Why have my girlfriends hated my energy?

[firstbornunicorn]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

 

[christie]

Maybe try to find girls with same energy level.
Make it a challenge to yourself to find one with more energy than you.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

Not sure how your positive get it done energy is unhealthy. The ones who like to bring me down tend to be hateful and complainers.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

they want attention.

I used to run into this hilarious dichotomy where they would nag me to spend time, so I would forego the gym, gain weight, and then they would lose attraction. They really do want the jacked rich guy that that never has to work at either.

So they don't like when the man is focused on his mission, they want that attention for themselves?

 

[christie]

they want attention.


They really do want the jacked rich guy that that never has to work at either.

These things exactly.
#1 getting your attention means you're not giving it to another woman
#2 jacked with very little upkeep or maintenance effort means you've got excellent genetics
#3 rich means free from working obligations. i.e. you're at the level your money is making money in perpetuity/perpetual motion with little effort from you 'while you sleep' so-to-speak.

So comforting to read that you understand this LARaiders85.
Of course, this perfect man does not exist.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Well said. You basically said in one post what I learned over 10 years of keenly listening to women and reading between the lines. #2 in particular was shocking to learn, I have built good, clean muscle over the years and it was still criticized on those grounds.

Even pro athletes get fat when they stop training. So just keep her out of your gym business. Let it appear to be always like that.

 

[Romanemp22]

Fvck her off. I couldn't stand being around that life drainer.

 

[christie]

Well said. You basically said in one post what I learned over 10 years of keenly listening to women and reading between the lines. #2 in particular was shocking to learn, I have built good, clean muscle over the years and it was still criticized on those grounds.

you said it first, so thank you.

I still don't know why women find it hard to have overt communication.
The insecurity for their safety/life?

Man, you must have great genetics if you were able to reach that superb fitness and muscular level. And guess what? You can do it again and it would be hard at first for all the regular reasons but I'm excited for you when you reach that seemingly overnight whoosh of a body composition change.
Muscles indeed do have memory just like the video WhoDaresWin? shared a little while ago.

I guess, now that we know this dichotomy of women, one can game them on it. You know how with the number 2 ideal?
Hide your workout details, frequency and effort.
Make your attained physique seem effortless.
Might have to wake up at 3:30am a couple times a week to hide this amount of real work you put into it.

 

[bcude]

I guess, now that we know this dichotomy of women, one can game them on it. You know how with the number 2 ideal?
Hide your workout details, frequency and effort.
Make your attained physique seem effortless.
Might have to wake up at 3:30am a couple times a week to hide this amount of real work you put into it.

How about doing what you want, as in pursuing your passions and she's to wake up from her delusions about perfect men and live with it?
If she's has a problem with her man putting effort and time into working out and bettering himself, then the problem is her.

Now it could be the case that the man isn't present with her when they actually spend time together. Time as in quality time and she's crying for more connection, but if it's not, she's just a miserable complainer with a different worldview and a bad match for OP, so walking away would be the sensible thing to do since she'll drag him down eventually and turn into a liability anyway, which she sounds like from the description.

Miserable people hate to see happy people so they try to bring them down to their level.

 

[bat soup]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

Why did you let them into your house?

 

[christie]

How about doing what you want, as in pursuing your passions and she's to wake up from her delusions about perfect men and live with it?
If she's has a problem with her man putting effort and time into working out and bettering himself, then the problem is her.

Now it could be the case that the man isn't present with her when they actually spend time together. Time as in quality time and she's crying for more connection, but if it's not, she's just a miserable complainer with a different worldview and a bad match for OP, so walking away would be the sensible thing to do since she'll drag him down eventually and turn into a liability anyway, which she sounds like from the description.

Miserable people hate to see happy people so they try to bring them down to their level.

I agree.

It would be stunning to discover a man is passionate about working out, building muscle. I don't know any around me that like doing this, that take pleasure in this.

I hope to meet men around me like this. It means that I must also make this my passion in order to cross paths.

 

[EyeOnThePrize]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

These types of women are either extremely insecure or delusional.

If delusional then they want a man that's jacked but never works out. A man that's rich but never does business. A smart man that never reads, etc.

It's the projection of a childish fantasy. When you don't conform to that fantasy they blame and resent you. The movies they grew up with didn't show how much work goes into everything, they only saw results. And it speaks to how little they challenge themselves, otherwise they'd understand.

