after the kiss rejection....puta.

It is what it is. I'm improving significantly in several other aspects of my life right now, so that keeps me going.

Mexican girls are difficult to deal with in general. Venezuelans are the easiest latinas to deal with imo. Mexicanas are all putas imo.

 

[flipflip]

I think I'm gonna forget about regular women and just have sex with escorts. It's not fullfilling but at least its fun

 

[Francis]

This would make sense if women were purely visual creatures. They are not. Men are different. For example, I hate fat chicks and nothing she could say or do could ever change my mind. If she's fat she's out.

Women are much more wholistic. It largely comes down to how you make her "feel". This comes from a combination of communication, body language and an ability to manipulate her emotions. This really does mean that any woman, feasibly, can be banged if you touch her mind in the right way. Some women are unavailable to all men because of her emotional state on that day, this is true. Maybe her dog died or something. But this is rare IMO.

Reality is that most rejections are down to the guy just not turning her on. I see too many average looking guys with awesome Game bang hot women to ignore that fact that success is largely dependent on your communication abilities and swag around women.

Could be. All I know is that for myself and people I've known who were successful with women, it was largely about looks. Perhaps there were other attractive traits that I didn't / don't pay much attention to, such as confidence, personality, social skills, status, etc, because that was there as well.

I personally never chased a woman, and was pretty closed off for a long time, so inadvertently it could've been my aloofness and disinterest viewed as a "challenge" that also sparked their interest. There's a lot of variables that probably go unnoticed.

 

[Robert28]

This would make sense if women were purely visual creatures. They are not. Men are different. For example, I hate fat chicks and nothing she could say or do could ever change my mind. If she's fat she's out.

Women are much more wholistic. It largely comes down to how you make her "feel". This comes from a combination of communication, body language and an ability to manipulate her emotions. This really does mean that any woman, feasibly, can be banged if you touch her mind in the right way. Some women are unavailable to all men because of her emotional state on that day, this is true. Maybe her dog died or something. But this is rare IMO.

Reality is that most rejections are down to the guy just not turning her on. I see too many average looking guys with awesome Game bang hot women to ignore that fact that success is largely dependent on your communication abilities and swag around women.

This is true but not entirely. Women absolutely are visual creatures. If they weren’t, they wouldn’t care about such things like height, tattoos, hairlines, etc. A good looking guy with bad game will Trump an average guy with tight game 99% of the time. She’s going to give that good looking guy more leeway, more benefit of the doubt, more chances to mess up while gaming her. You will never make her emotional being an average guy, she honestly won’t care what type of game you try to run on her.

 

[Focal core]

Wimmen got rejected all the times, even worst pump n dump by the guy they want.. Keep approaching men.. Show that interest.. Nothing wrong with that.

 

[Robert28]

You've got it in reverse, my friend. And you'll do a lot better with women when you come to terms with this fact of life:

An average looking guy with tight game will trump a handsome dude with no game. Every single time. I see it all the time. Being handsome and not having game is actually a death sentence because it's so incongruous. If you're handsome then a woman expects you to have Game. If you don't have Game and you're handsome she'll get really confused and a bit creeped out.

An average guy with tight game may get her to go on a date, may get her to date for awhile I’m between Chad’s, but he will NEVER own her mind and emotions like Chad. Being handsome with minimal game gets you a ton of free passes and chances that normal guys with tight game don’t get. That’s why they HAVE to have such tight game, they’d never get anywhere if they didn’t. Chad gets chances the average guy will never even dream of getting.

 

[Robert28]

Wimmen got rejected all the times, even worst pump n dump by the guy they want.. Keep approaching men.. Show that interest.. Nothing wrong with that.

That’s not rejection though. These women are fvcking around with guys they have no business fvcking around with or they’re trying to bat out of their league.

 

[flipflip]

Just focus on your goals, bro. It's a much more productive use of your time.

