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How do you guys deal with beer desire?

Blacksheep

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Im trying to quit alcohol, but when comes friday or someday I was really tired, I feel this desire grab a beer and drink playing some dota.

But with that comes a guilt feeling, that I will get fat and this is not going to be good to health, etc...

Would like to hear some ideas about.
 

Alvafe

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moderation is always a good call.

though I really can't say I have a desire for beer, or anything really, also not buying then thend to amke things harder to accomplish
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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The key to combatting distraction is to have a plan... You could drink beer, smoke weed, play video games, but then what? Where will that leave you physically and mentally? What will leave you in a better space?

At the same time, a guy has to decompress, just not every night.
 

EyeBRollin

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Just replace with a non alcoholic drink. I got into the bad habit of beer or wine with dinner Last year. I was up to two drinks every day. I switched to apple juice. Went through covid lockdown without having a single drink. It was actually simple since it was less about the alcohol and mostly a taste habit.
 

Blacksheep

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moderation is always a good call.

though I really can't say I have a desire for beer, or anything really, also not buying then thend to amke things harder to accomplish
That's true!

When I saw I was overdrink I just put all the drinks into trash to made me buy it again if I want. But I'm still trying to understand what gives me that desire and how to find something similar to generate this same feeling on a healthy way.

Cause if I start drinking that I'm always affraid of drinking too much and too often.
 

Blacksheep

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The key to combatting distraction is to have a plan... You could drink beer, smoke weed, play video games, but then what? Where will that leave you physically and mentally? What will leave you in a better space?

At the same time, a guy has to decompress, just not every night.
Thats a interesting thought!

Thinking about that, any drugs don't take us anywhere... just have bad consequences, so in logically it doesn't worth at all.

About decompress, what do you mean? Like doing something to relax and rest?
 

Blacksheep

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Just replace with a non alcoholic drink. I got into the bad habit of beer or wine with dinner Last year. I was up to two drinks every day. I switched to apple juice. Went through covid lockdown without having a single drink. It was actually simple since it was less about the alcohol and mostly a taste habit.
Yesterday instead of drinking I just ate a pizza with a non sugar soda. Not the best thing, but it was less harmful than the alcohol side effects.

Maybe I can focus on find alternatives that generates some similar pleasure effect than alcohol. At least until I get used to be without it. I'm 13 days off I guess... In the beginning its the most difficult.
 

EyeBRollin

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Yesterday instead of drinking I just ate a pizza with a non sugar soda. Not the best thing, but it was less harmful than the alcohol side effects.

Maybe I can focus on find alternatives that generates some similar pleasure effect than alcohol. At least until I get used to be without it. I'm 13 days off I guess... In the beginning its the most difficult.
What helped me is just find a drink that has similar taste to your favorite alcoholic drinks. It really was a taste thing for me.
 

Blacksheep

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What helped me is just find a drink that has similar taste to your favorite alcoholic drinks. It really was a taste thing for me.
Maybe I can try a no alcohol beer and see if that works. This is a interesting idea. Idk if it taste the same as normal beer or if I just drink beer to feel that relaxed state, but I'm gonna try that!
 

EyeOnThePrize

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There are a million ways to deal with a tempting vice. Like others have said, the key is to plan out the day and time you want to drink, along with a time and day to stop. If you've worked on improving yourself all week then enjoying a Friday night with a beer shouldn't feel guilty, it should feel like a much needed break from slaying your dragons.

If it makes you feel guilty then maybe deep down you believe you could have worked harder, or maybe you don't trust yourself to stop or overcome temptation. I'd advise making a plan and sticking to it. Sticking to it will increase self confidence and faith in your own resolve.

For example I have a rule to only let loose Friday nights. Saturday no matter how much I want to continue partying I will myself to start working on personal projects and getting shiit done instead.

I also plan week or month long vacations, and I have plans for the vacations as well. For instance I will have a plan to visit cities x, y, z, on day 1,2,3 and to only party certain days/times at certain places. Planning out like this makes for amazing experiences because I also plan for spontaneous things to happen. For example I always carry a condom but don't ever plan out sex, only windows for partying and being spontaneous.

Make a plan and stick to it. If you can't stick to it then keep changing it until you can. Then incrementally change it to be inline with your ideal self. It's amazing how many people don't realize this.

When you're confident in your plan you'll be confident in your power of self control and will learn to truly relax and enjoy yourself in those windows without guilt. In the past you may have drank to escape. Slowly change that to drinking to indulge.

Don't see partying as a drag. Use it as a break from working your as$ off. If I didn't party I would burnout, that's how hard I push myself in my craft. I look forward to that break and feel satisfied, never guilty.

It's good to see that you are working on yourself @Blacksheep
 

Blacksheep

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There are a million ways to deal with a tempting vice. Like others have said, the key is to plan out the day and time you want to drink, along with a time and day to stop. If you've worked on improving yourself all week then enjoying a Friday night with a beer shouldn't feel guilty, it should feel like a much needed break from slaying your dragons.

