What should you do when you and a friend like the same girl

[17 shots]

The length isn't really the problem. Imagine what she'd think, when my name displays only for her to hear his voice

I brought up length because he's using YOUR prepaid minutes... forget about a woman, he's wasting your minutes

But if you're just loaded with minutes all the time and you dont care then ok. The principle of it, is what would make him not a friend to me. We can both go after the same women, who cares, but don't waste my prepaid minutes. Go talk to her yourself and get her number. Your friend is a loser honestly

 

[Dam44]

To expound on this...it isn't that she's trying to take you out. It's just the exact reason that spoiled brats harbor an uncontrollable seething rage towards the parents that spoiled them: they know they're being raised wrong, but don't know how to correct it on their own. Their parents are actually damaging them, by constantly catering to their whims.

A woman's primal instinct is to entrust herself to the care of a dominant man, who will provide for her, and protect her from harm, including from self-harm. So, if you let her do something stupid, she'll blame you, for being too weak to stop her, even if it was something she fought with you or snuck around behind your back, to do. She'll blame you for making her want to defy/betray you.

Female behavior doesn't make any logical sense to a man, because she's a grown woman, an "adult," and responsible for her own behavior(we're taught)....but in reality, masculinity is the only mark of human maturity that matters to nature. Only men are suited to prevail against the natural world.

Testosterone is the hormone that provides masculine virility, and she has a tiny fraction of the testosterone you have. A woman can become virilized, unnaturally, by injecting her with super-physiological doses of testosterone, over time, years, but that only proves my point, that feminity is a perpetual state of adolescence, at best, if not a form of infancy.

All of this begs the question as to whether you would really want things any other way. If you think it's unfair that men have been wired by nature to perpetually parent the feminine sex, the options are that women become artificially virilized, and barren, or that men become feminine, immature humans, or that women become virilized and barren, AND that men simultaneously become eunuchs. Either way, the sexes become unattractive to each other, and incapable of perpetuating the species.

So, as much as it may feel like an unfair burden to you, to be saddled with this weaker sex, and held accountable for all her failings, just think of them as children, and it makes it all much easier, and more pleasant to deal with the duty and honor of being a man.

I like this. well said

 

[Dam44]

Because they didnt build or or weren't part of your building. The environment they are a part of wants that done. Im really having a hard go of doing all this building then sliding in a female which had no part in it. Very high odds for her to start tearing down or taking for granted.

But you're likely to be with someone new, the old ones probably won't stick and your standards possibly higher

 

[Dam44]

I brought up length because he's using YOUR prepaid minutes... forget about a woman, he's wasting your minutes

But if you're just loaded with minutes all the time and you dont care then ok. The principle of it, is what would make him not a friend to me. We can both go after the same women, who cares, but don't waste my prepaid minutes. Go talk to her yourself and get her number. Your friend is a loser honestly

This makes sense

 

[mrgoodstuff]

But you're likely to be with someone new, the old ones probably won't stick and your standards possibly higher

Yeah, but the new one didn't build with you, so her environment might want you torn down. They tear a man down and set him where they want him to be.

 

[bat soup]

You call this guy a friend? You can't be so naive, with men or with women. Make a move on this girl before this wainker (or another one) muscless in.

 

[Dam44]

You call this guy a friend? You can't be so naive, with men or with women. Make a move on this girl before this wainker (or another one) muscless in.

Yeah, I thought he was. Now I'm having doubts.
Waiting for lockdown to be over so I can make a move. Besides that, everything is quite complicated now https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/advice-what-do-i-do-with-this-girl.265317/

 

[mrgoodstuff]

We're young. No kids at all

I meant entertainment for her friends. See some male and female dating lives exist as a "comedy" your part of.

 

[Dam44]

I meant entertainment for her friends. See some male and female dating lives exist as a "comedy" your part of.

Oh I get now. This could be true, she has been single for the past 3 years, as good as I know

 

[Dam44]

Easy. Stop pursuing her and let him have her. He will demolish it and you can use her as a FWB.

Men think that this is an accident when his friend is also compelled to pursue her. She has been creating this. From the start. She will manipulate both by slight subliminal flirting and eye contact. Who she is really f@cking is a secret to both.