For the record, escorts have feelings too! Just kidding. But I think what you suffer from is what's called a Madonna-wh0re complex where you categorize women into either good/innocent or bad/slutty. This is too black & white and inevitably leads to you getting played. The movie Taxi driver describes this reasonably well.

Tbh I dont trust any women anymore. I had an ex who loved me one day and ghosted me the next. It really ****ed with my mind. Modern dating/relationships are brutal. It really doesnt feel like its worth it anymore. I feel like I'm chasing a mirage and it's time to quit.

 

[Robert28]

Tbh I dont trust any women anymore. I had an ex who loved me one day and ghosted me the next. It really ****ed with my mind. Modern dating/relationships are brutal. It really doesnt feel like its worth it anymore. I feel like I'm chasing a mirage and it's time to quit.

That’s honestly the way to be.

 

[SW15]

Honestly I just stick to meeting girls naturally in person. I’ll meet less girls compared to online dating but my mental health is MUCH better doing that.

I believe it. The most common outcome from website dating (pre-2012) or swipe app dating is the "one date, no sex, no second date" sort of date. Having too many failed dates from swipe apps is bound to cause psychological damage.

There's a mistaken belief that success with women is a numbers game - "if you approach 200 women, 1 will be available" - this is otherwise known as spam approaching and, where I'm from, we basically piss on guys who do that. It's a form of simping. It's usually Indian PUAs who spam approach and get nowhere, but maintain insane positivity about it and just keep pushing on. Indian guys have developed a very creepy reputation for this very reason.

Holy smokes! I've observed the same things with men of Indian ancestry too. Indian men are amazing at spam approaching. I have no idea how they do it. I've seen Indian men in my metro area spam approach white women like there was no tomorrow. I can't recall ever seeing a college educated white male do as many approaches as some Indian men I've seen.

Here's reality. No woman is actually "taken" in this current world. Hypergamy is rampant. Even if she has a BF or is married, then that will not stop her if she digs you. In fact, in many cases women in relationships are easier because the dude she's with is a beta (by the very definition) because he has committed to her. Commitment is Beta, unfortunately, so when a woman says that she "has a boyfriend", whether it's true or not, it just means that she's not attracted to you.

I have come to believe in pushing back when hearing the "IHAB" line, which I didn't do until roughly age 30 (38 now). Many times the boyfriend is fictional and many times she's not all too happy. I have heard "IHAB" less in the past decade so that makes me think that women have gotten more sophisticated in excuse making resistance.

 

[Focal core]

That’s not rejection though. These women are fvcking around with guys they have no business fvcking around with or they’re trying to bat out of their league.

They always trying to date up, made no mistake tho these wimmen crying being treated such ways. They will reject average guy tho and riding that cc.Those aren't worthy of dating for most men . Its still sky high difference Compared to that to men that has been soft rejected.

 

[Focal core]

Tbh I dont trust any women anymore. I had an ex who loved me one day and ghosted me the next. It really ****ed with my mind. Modern dating/relationships are brutal. It really doesnt feel like its worth it anymore. I feel like I'm chasing a mirage and it's time to quit.

Im an asian.. Not thailand or viet.. Here feminism are growing, the heat are getting worse, im off dating for a while now and at this pandemic many stay with their men even the man are out of shape. Expecting things to flip once endemic to comes in few month.. I bet these girl are prep for leaving.

 

[Hamurabimbi]

Yeah, it's a topic that's popular on this forum. What's more important? Looks? Money? Status?

I say Game is the most important. Then Looks, Money, Status.

Another favorite debating topic. Like height vs. face vs. body. My thought is that guys who succeed with Looks, will list Looks as most important. Status guys will list Status as most important. And so on.

 

[Focal core]

Another favorite debating topic. Like height vs. face vs. body. My thought is that guys who succeed with Looks, will list Looks as most important. Status guys will list Status as most important. And so on.

We are men are we! Shout out loud with me. Hold my beer