"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Broke no contact after 4 months.

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RicBoy

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For reference my stripey in under the thread "current situation".

Yesterday I sent my ex gf a birthday msg to her phone. I think a quite good chance she had me blocked. So I asked her best friend to pass her msg to her. A her friend read it but didn't reply.
Here is the msg:

Happy birthday! I hope you had a good day and everything is good with you and your daughter. I was wrong the way I treated you, I see it now. I just want you to know I don't hold any resentment for the past. Take good care of yourself and your daughter.

She didn't reply.
Im assuming even if I was blocked, there's a 100% change her friend gave her the msg?
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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Lynx nkaf

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For reference my stripey in under the thread "current situation".

Yesterday I sent my ex gf a birthday msg to her phone. I think a quite good chance she had me blocked. So I asked her best friend to pass her msg to her. A her friend read it but didn't reply.
Here is the msg:

Happy birthday! I hope you had a good day and everything is good with you and your daughter. I was wrong the way I treated you, I see it now. I just want you to know I don't hold any resentment for the past. Take good care of yourself and your daughter.

She didn't reply.
Im assuming even if I was blocked, there's a 100% change her friend gave her the msg?
my ex's birthday is next week.
Watch me keep no contact for my sanity.

Not contacting them doesn't mean that I'm not still getting insomnia and delusions that I'm seeing them drive near my workplace still.

Moving on.
 

Scars

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my ex's birthday is next week.
Watch me keep no contact for my sanity.

Not contacting them doesn't mean that I'm not still getting insomnia and delusions that I'm seeing them drive near my workplace still.

Moving on.
I can't even remember any of my exes birthdays..

OP, I hope you learned your lesson.
 

RicBoy

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I really bad man..cant believe she didn't reply
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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bcude

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You're lucky not to have a restraining order on your hands soon and now you've also lowered yourself and destroyed all the progress you did with staying no contact in the process, despite all of us telling you not to break NC. If she blocks you or doesn't respond, do you think that's a sign that you can go through her friends?! This is the ultimate sign of complete meltdown desperation.

Her friend certainly told her about your message and now they have a laugh at how pathetically desperate you are unfortunately and strategize how to keep you away by any means necessary.

You think that by being nice and showing remorse, she will magically start to see what a good person you are, but in reality she's repulsed by you and you most probably ruined her special day by reminding her about your existence.

You have some SERIOUS work to do on yourself and i mean inner work, not job, cars or whatever superficial. Your mind and mindset is totally damaging you and ultimately your son. I don't say this to be mean but enough is enough, you're a man. Take responsibility and WAKE UP.
Use therapy if you need, it could be beneficial.
 

RicBoy

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You're lucky not to have a restraining order on your hands soon and now you've also lowered yourself and destroyed all the progress you did with staying no contact in the process, despite all of us telling you not to break NC. If she blocks you or doesn't respond, do you think that's a sign that you can go through her friends?! This is the ultimate sign of complete meltdown desperation.

Her friend certainly told her about your message and now they have a laugh at how pathetically desperate you are unfortunately and strategize how to keep you away by any means necessary.

You think that by being nice and showing remorse, she will magically start to see what a good person you are, but in reality she's repulsed by you and you most probably ruined her special day by reminding her about your existence.

You have some SERIOUS work to do on yourself and i mean inner work, not job, cars or whatever superficial. Your mind and mindset is totally damaging you and ultimately your son. I don't say this to be mean but enough is enough, you're a man. Take responsibility and WAKE UP.
Use therapy if you need, it could be beneficial.
Won't be texting her no more man.. Was my last attempt at trying to have things on good terms with her. I'm done seriously.
Wanted to wish her happy birthday and tell her I hold no resentment for thr past
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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RicBoy

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Her friend probably showed her the msg
 

Robert28

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If you’d have left it as “happy birthday” and nothing more you would have been ok. That other stuff you talk about in person, not over text. And when in person you don’t bring it up, you let her bring it up. Then when you explain yourself keep it short, don’t go into some long deep explanation.
 

RicBoy

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If you’d have left it as “happy birthday” and nothing more you would have been ok. That other stuff you talk about in person, not over text. And when in person you don’t bring it up, you let her bring it up. Then when you explain yourself keep it short, don’t go into some long deep explanation.
Letting her know that I don't hold any resentment is not a deep explanation. Or that I know I did her wrong. Sure I could left it out but it's nothing much.

She is just done over all and that's why I she doesn't care
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

Read more...

Robert28

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Letting her know that I don't hold any resentment is not a deep explanation. Or that I know I did her wrong. Sure I could left it out but it's nothing much.

She is just done over all and that's why I she doesn't care
You would have conveyed ALL of that with just a simple “happy birthday”. You don’t want to have that conversation over text because it’s not genuine. You want to get her to see you in person.
 

RicBoy

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You would have conveyed ALL of that with just a simple “happy birthday”. You don’t want to have that conversation over text because it’s not genuine. You want to get her to see you in person.
Well she is gonna come around in August anyways when my son moves here. Nothing to worry. She is probably dating now too that's why she doesn't care to reply. Not gonna say anything more just wait.

That's my story https://www.sosuave.net/forum/threads/current-situation.264765/
 

derby1

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Not gonna say anything more just wait.
perhaps watch a few rom coms, in this thumb sucking time slot.

Oh god she is going to destroy you OP , ...........and it will be all your fault.

Commandment number : its the mans fault , what women do is what they do
 

Mike41090

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Hopefully this gives you incentive to move on completely. Everyone and their mother knows that sending a happy birthday text to an ex (especially one who dumped you) is absolutely ridiculous and pathetic. It really is pretty simply in regards to what to do when your dumped: agree with the breakup, stated you enjoyed your time with her and leave it at that FOREVER. Continue living your life, your only on this planet for x amount of time. Stuff like this makes reiterates my opinion that females RUN society. Because of sad **** like this. You honestly make all of us look bad.. maybe that’s a stretch and too harsh but there’s some truth to it, especially in 2020,but the thought crossed my mind. Just move on and live life.
 

Mbuckets82

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Why don’t you live near your son? He needs you more than anyone. Or better question, why did you allow the mother to take him away?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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