Don’t kid yourself. You are being manipulated for attention. You are both pansies for falling for it.

stop pursuing and talk to other women yet be cordial. This will make her think you are not interested And She is no longer precious to you.
You have to let her go in your mind.

now because she manipulated a triangle, she has to pay for her insolence. When she starts to flirt a little harder with you...she will have to be punished for her gurl shyt. It’s time to pay the fiddler. Scorn her a little. She will be on her knees in no time.

skull fuk her senseless.

I kinda like this and it looks like it could work. Thanks

He is not really the type of friend that you want in your corner.

Normally I would just back off and be scarce and let her choose.

I'll be mindful of that. Yes, no more games. She has to make up her mind

 

[dude99]

So my friend(not too sure if I should still call him that) and I like the same girl.

We met on facebook after our university's admission list was released and since then we've been friends.

Then I met this girl I like in our first year (same department, I made a thread about her) too. I was very inexperienced then, didn't go fully for what I wanted. I was good friends with her though we'd flirt and all that

Then, second year, I discover he's interested in her. I'm not totally sure if he knew I was interested in her.

So I pretend like I don't know he wants her and he pretends like he doesn't know I like her. We didn't ever talk about us liking her. He was my next neighbour in my hostel. I'd go his room, he'd come to mine. (but I was more of the one going)

Now, here's what got me pissed. He tried playing dirty. So in my country, our phone lines are prepaid. You recharge it to get data or airtime. So I buy data most of the time but I get free Airtime bonus which I don't use most times cos I don't call often

He would come and say he run out of airtime and he needed to speak with someone. So I'd give him my phone. I didn't bother to check my call logs.

Until one day, another mutual friend tipped me off comically that he had been calling my crush with my phone just after I had given him my phone again and told me to stop giving it to him

When he returned it, I checked my logs and it was true. I stopped giving him my phone since then but right now that I remember, I feel angry and betrayed.

We've not spoken so well since this pandemic

Are real friends that difficult to find?

I know I'm at fault too but what should one do when your friend is interested in the same girl?

And most friends I try to get advice from are not very sincere. I feel like they're after her too.

I really need to learn how to keep stuff to myself

If this guy is a true genuine friend you never put a chick before that. Chicks are a dime a dozen. You had girlfriends before this chick you will have a dozen more after her. A friendship if it is a friendship isn't replaceable.

All that being said it sounds like this guy is more of an acquaintance that is taking advantage of communicating with a chick on your dime. Doesn't sound like a friend. Sounds like an opportunist.

Ask the chick out. Don't beat around the bush. Dont hesitate. Ask her out. Never mind him in this situation. Her answer will tell you everything you need to know

 

[Dam44]

I guess that the finer point might have escaped you. If I’m wrong, just disregard. It’s not to get the girl. After you see the manipulation for what it is...do you think you would still want her? Will you not see more of what’s going on around you after that? Would you not see how, from the viewpoint of men, how trite and ridiculous it is and how it turned you into a desperate maggot?

would you not then, throw out part of your learned behavior? Or would you still think she is a coveted, golden goddess to be worshiped? How much of your thoughts have been recently tied up with your obsession to have a girl that created a destructive triangle, that in the past, caused men to kill each other in fits of rage? Running each other through with rapiers and cutlasses? Destroying lives and prosperity.

toss out your learned behavior and learn how to observe. Your conduct makes you a fool and a centered man will easily take her from you and fuk every hole she has and send her back to you. Just so you can cuddle and stroke her hair and think how fortunate you are to have her.

I say this not to put you down or lessen you. Only to open your mind up. You are doomed with this woman. What I wrote is not a technique to get the girl. Aren’t you even a little bit angry at her for using her sex to create friction between two men? Really?

Yes, I'm a bit angry at her for this. Maybe I detest her a bit too but don't you think is somehow too extreme?

I'm no longer going after her, if she comes around, fine. If not, fine too

 

[Dam44]

If this guy is a true genuine friend you never put a chick before that. Chicks are a dime a dozen. You had girlfriends before this chick you will have a dozen more after her. A friendship if it is a friendship isn't replaceable.

All that being said it sounds like this guy is more of an acquaintance that is taking advantage of communicating with a chick on your dime. Doesn't sound like a friend. Sounds like an opportunist.

