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Did i force myself on her?

Shashank

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I've been talking abt a girl I met in a different city, plz see my past thread, briefly, I kissed this girl in a different city where her only frnd was me, she gave me a closed lip kiss but was smiling the whole time, I used to grab her ass, grope her, she smiled n moved away she never reciprocated what I did.... I thought saying no is enough for me to go ahead n did it.... Now she's ignoring me in our native city, so yesterday I confronted her bcos it's a headache for me... So she started opening up on chat with me, didn't wanna talk on phone, she said, " I can't talk to u bcos u took advantage of me when we were there n touched me everywhere n i know u still went ahead bcos I didn't say no no didn't complain abt it but I didn't become harsh bcos u had exams n i didn't want u to get disturbed during exams so I suffered i thought u would understand n stop...i still wanted to give u a chance so I called u after coming here to this city but u haven't changed at all, u r still touching me intimately, how can anyone do that? The only mistake of mine was I was very good with u that's it I learned a lesson".

Guys, at that time she used to smile when I touched her so I thought she liked it n enjoyed it, she is young n where I live it's really a big thing to kiss someone just after one month after meeting n groping is out of the bounds but as she was smiling I just did it, but now she is saying I took advantage of her n she can't hang out with me anymore.. .. I feel terrible guys, she used to text me everyday (after those things happened) now she's not talking n telling me I haven't changed n there's no point in talking to me bcos I will take advantage of her again... Am I a monster? Did I really forced myself on her? (I think I did guys just she talked to me very good even after that so I thought she liked it.. Idk what to do)
 

RangerMIke

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Yea.... you went too far. You really need to get better at reading women. You are not a monster, you just miss-read the signals she was sending out. You need to learn from this, but don't beat yourself up. Another chick at another time what you were doing wouldn't be a problem.

Seduction is a step by step process... bit by bit you escalate... if at any time in this gradual process she does not reciprocate, or she pulls back... you stop. Sounds like you were moving along and didn't really notice she was resisting. Many younger women will not say anything if you cross a line until you have completely destroyed the encounter... then you're done forever. No problem, there are 3 billion women in the world... go get practice.
 

backseatjuan

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Geez, let me guess, India.

You see boy, that girl likes to be touched and she is really down for sex, she would like to try it all. That don't mean you went the right way for it, because if you did, you'd fck her.

Once she moved back to her city it's not not ok for that type of behaviour. It's a slut defence.

Relax. She's not gonna tell anyone about anything. Realize you suck at touching women because everything has to have a purpose, in your case purpose is sex. Rearl to get layed. Realize it's not your fault she is having a slut defence in her home city. Partly it is of course, because she don't want that type of behaviour around where she lives.

No big deal.
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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If a girl is distant, remote, flake, dodgey, and anything but compliant, next her. RooshV is bang on. She pulls away, you mirror her right back. More important in the metoo false accusations epidemic.
 

Serenity

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Am I a monster? Did I really forced myself on her?
Not really, you didn't know she didn't like it and you were too incompetent to understand her very subtle signals. You'd be in the wrong if you knew she didn't like it but proceeded anyways.

So what's happening here is that she feels taken advantage of and you didn't intend to do that, it's a misunderstanding.

So for next time, if she doesn't reciprocate just stop. Smiling is not enough of a signal she's into it, she's just being too polite. You'd probably want a woman to touch you back anyways. She learned her lesson, now you should learn yours.

You could tell her you didn't intend to take advantage of her, that you didn't know, that you're sorry you made her feel that way and that you'll leave her alone from now on.
 

Prettyboy Dee

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Yes, you definitely crossed lines. You're bigger and stronger. That's just the way it is. Never initiate physical contact with a woman. It isn't necessary. Men attract. Women seduce. If she isn't seducing, you aren't attracting. Instead of YOU trying to become better at seducing(a feminine art), you should be working on becoming better at attracting(the masculine art). Forcing yourself on a woman may get you laid, and may even NOT get you arrested, but it will ALWAYS breed buyer's remorse...and if you think creating a list of women who regret sleeping with you will improve your reputation or self-esteem, think again.

Apologize to this woman, sincerely and unreservedly, and then completely cut communication. Then, move on.

[Initiation of physical contact, relentless aggression(seduction), and the predictable buyer's remorse are the primary reasons PUAs have such a loathsome reputation among women, and are actually even being barred in certain jurisdictions; it isn't because they're leaving a trail of happy customers]
Definitely some truth to this, good post but I disagree, you will miss out on lots of pvssy by sitting waiting on women to initiate sex lol that's not what real men do, females show there DTF by letting you physical touch them, if you have experience with women then this will go smooth, unfortunately The OP is still learning.

Telling guys to let women seduce them is not necessarily wrong but a real Playa has the balls and confidence to make physical moves on a girl,

Can I sit back and let women seduce me? Sure, but I get more pleasure being a man and making things happen. It's like sitting and waiting on girls to hit on you instead of hitting on them.
 

Prettyboy Dee

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OP, you initiating physical contact was not the problem and dont let anyone here tell you otherwise, it wasnt what you did, it was HOW you did it.
 