If it makes you feel guilty then maybe deep down you believe you could have worked harder, or maybe you don't trust yourself to stop or overcome temptation. I'd advise making a plan and sticking to it. Sticking to it will increase self confidence and faith in your own resolve.

For example I have a rule to only let loose Friday nights. Saturday no matter how much I want to continue partying I will myself to start working on personal projects and getting shiit done instead.

I also plan week or month long vacations, and I have plans for the vacations as well. For instance I will have a plan to visit cities x, y, z, on day 1,2,3 and to only party certain days/times at certain places. Planning out like this makes for amazing experiences because I also plan for spontaneous things to happen. For example I always carry a condom but don't ever plan out sex, only windows for partying and being spontaneous.

Make a plan and stick to it. If you can't stick to it then keep changing it until you can. Then incrementally change it to be inline with your ideal self. It's amazing how many people don't realize this.

When you're confident in your plan you'll be confident in your power of self control and will learn to truly relax and enjoy yourself in those windows without guilt. In the past you may have drank to escape. Slowly change that to drinking to indulge.

Don't see partying as a drag. Use it as a break from working your as$ off. If I didn't party I would burnout, that's how hard I push myself in my craft. I look forward to that break and feel satisfied, never guilty.

It's good to see that you are working on yourself @Blacksheep
Thats a great feedback man! Thank you so much! =)

It seems a good way to deal with that... Also I know when I drink a beer to relax and give a break for the week its not harmful. But I also know that when I used to drink being sad or after some stress conversation with my dad, I used to drink heavy and emotionally... not to enjoy a moment or to relax... And this is a dangerous situation I have to avoid at any cost.

I'm gonna practice this, making some plans for the week and put some time to relax and do something pleasurable.

Guilty is something I'm still learning to handle... I grew up on a complicated environment with my parents. As scapegoat he always invalidated everything I did (like enjoying sports, games, or anything he couldn't relate with) and said bullsh1ts to made me feel guilty about that. Most of times I remember to feel myself as a mistake child and that I shouldn't be borned at all.

I can say that this year was my first year of being real alive, and it seems I'm learning to regulate all those stuffs. Like reprograming my mind as I'm out of that toxic environment. And its being amazing... I'm feeling more peaceful and even having some difficulty I'm improving a lot.

I'm very grateful for this forum. You and a lot of guys I've met here helped me in a way that I will be in eternal debt.

Wish you all the best man! =D
 

CAPSLOCK BANDIT

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The guilt is not inherently a bad thing, it just drives you to stick your fingers in as many pies as you can, the rationalization being that maybe through purpose, your guilt will go away and it will not, it will only get worse.

Your probably coming out of a phase of lashing out from your guilt... Instead of a single vice, you took on every vice you could with reckless abandon... It is a common thing.

I have been studying guilt my whole life, from my parents raising my brother who is developmentally disabled to working in other families homes, watch how they use Sugar as a tool to alleviate their guilt with their developmentally disabled children, then end up with an out of control 300 lb. Monster in their home.

Guilt is a tough thing to deal with for sure, but it usually involves professional help and it can take years.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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Thats a great feedback man! Thank you so much! =)

It seems a good way to deal with that... Also I know when I drink a beer to relax and give a break for the week its not harmful. But I also know that when I used to drink being sad or after some stress conversation with my dad, I used to drink heavy and emotionally... not to enjoy a moment or to relax... And this is a dangerous situation I have to avoid at any cost.

I'm gonna practice this, making some plans for the week and put some time to relax and do something pleasurable.

Guilty is something I'm still learning to handle... I grew up on a complicated environment with my parents. As scapegoat he always invalidated everything I did (like enjoying sports, games, or anything he couldn't relate with) and said bullsh1ts to made me feel guilty about that. Most of times I remember to feel myself as a mistake child and that I shouldn't be borned at all.

I can say that this year was my first year of being real alive, and it seems I'm learning to regulate all those stuffs. Like reprograming my mind as I'm out of that toxic environment. And its being amazing... I'm feeling more peaceful and even having some difficulty I'm improving a lot.

I'm very grateful for this forum. You and a lot of guys I've met here helped me in a way that I will be in eternal debt.

Wish you all the best man! =D
That's great man. It can be easy to blame him or blame yourself, but when you sense this shift your focus to something more productive. The master blames no one.

Things that happened in your life were the unique ingredients that made you who you are today. The actions you've taken show that you are not weak, you are not oblivious, and that you are not ignorant. You are seeking the wisdom you feel you need, and are executing on it. The world can ask nothing more of you. You are completely unique, one of a kind.

Every corner will have new challenges. Pick goals then learn to enjoy the hard process of meeting them.

As men we love tough shiit that cuts our teeth into fangs, works our minds into sharp traps, works our bodies into machines. We love to test our hardware, improve, and overcome. That is the best feeling. And you are no exception.
 

