"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Post hookup behavior

GrowingPains

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Last night I had a girl over. After we did our thing we chatted and joked for a couple minutes then I started putting my clothes on and making my way to take her to her car.

Everything up to this point was cool. Date was fun, sex was great. Kissed her goodbye and went back to my apartment.

She called and asked if she did something wrong to be 'unceremoniously' kicked out. I said no and that I had a good time. I just figured I'd sleep in my bed and she'd sleep in hers.

She told me this is her first time hooking up with someone outside of a relationship, so I think that's why she wasn't sure about what just happened. But how do you guys handle parting ways after a hookup? I don't think I did anything to make her feel like she did something wrong, but I wanna make someone else won't feel negatively about hooking up in the future.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Rainman4707

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After sex women want to cuddle, lie there..she might cuddle up to you.

I wouldn't fu*k her then go to sleep.

So after I've cuddled for ten mins or so, then if you want to go, then go. Nothing wrong with that.

I think women just don't want to feel used & abused.
 

Mazer

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I have to be up at 5am for work usually does the trick. When possible, always bang them at their place. That way you can just say, I have a bit of a drive ahead of me and I have work very early. Peace out.
Sounds like she has low self esteem if she is already starting with this BS. Invite her over again, “Hey babe, let’s get together next Friday” that should quiet her down but I see more BS in the foreseeable future with this woman.
 

fanatic22

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If you invite her to your place at night then she is expecting to sleep with you. I’d be pissed if I was her. If you want to bang and leave then go to hers.
 

GrowingPains

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If you invite her to your place at night then she is expecting to sleep with you. I’d be pissed if I was her. If you want to bang and leave then go to hers.
It was just the first date, mate.

She's all good btw. She texted and we're cool. Just a new situation for her. Definitely going to try some of the other suggestions here next time though.
 
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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HughJasolphd

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Depends on how much I like the chick. If there's a strong vibe, she can stay the night- stay up, talk about random ****, joke around, probably **** a second time & then tell her I got work in the morning, so I get em to leave around 4-5am.
I like girls who make it easy & want to leave a few mins after we're done lol
 

fanatic22

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It was just the first date, mate.

She's all good btw. She texted and we're cool. Just a new situation for her. Definitely going to try some of the other suggestions here next time though.
It doesn’t matter which date it was...Sex isn’t too intimate for the first date but sleeping over is? Lucky for you she has no self respect. You clearly insulted her. It actually boggles my mind that you aren’t fully aware of that.
 

GrowingPains

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It doesn’t matter which date it was...Sex isn’t too intimate for the first date but sleeping over is? Lucky for you she has no self respect. You clearly insulted her. It actually boggles my mind that you aren’t fully aware of that.
Hmm.. I'll have to think about this one. I'm trying to understand your side, but I'm having trouble. Maybe you can help.

Why is it disrespectful?

I asked a close girl friend of mine. She said she would like to sleep over but doesn't have any expectation either way. This leads me to believe it's not disrespectful. Particularly because the girl shouldn't have any expectation about staying at my place. I was asking how to part ways respectfully.
 

fanatic22

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Hmm.. I'll have to think about this one. I'm trying to understand your side, but I'm having trouble. Maybe you can help.

Why is it disrespectful?

I asked a close girl friend of mine. She said she would like to sleep over but doesn't have any expectation either way. This leads me to believe it's not disrespectful. Particularly because the girl shouldn't have any expectation about staying at my place. I was asking how to part ways respectfully.
It’s simply a cultural norm to allow someone you’ve had sex with to sleep over. The opposite is transactional/how you treat a hooker. If I didn’t want her to sleep over I would tell her before we had sex.
 
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