MountainSlide

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I've been talking abt a girl I met in a different city, plz see my past thread, briefly, I kissed this girl in a different city where her only frnd was me, she gave me a closed lip kiss but was smiling the whole time, I used to grab her ass, grope her, she smiled n moved away she never reciprocated what I did.... I thought saying no is enough for me to go ahead n did it.... Now she's ignoring me in our native city, so yesterday I confronted her bcos it's a headache for me... So she started opening up on chat with me, didn't wanna talk on phone, she said, " I can't talk to u bcos u took advantage of me when we were there n touched me everywhere n i know u still went ahead bcos I didn't say no no didn't complain abt it but I didn't become harsh bcos u had exams n i didn't want u to get disturbed during exams so I suffered i thought u would understand n stop...i still wanted to give u a chance so I called u after coming here to this city but u haven't changed at all, u r still touching me intimately, how can anyone do that? The only mistake of mine was I was very good with u that's it I learned a lesson".

Guys, at that time she used to smile when I touched her so I thought she liked it n enjoyed it, she is young n where I live it's really a big thing to kiss someone just after one month after meeting n groping is out of the bounds but as she was smiling I just did it, but now she is saying I took advantage of her n she can't hang out with me anymore.. .. I feel terrible guys, she used to text me everyday (after those things happened) now she's not talking n telling me I haven't changed n there's no point in talking to me bcos I will take advantage of her again... Am I a monster? Did I really forced myself on her? (I think I did guys just she talked to me very good even after that so I thought she liked it.. Idk what to do)
Unless you got dough like Donald Trump you can’t just grab her by the pu$$y k?
 

MountainSlide

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Let me be a little clearer on this: there are certainly times and types of girls who will never initiate physical contact, but there's a HUUUUGE difference between knowing when a girl wants you to take her, and hoping you can touch her in the right way to make her want you. If you are oblivious to the former and relying on the latter, you are building a trail of regret into your "success" rate. Trust me. If that doesn't matter to you, then you have more "boldness" than self-respect. You should be able to build desire in a woman without ever touching her; if you can't, your problem isn't HOW you touched her.
If it’s a girl that I haven’t been intimate with before. I’ll stand close to them or sit close to them without touching. I allow them to initiate some light touch then I escalate. That’s just me though.
 

Prettyboy Dee

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Let me be a little clearer on this: there are certainly times and types of girls who will never initiate physical contact, but there's a HUUUUGE difference between knowing when a girl wants you to take her, and hoping you can touch her in the right way to make her want you. If you are oblivious to the former and relying on the latter, you are building a trail of regret into your "success" rate. Trust me. If that doesn't matter to you, then you have more "boldness" than self-respect. You should be able to build desire in a woman without ever touching her; if you can't, your problem isn't HOW you touched her.
True enough........

But let me add, knowing when to initiate contact is where the smoothness comes in, its reading her and then having the balls to make a move at the right time, which is why the OP did what he did, he just did it the wrong way, it was weird and awkward for her which is why he got the response he got.

It's not about building enough attraction to make her wanna initiate physical contact, though, me and you both know it happens and I agree on that point, but, it's more about knowing when to escalate physically.

Me personally? I like to build the anticipation and tease them a little bit by making small moves like I'm going for it then stop and start doing something else, but when I feel that vibe I go for it. Maybe she would off initiated physical contact maybe not but I dont care, I take the lead and make the move.
 

MountainSlide

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Me personally? I like to build the anticipation and tease them a little bit by making small moves like I'm going for it then stop and start doing something else, but when I feel that vibe I go for it.
That’s actually a good technique. Two steps forward one back. Builds anticipations and tension. Which makes the woman more turned on. I’ll use that soon :up:
 

MountainSlide

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I remember when I was younger and dumber and I always thought it was finding the right words though lol
 

Shashank

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Yea.... you went too far. You really need to get better at reading women. You are not a monster, you just miss-read the signals she was sending out. You need to learn from this, but don't beat yourself up. Another chick at another time what you were doing wouldn't be a problem.

Seduction is a step by step process... bit by bit you escalate... if at any time in this gradual process she does not reciprocate, or she pulls back... you stop. Sounds like you were moving along and didn't really notice she was resisting. Many younger women will not say anything if you cross a line until you have completely destroyed the encounter... then you're done forever. No problem, there are 3 billion women in the world... go get practice.
yeah ..at that time the way she behaved made me think she was completely into me...she probably doesnt even know that at that time that she was into me i guess.....or maybe she is extroverted....i learnt that some girls just smile when they are nervous maybe she is one of such rare kind. or maybe she liked what i did at that time...cos even after i did those things after my exams once i went home she used to text me every freaking day n used to talk so good when i called but that is bcos she is extroverted i guess.
 

Shashank

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Geez, let me guess, India.

You see boy, that girl likes to be touched and she is really down for sex, she would like to try it all. That don't mean you went the right way for it, because if you did, you'd fck her.

Once she moved back to her city it's not not ok for that type of behaviour. It's a slut defence.

Relax. She's not gonna tell anyone about anything. Realize you suck at touching women because everything has to have a purpose, in your case purpose is sex. Rearl to get layed. Realize it's not your fault she is having a slut defence in her home city. Partly it is of course, because she don't want that type of behaviour around where she lives.

No big deal.
it is not where her parents live but she used to text me everyday even after i touched her n ****....even after i did all those let's assume she didn't like them then when i was leaving that city she gave a full body hug to me not a friendly hug...n texted me everyday since then ....she said," Shashank i will forget whatever happened here but i am giving u another chance n when i reach hyderabad we will be frnds n don't touch me" even after this i touched her slightly in a sexual way after cmng here....she said yesterday u blew ur chances....i never faced this kinda situation before so i didn't know how to react n also bcos of ur exams i couldn't say anything to u cos u might get depressed.
 
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