Ask the chick out. Don't beat around the bush. Dont hesitate. Ask her out. Never mind him in this situation. Her answer will tell you everything you need to know

Thank you

 

[Dam44]

Why would it be extreme? Let’s say you and your buddy were doing things and interacting and another man comes between you and attempts to wreck your friendship for his own nefarious gain? Do you have another standard just for women?

Where did this idea of “extreme” come from? Take a minute and think about where that comes from. Feminism doesn’t want equality. They want dominance of the sexual existence over men with most men never procreating. Ever.

men who are good with women would be chewing her arse right now or rolling their eyes and letting her know it’s a slut move. This is why they get to procreate and other men don’t. This is calling them out. This is a slut game. Men do not participate in slut games. Bastards rule the roost. The other men are eunuchs.

Extreme would be punching her out. Anything less than that will create desire for you. No matter what you think.

Read this and I feel stupid. I'm really clueless
It wouldn't be extreme if she were a guy
Thanks

 

[Dam44]

You can be cucked by a guy too. Your “friend” is obviously cucking you. Humans give too much meaning to labels. The term “friend” doesn’t mean anything. What matters as men are principles. He betrayed you, plain and simple. It was deceptive and inconsiderate.

I mean what kind of guy borrows another dudes phone to hit up girls on his speed dial behind his back? Lol. If you think this type of guy friend is “rare” and a “keeper” then you have low standards when it comes to friends.

You have to set boundaries when it comes to women AND men. Setting boundaries is the purpose of every relationship with people. It will reflect to them how much you respect and love yourself and they will treat you accordingly or get dismissed.

I'm still angry at his betrayal.
I think my standards when it comes to friends are quite high. I talk to a loot of people but I only consider a few as friends.

I guess he took advantage of the fact that I was naive. I should work more on setting boundaries. I have learnt a lot from this post, thanks

 

[HyenaPrince]

I'm still angry at his betrayal.
I think my standards when it comes to friends are quite high. I talk to a loot of people but I only consider a few as friends.

I guess he took advantage of the fact that I was naive. I should work more on setting boundaries. I have learnt a lot from this post, thanks

What he did is something even someone with low standards would find pretty sh*tty. That's not a friendship you two are having there.

 

[Dam44]

What he did is something even someone with low standards would find pretty sh*tty. That's not a friendship you two are having there.

It's good I know better now

 

[Dam44]

You’re not stupid. Just programmed.

I've started reading the Book of Pook, that should help?

 

[corrector]

So my friend(not too sure if I should still call him that) and I like the same girl.

We met on facebook after our university's admission list was released and since then we've been friends.

Then I met this girl I like in our first year (same department, I made a thread about her) too. I was very inexperienced then, didn't go fully for what I wanted. I was good friends with her though we'd flirt and all that

Then, second year, I discover he's interested in her. I'm not totally sure if he knew I was interested in her.

So I pretend like I don't know he wants her and he pretends like he doesn't know I like her. We didn't ever talk about us liking her. He was my next neighbour in my hostel. I'd go his room, he'd come to mine. (but I was more of the one going)

Now, here's what got me pissed. He tried playing dirty. So in my country, our phone lines are prepaid. You recharge it to get data or airtime. So I buy data most of the time but I get free Airtime bonus which I don't use most times cos I don't call often

He would come and say he run out of airtime and he needed to speak with someone. So I'd give him my phone. I didn't bother to check my call logs.

Until one day, another mutual friend tipped me off comically that he had been calling my crush with my phone just after I had given him my phone again and told me to stop giving it to him

When he returned it, I checked my logs and it was true. I stopped giving him my phone since then but right now that I remember, I feel angry and betrayed.

We've not spoken so well since this pandemic

Are real friends that difficult to find?

I know I'm at fault too but what should one do when your friend is interested in the same girl?

And most friends I try to get advice from are not very sincere. I feel like they're after her too.

I really need to learn how to keep stuff to myself

Flip a coin.

 

[Dam44]

Thank you everyone for your contributions, they are an eye opener for me

Suppose this girl texts me(she did this morning and I replied, I left the rest unreplied), do I reply? If yes, engage her?or just short/dismissive texts