Lucky666Dice

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I replaced beer with yerba mate. It's a ritual thing for me.

I go out occasionally(well, now I don't since the Corona King took over the world) and when I'm wandering through the city I let myself go with the beer-ban. I'm not going wild tho.

Working out & focusing on my passions got me into 'down-to-earth' state in which I know that if I did everything I planned for this week/month/whatever I can grab a few pints. Nothing wrong with it as long as you are controlling it, not the other way around.
 

Blacksheep

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The guilt is not inherently a bad thing, it just drives you to stick your fingers in as many pies as you can, the rationalization being that maybe through purpose, your guilt will go away and it will not, it will only get worse.

Your probably coming out of a phase of lashing out from your guilt... Instead of a single vice, you took on every vice you could with reckless abandon... It is a common thing.

I have been studying guilt my whole life, from my parents raising my brother who is developmentally disabled to working in other families homes, watch how they use Sugar as a tool to alleviate their guilt with their developmentally disabled children, then end up with an out of control 300 lb. Monster in their home.

Guilt is a tough thing to deal with for sure, but it usually involves professional help and it can take years.
That's true man. And its interesting how we use substances to alleviate that. On my worst and stressful days after my dad said or did something, it was a matter of time until I drunk too much or ate too much. And this was very negative to myself and my health.

Slowly I'm improving that... I don't feel as guilty as I used before... and it really take some time and therapy.
 

Blacksheep

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That's great man. It can be easy to blame him or blame yourself, but when you sense this shift your focus to something more productive. The master blames no one.

Things that happened in your life were the unique ingredients that made you who you are today. The actions you've taken show that you are not weak, you are not oblivious, and that you are not ignorant. You are seeking the wisdom you feel you need, and are executing on it. The world can ask nothing more of you. You are completely unique, one of a kind.

Every corner will have new challenges. Pick goals then learn to enjoy the hard process of meeting them.

As men we love tough shiit that cuts our teeth into fangs, works our minds into sharp traps, works our bodies into machines. We love to test our hardware, improve, and overcome. That is the best feeling. And you are no exception.
Thats true man!

Those hard roads make us strong. And its good to challenge ourselves.

I've created some goals I want to achieve untill the end of this year, to the end of next year and five years from now. And I'm gonna do my best to achieve it.
 

Blacksheep

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I replaced beer with yerba mate. It's a ritual thing for me.

I go out occasionally(well, now I don't since the Corona King took over the world) and when I'm wandering through the city I let myself go with the beer-ban. I'm not going wild tho.

Working out & focusing on my passions got me into 'down-to-earth' state in which I know that if I did everything I planned for this week/month/whatever I can grab a few pints. Nothing wrong with it as long as you are controlling it, not the other way around.
Thats right man!

I was thinking about the times I drunk too much and the times I only drink to relax and enjoy some beers... It's completely different.

Drinking when we are sad or on a bad emotional state is very destructive. But after a productive week that you just want to relax for a while, its not a problem.

Went to my uncle's farm yesterday, grab some beers and drink with them... It was a very good time. No hangovers, not feeling tired or nothing negative... just relaxed and fresh for this next week.
 

BackInTheGame78

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Im trying to quit alcohol, but when comes friday or someday I was really tired, I feel this desire grab a beer and drink playing some dota.

But with that comes a guilt feeling, that I will get fat and this is not going to be good to health, etc...

Would like to hear some ideas about.
I can't relate. I drink socially but at the same time, I literally could care less if I ever had a drink again in my life. Alcohol isn't important to me and never has been.

If you don't want to drink then don't order alcohol when you go out order water. I used to do this for years when I was really training hard and still going out.
 

Machine10033

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I enjoy relaxing with a few drinks...what I do is the days I’m planning on drinking is do an insane amount of volume and cardio while working out. I wait until after my last meal of the day and have a drink. From the insane amount of energy I expended from the workout as soon as I gave a glass of wine or 2-3 beers I’m pretty much falling asleep.
 

justhe_justin

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Im trying to quit alcohol, but when comes friday or someday I was really tired, I feel this desire grab a beer and drink playing some dota.

But with that comes a guilt feeling, that I will get fat and this is not going to be good to health, etc...

Would like to hear some ideas about.
2 years sober as of several weeks ago.

Cold turkey is by far the hardest way to quit anything. You have to replace your addiction with something just as satisfying or close to it. I'd say start slowly decreasing your beer into from 2 to 1.5 to 1 to 0.5 to nonalcoholic to... another drink or fulfilling activity you absolutely love as a distraction.

Also stay away from places and circumstances that will give you the urge to drink or even think about drinking. Means no clubs, bars, and avoid the beer section in the convenience store. Try not to hang out with people who will be drinking. Again, replace drinking with another social activity you like just as much. When you remove something, you've got to add something.
 
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