Or if it comes from insecurity then she doesn't want you looking better than her or being around more attractive/ambitious women. She would rather sabotage you then work to come up to your level, because that's easier for her than working on herself. She resents you for having a stronger work ethic than her.

If a woman ever gets pissed at me for going to the gym or working out I would seriously consider dumping her. The healthy women I've dated have all been enthusiastic and supportive of it.

Think about it, if she really wanted to be a part of your life she would find a positive way to support you, not shiit on you.

Trying to punish you for working on your health is the exact opposite. You shouldn't let her get away with this.

Keep lifting and her true colors will show. She'll either buckle, become extremely submissive/positive, and wrap herself around your little finger, or you'll end up getting rid of her because you'll realize you've become much higher value while she's stagnated or even regressed.

 

[Mister_Skinny_Jeanz]

this happens whenever she feels like she is not getting the attention she wants , especially if you live with her.
but you cant let her bring you down and stop you from going on hikes and lifting weights.
its not your energy , it's the lack of hers .. sounds like she just wants to lay around and expect you to magically remain in shape.
you dont have to get rude or mean , but if it was me i would let her know how important i take my physical and mental health, everyone should understand and respect that.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

Maybe you are seeing it the way you want to see it but are not taking time to view it from the way she sees it. In essence, you believe the perspective that you view it is the perspective that SHE should view it but the truth is she is going to see it from the perspective that she does.

So then the question becomes how does she see it and more importantly what is causing her to not see it the same way you do?

Why would you invite her hiking of you already know she doesn't like doing what you are doing? To me that just seems inconsiderate and honestly rude. If it happened once and you didn't know it's one thing. To keep inviting her when you know you have different ideas is counterproductive and honestly makes no sense. You are creating a conflict for no real reason. Just let her know you want to go by yourself because you know she doesn't like that pace and maybe let her know you will go walk later with her or another day. Or whatever.

Thr main crux I get out of this is you feel that you should be able to do whatever you want in a relationship and that's cool. And it is cool. But not if you want to be in a relationship. It's cool if you want to be single. If you want to be in a relationship then there has to be some sort of compromise. Not only do you seem to be unwilling to do this, you seem amazed she would see it like that. This tells me you could probably use a lot of work on empathy and social awareness.

These are trivial, ridiculous things to be drawing lines in the sand in terms of overall relationship issues and if you are so unwavering and uncompromising with little things like this she probably feels when big problems arise it's going to be more of the same thing.

So as to why they seem to hate your energy? Because you seem to be very self-centered and selfish in terms of a relationship with another person but maybe not necessarily because you are but because you don't view it as that way, which is the way it likely looks to her because that's the way it looks to me. Notice how everything you talk about is what YOU want to do.

Just my two cents from an unbiased observer.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

 

[firstbornunicorn]

Damn. This is 100% of what happened over 3 years(living together), and the latest one started doing the same thing. Can't chill at all around these creatures.

 

[lostintime]

I come home from work after a hard day, and I just want to grab my gym gear and head to the gym.

It's morning, I want to get up and cook breakfast, maybe dance and a sing a little whilst doing it.

It's Saturday morning, and I want to get up, and go hiking after speeding through breakfast. On the hike, I go fast and run a little.

This ANGERS my girlfriend. I have to go at her pace, or she loses her ****. She wants to "chill" after work before going to the gym, but we all know it won't happen if we do.

I've noticed that whenever I'm happy, girlfriends lose their **** and bring me right down to wherever they are. What is it? I'm open to the idea that the energy I'm giving off isn't healthy, but to me it seems like something else is the case.

They see you as out of their league and are sabotaging your success in a effort to keep you mediocre and their anxiety in check. It's some evil sh*t when you think about it..

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Damn. This is 100% of what happened over 3 years(living together), and the latest one started doing the same thing. Can't chill at all around these creatures.

Shes "in charge "

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Shes "in charge "

Reread his post. He seems very self centered and selfish in terms of being in an LTR. Its all about what he wants. That doesn't work in an LTR.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Reread his post. He seems very self centered and selfish in terms of being in an LTR. Its all about what he wants. That doesn't work in an LTR.

We're always on the females case here. So I assumed she was more selfish and he's forced to be more selfish as a result. But you're right.